Fart For Freedom

Two demented psychotic groups are engaged in a battle for moral, if not hygienic superiority. Fart For Freedom, with their freedom farters like the Silent But Deadly assassins and Curry Men explosive experts, are steadfastly led by their leaders; the Inner Rectum. Their sole purpose in life is to make the world a place where anyone can fart anytime and anywhere, without fear of retribution. Opposing them is STOP; the Society To Oppress Perverts- a group that brings a whole new meaning to the term anal retentiveness. Their puritanical view of the world sets them against the freedom farters at every turn. In the STOP world; clean equals serene. Unwillingly thrown into this turbulent situation is Algenon Plugg; a mild-mannered man with a traumatic past. After memories of his childhood catch up with him at a most inopportune time, he is hurled into a maelstrom that threatens death and destruction for anyone who crosses his path. If Fart For Freedom is to survive, they must eliminate the opposition before they themselves are eliminated.

A mention of flatulence might conjure up images of bratty high school boys or lowbrow comics. But one of the most eloquent—and least expected—commentators on the subject is Benjamin Franklin. The writings in Fart Proudly reveal the rogue who lived peaceably within the philosopher and statesman. Included are "The Letter to a Royal Academy"; "On Choosing a Mistress"; "Rules on Making Oneself Disagreeable"; and other jibes. Franklin's irrepressible wit found an outlet in perpetrating hoaxes, attacking marriage and other sacred cows, and skewering the English Parliament. Reminding us of the humorous, irreverent side of this American icon, these essays endure as both hilarious satire and a timely reminder of the importance of a free press.

"Fart Proudly" (also called "A Letter to a Royal Academy", and "To the Royal Academy of Farting") is the popular name of a "notorious essay" about flatulence written by Benjamin Franklin c. 1781 while he was living abroad as United States Ambassador to France.

This exhaustive work on flatulence breaks new wind on every aspect of abdominal gas in popular culture. A definitive taxonomy of farts details the characteristics of each variety, including barking spiders, cheek squeakers and green apple dirties. Philosophical positions on colonic expression are examined, from Confucius, Hume, Voltaire and the existentialists. Chapters cover a wide range of fart-focused stand-up comedy, cinema, children's books, toys and merchandise. The author's postscript describes a lifetime preparing for his subject through fraternity membership and offbeat assignments as a newspaper journalist.

FART ON THE BULLY, PRETTY MUCH SPEAKS FOR ITSELF. ITS AN OPEN BOOK. BULLYING IS WRONG AND IT NEEDS TO STOP IN THE UNIVERSE. THIS BOOK IS FOR ADULTS OR ANY CHILD THAT HAS BEEN BULLIED. FOCUS ON THE GOOD, FORGIVE AND UPLIFT EACH OTHER. WORKING ENVIRONMENT HAS BULLIES, CHURCHES HAVE BULLIES, BULLIES ARE EVERYWHERE. ONLY OUR FAITH CAN HELP US THROUGH THESE STRUGGLES THAT THE BULLY BRINGS TO THE TABLE. BE A BUDDY NOT A BULLY.

An colorfully illustrated encyclopedia of fart facts, jokes, riddles, and more! Flatulently funny and perfect for ages 7–12! With humorous entries that include types of farts, food items that cause gas, what farts are called in different countries, jokes and riddles, sidebars, science, rules, advice, how to’s, and more, this book is the gassiest gift for the fart fan in any family. It contains a mishmash of information, perfect for bathroom reading and rippin' jokes with your pals. Entries include: Dog, the: Who you blame when you pass gas at the dinner table. How to save a fart for later. Fart in a glass Mason jar. Quickly put the lid on and screw it tightly. Have a friend open it later. Once you’ve done this, send us a note telling us whether or not it worked. "Hoof Hearted Ice Melted:" Say it out loud five times. You’ll get it. Pull my finger: What someone says to a friend when they have a fart locked and loaded. Once the friend pulls the finger, the fart is unleashed. Great trick that only works once. Silent but deadly (SBD): A fart that comes out with barely a whisper but then knocks everyone out with its noxious stench.

Dry, offbeat, and mostly profane, this debut collection of humorous nonfiction glorifies all things inappropriate and TMI. A compendia of probing essays, lists, profiles, barstool rants, queries, pedantic footnotes, play scripts, commonplace miscellany, and overly revealing memoir, How to Be Inappropriate adds up to the portrait of an artist who bumbles through life obsessed with one thing: extreme impropriety. In How to Be Inappropriate, Daniel Nester determines the boundary of acceptable behavior by completely disregarding it. As a twenty-something hipster, he looks for love with a Williamsburg abstract painter who has had her feet licked for money. As a teacher, he tries out curse words with Chinese students in ESL classes. Along the way, Nester provides a short cultural history on mooning and attempts to cast a spell on a neighbor who fails to curb his dog. He befriends exiled video game king Todd Rogers, re-imagines a conversation with NPR’s Terry Gross, and invents a robot version of Kiss bassist Gene Simmons. No matter which misadventure catches their eye in this eclectic series of essays, How to Be Inappropriate makes readers appreciate that someone else has experienced these embarrassing sides of life, so that they won’t have to.

Meet Benjamin Franklin as you’ve never met him before . . . This hilarious collection includes the Founding Father’s satirical writings on farting, adultery, and other irreverent subjects you won’t find in your history books. A mention of flatulence might conjure up images of bratty high school boys or lowbrow comics. But one of the most eloquent—and least expected—commentators on the subject is Benjamin Franklin. The writings in Fart Proudly reveal the rogue who lived peaceably within the philosopher and statesman. Included are “The Letter to a Royal Academy”; “On Choosing a Mistress”; “Rules on Making Oneself Disagreeable”; and other jibes. Franklin’s irrepressible wit found an outlet in perpetrating hoaxes, attacking marriage and other sacred cows, and skewering the English Parliament. Reminding us of the humorous, irreverent side of this American icon, these essays endure as both hilarious satire and a timely reminder of the importance of a free press.