Reclaim Compassion

Shed your shame. Renew your hope. Rediscover the parent you know you can be. Is your adoption journey turning out differently than you imagined? You had so much love to give, but now you feel ashamed and bewildered by your lack of compassion. You may be experiencing blocked care-a self-protective mechanism in your nervous system that makes it difficult to connect with your child and maintain compassion. When it happens, it's like your heart seems to have left the relationship. But the good news is you are not a bad parent. You can heal from blocked care, and compassion can be rekindled in your heart. Written by two adoptive parents who have overcome blocked care, Reclaim Compassion answers the questions, "How did this happen?" and "Will it ever get better?" You'll recognize yourself in the honest stories from the authors and other parents and come to realize that you are not alone. Rooted in faith and backed by neuroscience, this practical and powerful guide offers a simple step-by-step process for reclaiming compassion for your child and yourself. "Lisa and Melissa's holistic-brain, body, and spirit-approach to understanding and overcoming blocked care will lead you to personal healing and meaningful connection with your children. Every foster and adoptive parent should read this book!" Jamie Finn, author of Foster the Family, Director, Foster the Family "Reclaim Compassion practically and compassionately addresses part of parenting that no one wants to talk about. Lisa C. Qualls and Melissa Corkum are the go-to experts on blocked care, and this book is proof. No one understands it better than they do. We can't recommend this book enough!" Mike and Kristin Berry, hosts of The Honestly Adoption Podcast, coauthors of Securely Attached Lisa C. Qualls and Melissa Corkum serve thousands of adoptive parents by providing post-adoption support through their podcast, books, speaking, and coaching. To learn more, find Lisa and Melissa at www.reclaimcompassion.com

Over the years, our nation's value system has been disrupted. During the rise of our present generation and the birthing of a new generation, our nation's caring and compassion appear to have diminished. People are more concerned with their own self-preservation and self-worth. Careers have become the focal point of men and women alike. People have become self-centered, looking for the advancement of their cause, and unfortunately, it is at the expense of love and compassion. Why is compassion in our society on the decline? Dr. Donald Davis seeks to find the causes of and solutions to this decline in his study, The Demise of Compassion: A Casualty of a Changing Culture. In this study, Dr. Davis explores: • compassion versus culture • the essence of compassion • the challenges facing compassion • and the path that is leading to compassion's demise • the road to recovery By utilizing over thirty years of pastoral experience with the thoughts of the leading experts on compassion, Dr. Davis provides a tough but fair look at what is happening in our modern society. Join Dr. Davis as he analyzes the trends in compassion today and shares simple, everyday ways that compassion can be restored in The Demise of Compassion: A Casualty of a Changing Culture.

Compassion plays a central role in the teachings of all world religions. Christianity in particular demonstrates its vitality through compassionate engagement with those suffering with Christ serving as a paradigm and source of motive power. These concrete acts of mercy and solidarity disclose God's intimate regard for the welfare of humanity. The purpose of this book is to affirm compassion as the pulsating heartbeat of Christian theology and praxis through the hermeneutical perspectives of brain science, psychology, and practical theology. More importantly, it offers readers specific compassion cultivation practices that will nurture the trait of compassion as a way of incarnating God's compassionate presence and response to a world marked with suffering of all kinds.

“A wonderful book for thinking about how to release ourselves from crippling processes. It's time for men—and for all of us—to stand up and say, ‘Give us back our full humanity, give us back our dignity.'” —Paul Gilbert, PhD, author of The Compassionate Mind In a recent FiveThirtyEight poll, 60 percent of men surveyed said society puts pressure on men to behave in a way that is unhealthy or bad. Men account for 80 percent of suicides in the United States, and three in ten American men have suffered from depression. Ed Adams and Ed Frauenheim say a big part of the problem is a model of masculinity that's become outmoded and even dangerous, to both men and women. The conventional notion of what it means to be a man—what Adams and Frauenheim call “Confined Masculinity”—traps men in an emotional straitjacket; steers them toward selfishness, misogyny, and violence; and severely limits their possibilities. As an antidote, they propose a new paradigm: Liberating Masculinity. It builds on traditional masculine roles like the protector and provider, expanding men's options to include caring, collaboration, emotional expressivity, an inclusive spirit, and environmental stewardship. Through hopeful stories of men who have freed themselves from the strictures of Confined Masculinity, interviews with both leaders and everyday men, and practical exercises, this book shows the power of a masculinity defined by what the authors call the five Cs: curiosity, courage, compassion, connection, and commitment. Men will discover a way of being that fosters healthy, harmonious relationships at home, at work, and in the world.

The author of Self-Compassion follows up her groundbreaking book with new ideas that expand our notion of self-kindness and its capacity to transform our lives, showing women how to balance tender self-acceptance with fierce action to claim their power and change the world. Kristin Neff changed how we talk about self-care with her enormously popular first book, Self-Compassion. Now, ten years and many studies later, she expands her body of work to explore a brand-new take on self-compassion. Although kindness and self-acceptance allow us to be with ourselves as we are, in all our glorious imperfection, the desire to alleviate suffering at the heart of this mindset isn't always gentle, sometimes it's fierce. We must also act courageously in order to protect ourselves from harm and injustice, say no to others so we can meet our own needs, and motivate necessary change in ourselves and society. Gender roles demand that women be soft and nurturing, not angry or powerful. But like yin and yang, the energies of fierce and tender self-compassion must be balanced for wholeness and wellbeing. Drawing on a wealth of research, her personal life story and empirically supported practices, Neff demonstrates how women can use fierce and tender self-compassion to succeed in the workplace, engage in caregiving without burning out, be authentic in relationships, and end the silence around sexual harassment and abuse. Most women intuitively recognize fierceness as part of their true nature, but have been discouraged from developing it. Women must reclaim their power in order to create a healthier society and find lasting happiness. In this wise, caring, and enlightening book, Neff shows women how to reclaim balance within themselves, so they can help restore balance in the world.

We live in an era of polarizing political and religious disagreement. Despite the lip service our society pays to tolerance, it's becoming more and more difficult to look past our differences and to recognize our common humanity. The way that we treat each other is a direct result of how we see one another, and our culture is full of warning signs that we aren't seeing each other correctly. In Reclaimed, author and cultural critic Andy Steiger explores the trend toward dehumanization that underlies our fraught times. People on both sides of the political aisle and from all walks of life share a deep desire for better understanding, justice, and human dignity. Yet we're uncertain how to achieve these aims. Steiger points to Jesus as the basis for rediscovering our common ground and our shared humanity. In Jesus we find not only that humans are unique, valuable, and bearers of rights and responsibilities, but also that our dehumanizing tendencies--our worst inclinations toward inhumanity--can be redeemed and restored. Jesus enables us to be fully human, and it's in him that we rediscover the kind of relationships and society for which so many people today are longing.

This study “brings to life a circle of writers and composers, with analyses of their major, minor . . . and forgotten works of Jewish music theater” (Abigail Gillman, author of Viennese Jewish Modernism). During the mid-19th century, the works of Arthur Schopenhauer and Richard Wagner sparked an impulse toward German cultural renewal and social change that drew on religious myth, metaphysics, and spiritualism. The only problem was that their works were deeply antisemitic and entangled with claims that Jews were incapable of creating compassionate art. By looking at the works of Jewish composers and writers who contributed to a lively and robust biblical theatre in fin de siècle Vienna, Caroline A. Kita shows how they reimagined myths of the Old Testament to offer new aesthetic and ethical views of compassion. These Jewish artists, including Gustav Mahler, Siegfried Lipiner, Richard Beer-Hofmann, Stefan Zweig, and Arnold Schoenberg, reimagined biblical stories through the lens of the modern Jewish subject to plead for justice and compassion toward the Jewish community. By tracing responses to antisemitic discourses of compassion, Kita reflects on the explicitly and increasingly troubled political and social dynamics at the end of the Habsburg Empire.

A compassionate guide to help you manage OCD symptoms, overcome feelings of shame and stigma, and revitalize your life! If you’re one of millions who suffer from obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), you’re all-too-familiar with feelings of anxiety, panic, shame, and uncertainty. In addition, the stigma associated with OCD can make you feel unworthy of receiving the compassion and kindness you need and deserve. You may even experience unwanted intrusive thoughts that result in harsh self-judgment—which can actually hinder your recovery and lead to additional mental health problems. So, how can you break this destructive cycle and start feeling better? The Self-Compassion Workbook for OCD outlines a step-by-step program to help you understand the emotional experience of OCD, and develop the tools you need to manage your disorder and build a better life. Drawing on a powerful combination of cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), exposure and response prevention (ERP), and compassion-focused therapy (CFT), this breakthrough guide will teach you how to balance intense emotions, lean into your fear, and focus on recovery. Over time, you’ll learn to replace self-judgment with kindness and self-compassion, so you can stop suffering and start thriving. Living with OCD can be extremely challenging, but it doesn’t have to rob you of your self-worth. You are so much more than your disorder! Let this book be your guide to discovering, supporting, and loving the best you that you can be.