Dragon And Chips Omnibus One

Three full-length novels in one volume! "An insane, inspired blend of high fantasy and low humour" Here's what you get! A Portion of Dragon and Chips A mild-mannered old robot has just been transported to a medieval kingdom, and things are quickly going from bad to worse. A homicidal knight is after his blood... or the robot equivalent. A greedy queen wants to bend him to her will. A conniving Master of Spies is hatching his own devious plan for the mechanical marvel. And worst of all, there's nowhere to get a recharge. A Butt of Heads Remember that mild-mannered robot trapped in a medieval kingdom? He's still there, and he has a load of new problems to deal with. First, he must lead a motley crew of adventurers on a quest to capture a baby dragon... ... and save them from the incensed parent dragons. Next, the City Guard is hunting him down, determined to drag him back to their master, a man desperate to find out what makes the robot tick... even if it means disassembly with a blunt axe. And, to cap it all off, two foreign nations are planning an invasion, five kingdoms are on the brink of war, and gigantic sea serpents, vengeful dragons and a drunken cadre of dwarves are determined to make life difficult for everyone. A Pair of Nuts on the Throne It's crunch time for the medieval kingdom! Our mild-mannered hero, the junky old robot, has a new ally. He's sure they've met before, but he can't quite put his finger on it. Actually, he can't quite put his finger on anything. Heads of state are dropping like flies, thanks to a series of improbable accidents, and war clouds are rolling in. The elves are building siege engines, human kingdoms are raising their armies, and the dwarves are nursing hangovers. Enjoy the laughs, chaos and misadventures in the third and final part of the Dragon and Chips trilogy.

Get the Dragon and Chips trilogy in a single, huge volume. Three novels in one! A creaky old robot shows up in a backward, medieval kingdom, promptly triggering all-out war. It's elves versus humans, humans versus dwarves, and pretty much everyone versus the goblins. At least there are no dragons to worry about, because they've been boned, filleted and barbecued to the brink of extinction. Hey, it's their own fault for being delicious. Throw in a wizard with pockets full of mysterious herbs, a volatile halfling with a hair-trigger temper and a barbarian who'd rather bed the nearest princess than wield his other mighty sword, and you have the makings of a crazed, epic trilogy. Can the robot survive this feudal insanity, or will he end up shared between the warring factions... literally? This single volume includes A Portion of Dragon and Chips, A Butt of Heads and A Pair of Nuts on the Thone. Get it now! Swearing: minorViolence: moderateSex: none/offscreen mentions

Did you bring the salt? A creaky old robot shows up in a backward, medieval kingdom, promptly triggering all-out war. It's elves versus humans, humans versus dwarves, and pretty much everyone versus the goblins. At least there are no dragons to worry about, because they've been boned, filleted and barbecued to the brink of extinction. Hey, it's their own fault for being delicious. Throw in a wizard with pockets full of mysterious herbs, a volatile halfling with a hair-trigger temper and a barbarian who'd rather bed the nearest princess than wield his other mighty sword, and you have the makings of a crazed, epic trilogy. Can the robot survive this feudal insanity, or will he end up shared between the warring factions... literally? This is the first novel in a humorous fantasy trilogy. Each book continues plot lines and character arcs from the previous title, with everything wrapping up in book three. They're not stand-alones! Also available: an omnibus edition containing all three titles, and an audiobook edition of the whole trilogy. Keywords: Humorous fantasy novel, book one in a trilogy, fantasy comedy book, fantasy humour, clean fantasy novels, young adult fantasy, ya comedy, parody novel, fantasy comedy novels, medieval humour, wizard humor, robot books

For the first time, get all three Harriet Walsh novels in one volume! All the Harriet Walsh novels are set in the distant future, where the galaxy has been colonised and human-like robots are commonplace. They're good clean fun, written with wry humor. PEACE FORCE Would you work for a deranged robot? Harriet Walsh does! Harriet's weapon won't fire without the right paperwork, the patrol car is driving her up the wall, and her crime-fighting computer doesn't even have solitaire. Welcome to the Peace Force! ALPHA MINOR The Peace Force has a new recruit, and she's driving everyone crazy. From disobeying orders to handling unauthorised cases, nothing is off-limits. Worse, Harriet Walsh is forced to team up with the newbie, because the recruit's shady past has just caught up with her. Meanwhile, a dignitary wants to complain about rogue officers working out of the station. She insists on meeting the station's commanding officer ... and they don't have one. All up, it's another typical day in the Peace Force! SIERRA BRAVO Planet Dismolle is supposed to be a peaceful haven. So what's with all the gunfire? A criminal gang has moved into Chirless, Dismolle's second major city. Elderly residents are fed up with the loud music, noisy cars and late night parties, not to mention hold-ups, muggings and the occasional gunfight. Chirless has no Peace Force, so Harriet Walsh of the Dismolle City branch has to help out. That puts her up against a gang of hardened criminals with only her training pistol and a few old allies to lend a hand. And these allies aren't just old, they're positively ancient! Keywords: sci fi police, future police, sci fi with strong female protagonist, sci fi crime book, female sci fi, robot books, police robot, robot science fiction, flying cars, society of the future, sci fi policing

Meet Mink, the love struck, demon-hunting dragon-girl who took early anime fandom by storm! Mink has fallen for the dreamy idol, Dick Saucer, but there’s a problem: Dick’s not just an idol–he’s a dragon slayer, too...and Mink is half dragon! Now Mink and her friends must set out on a quest to destroy the Demon Lord Azetodeth and gain a potion that will make Mink human! Will Mink find true love or is this doomed to be a fetch quest failure? BONUS FEATURES: Art Galleries, Color Pages, Commentary...and more!

"I read it at a sitting and couldn't put it down." - Tom Holt Hal Spacejock Omnibus One contains three full-length novels plus a bonus short story. Here's what you get: A Robot Named Clunk (Hal Spacejock Book 1) Clunk, a clapped-out robot, is convinced he's about to be junked. Instead, his penny-pinching boss is sending him off to be refurbished. Being old and wise, Clunk knows there's a catch, but at first it doesn't seem too bad. He just has to help a freelancer pick up some cargo. Unfortunately, Hal Spacejock - the freelancer - is obstinate, over-confident, and woefully under-skilled, and he's never going to let a lowly robot fly his precious ship. Is there any chance this pair of misfits can lift off, collect the cargo and deliver it in one piece? Or will they fly straight into the nearest star, still bickering and fighting over the controls? Second Course (Hal Spacejock Book 2) Hal Spacejock's cargo business is going so well he's considering getting into passengers ... especially the beautiful and mysterious Sonya Polarov. Clunk's certain she's up to something, but as usual Hal won't listen to a word he says ... Meanwhile, Rex Curtis runs the galaxy's biggest freight company, and he's sick of independent pilots stealing his cargo jobs. He's determined to make a statement by destroying the biggest nuisance of them all: Hal Spacejock. Just Desserts (Hal Spacejock Book 3) Hal's new-fangled, bargain-bin stasis generator has just failed, exactly as Clunk predicted, and now their valuable cargo of fresh food is in danger of rotting away. They leave their ship and head off to find replacement parts, which is a real shame, because a secret agent wants Hal's ship for an urgent mission ... with or without his permission. Visit (A Hal Spacejock short story) Hal returns from a shopping trip and finds Clunk in a right old state. Break out the crayons and colouring sheets ... they're booked in for a school visit! About the Hal Spacejock series Set in the distant future, where humanity spans the galaxy and robots are second-class citizens, the Hal Spacejock series will strike a chord with fans of Red Dwarf and Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, while forging its own off-beat path through the cosmos. There are currently nine novels in the Hal Spacejock series, as well as the Harriet Walsh and Hal Junior spin-offs (three novels each.) Clunk the robot also features in Simon's brand new fantasy trilogy, beginning with A Portion of Dragon and Chips. Omnibus Two, containing Hal Spacejock books 4-6, is also available. So is Omnibus Three, containing books 7-9. A Robot Named Clunk is also available as an audiobook. Reviews "Riddled with slapstick humour and glib one-liners" - Courier Mail "Anyone who has ever had a frustrating run-in with a computer, or had to suffer bureaucratic thuggery, or who just wants a great story that will keep you smiling, this book is for you." - /dev/random "A well-constructed tale with plenty of twists and turns and a good few laughs." amazon review "All of the Hal Spacejock books are brilliant. Well written and easy to read with excellent story lines." amazon review.

Hal Spacejock Omnibus Three contains three full-length novels plus a bonus novella. Here's what you get: Big Bang (Hal Spacejock Book 7) A house clearance job sounds like easy money, but rising floodwaters, an unstable landscape and a surprise find are going to make life very difficult for Hal and Clunk. Double Trouble (Hal Spacejock Book 8) Hal Spacejock lands on planet Alteia, where he's so distracted by his own problems that he forgets to collect Clunk from the luggage rack. Not to worry, because a couple of old friends free Clunk from the spaceport ... only to reveal a great big ulterior motive: they want him to join their gang group. Meanwhile, Hal's remembered his trusty co-pilot at last ... but only because everyone's trying to kill him, and Clunk is big and metal and bulletproof-ish. Max Damage (Hal Spacejock Book 9) Hal and Clunk answer a distress call, and they discover a fellow pilot stranded deep inside an asteroid field. Clunk is busy at the controls, dodging incoming rocks, so Hal dons a spacesuit, takes the jetbike and sets off on a heroic rescue mission. If he'd only known the trouble he was getting himself into, he wouldn't have bothered... Albion (A Hal Spacejock novella) Hal takes an odd call from a team of scientists, and minutes later he and Clunk are boarding a shuttle for the nearby orbiter. Turns out the scientists need some vital information, and only Hal can help. Before long he's embroiled in a new adventure, and this one's really dangerous. About the Hal Spacejock series Set in the distant future, where humanity spans the galaxy and robots are second-class citizens, the Hal Spacejock series will strike a chord with fans of Red Dwarf and Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, while forging its own off-beat path through the cosmos. There are currently nine novels in the Hal Spacejock series, as well as the Harriet Walsh and Hal Junior spin-offs (three novels each.) Clunk the robot also features in Simon's brand new fantasy series, beginning with A Portion of Dragon and Chips. Omnibus One and Omnibus Two, containing Hal Spacejock books 1-6, are also available. Reviews "Riddled with slapstick humour and glib one-liners" - Courier Mail "Anyone who has ever had a frustrating run-in with a computer, or had to suffer bureaucratic thuggery, or who just wants a great story that will keep you smiling, this book is for you." - /dev/random "A well-constructed tale with plenty of twists and turns and a good few laughs." amazon review "All of the Hal Spacejock books are brilliant. Well written and easy to read with excellent story lines." amazon review.