Your Children Are Boring

"The funniest book of the year" Are you sick of a society that seems obsessed with children? Do you find modern parents insufferable? Your Children Are Boring is a uniquely humorous look at our culture's obsession with children, a world where virtually every advert has a squawking child in it, where pubs are full of wailing infants, and where every other Facebook post is tagged #ProudDad. Why do parents themselves behave like infants? Why having a child doesn't make you less selfish, why it's extremely unlikely that your child is in fact, 'special', and why modern parenting is ruining everything, not least the kids themselves. All the answers lie within, and it's your duty to read it. Yes, Your Children Are Boring will make you laugh, but it's much more than that. Once consumed you must take its teachings into the world and fix society. Or something. Oh and if you put 'Dad' or 'Mum' in your social media bios, this book is aimed at you. An excerpt from Your Children Are Boring: "There are more radical solutions available to us of course. I take my lead from the way we've societally turned smokers into pariahs at pubs. Let's create family areas in the pubs! Imagine, roped off areas out the back, covered in sick, where the tables are made of plastic rather than wood, soundproofed so we don't have to listen to you loudly slow-talking, or the baby crying. Or you could just go to McDonalds, which is where the kids want to be anyway. And that's another thing; does anyone think these kids want to go to a pub? They're not renowned for their rides and pits of plastic balls. But perhaps that's just a matter of time. We'll inevitably infantilise getting smashed like we seem intent on doing to everything else. You want it all don't you, your spoilt little brain thinks, 'I've had a child, but that doesn't mean I should modify my life. I still want pub, so baby come to pub!' Kids should be, and probably are, bored out of their tiny minds at pubs. It's where grown-ups go to bitch about their friends' new kitchen or boyfriend / girlfriend, not a playground, that's why they're full of glass, fruit machines and sharp edges. If we can be a little melodramatic though, you're a virus. You're ruining pubs like you ruined football and the cinema, colonising it like the most boring invading army in history armed with iPhones and Kleenex."

A New York Times Best Illustrated Book of 2019 Kirkus Reviews Best Book of the Year The Boring Book is a humorous picture book that follows the story of one particularly bored boy. As the story progresses, our protagonist discovers there's actually more to boredom than what meets the eye—more questions, more theories, and heaps of humor. This exploration of boredom from acclaimed author-illustrator Shinsuke Yoshitake playfully—and hilariously—unpacks the ways in which a seemingly stagnant state is actually a portal into a dynamic, life-enriching experience. • Embraces the topic of boredom—an ever-so-popular kid complaint—and runs with it • The unique comic format, fast pace, smart humor, and narrative approach makes it ideal for reluctant readers • A universally hilarious book that will amuse children ages 5 to 8, as well as adults In addition to banishing boredom, Yoshitake's distinctive illustrations promote visual literacy and show young readers what the process of creative thinking looks like. This smart, laugh-out-loud picture book just might change your child's perspective on the state of boredom forever. • A wonderful gift for parents, teachers, educators, librarians, caregivers, and anyone who has to answer to the statement "I'm bored!" • Perfect for readers of early chapter books • Great for fans of the Fox & Chick series by Sergio Ruzzier, Waiting Is Not Easy! (An Elephant and Piggie Book) by Mo Willems, and I'm Bored by Michael Ian Black

We all know what it's like to feel bored-it's the worst! But did you know that being bored is actually one of the most wonderful and powerful things in life? Some of the best things ever created or discovered happened when someone was bored. It's true! With this book, kids can learn to embrace and discover the benefits of boredom and realize their full potential.

When a bored girl meets a potato who finds children tedious, she tries to prove him wrong by demonstrating all of the things they can do, from turning cartwheels to using their imaginations. Full color.

When the words in a tedious tome decide that life is just too dull, they escape. The world will never be the same again. The words jump into street signs, they leap onto shop signs, they decorate pathways and roadways and ponds. But one day they go too far...Award-winning illustrator Vasanti Unka has created a picture book complete with lift-the-flap inserts which is as ingenious as it is delightful. The Boring Book explores the importance of books and words in a fun and imaginative way. Children and adults alike will love it. The Boring Book is NOT a boring book.

A New York Times Best Illustrated Book of 2019 Kirkus Reviews Best Book of the Year The Boring Book is a humorous picture book that follows the story of one particularly bored boy. As the story progresses, our protagonist discovers there's actually more to boredom than what meets the eye—more questions, more theories, and heaps of humor. This exploration of boredom from acclaimed author-illustrator Shinsuke Yoshitake playfully—and hilariously—unpacks the ways in which a seemingly stagnant state is actually a portal into a dynamic, life-enriching experience. • Embraces the topic of boredom—an ever-so-popular kid complaint—and runs with it • The unique comic format, fast pace, smart humor, and narrative approach makes it ideal for reluctant readers • A universally hilarious book that will amuse children ages 5 to 8, as well as adults In addition to banishing boredom, Yoshitake's distinctive illustrations promote visual literacy and show young readers what the process of creative thinking looks like. This smart, laugh-out-loud picture book just might change your child's perspective on the state of boredom forever. • A wonderful gift for parents, teachers, educators, librarians, caregivers, and anyone who has to answer to the statement "I'm bored!" • Perfect for readers of early chapter books • Great for fans of the Fox & Chick series by Sergio Ruzzier, Waiting Is Not Easy! (An Elephant and Piggie Book) by Mo Willems, and I'm Bored by Michael Ian Black

♥♥♥A book all parents have been looking for all their parental lives!♥♥♥ Finally, a picture book that will help you tackle awake kids and make them fall asleep in 48 hours or less. And yes, that's a guarantee. They will be asleep in 48 hours or less. For how long, you ask? Well... the average is 8 hours, but it could be anywhere between 1 minute and 12 hours or so. Best Boring Picture Book is a Book ① in the JOLLY GOOD BORING THINGS series. Ebook version is a picture book and parental guide, so YOU GET 2 FOR THE PRICE OF 1. If you buy a paperback you will benefit even more! Paperback version is 3 in 1, as the book can be used as a COLORING BOOK as well. Order your copy NOW! You will be glad you did. The Boring Things are a boring bunch, in a way, but very fun! Book ② in the series is titled Get to Know the Boring Things, where your child will find out all the silly names and fun facts about each character from Book 1. The second part of the book has space for creating your own characters: your child can draw their own characters, give them funny names, and write fun facts about each. The 3rd part of the book has designated space for illustrating and writing a story with lined and dotted spaces, and various boxes for the illustrations. ♥♥♥Enjoy! Being bored has never been so fun!♥♥♥

A fun book to help your children read. Having a boring day isn't fun, but with friends around there is always something to do.