Forgiving Forward

What if we told you forgiveness was possible? What if the deepest betrayals could be dealt with here, today-right now? What if you could finally be free from torment? Too often we think of forgiveness as some long process we need to go through before we can have peace. Nothing could be further from the truth. Actually, forgiveness is transactional. When someone wounds us, a debt is incurred. The payment required to make us whole again is staggering. And who pays? No amount of apologies or other forms of restitution from the offending party could ever cover the cost of their sin that wounded us. But there is good news! God has given us a strategy in His Word to help us live out Gospel-centric forgiveness. To truly forgive someone, we must look to the Cross where the blood of Jesus covers all sin, including the ones that wound us. IF YOU CUT THE GOSPEL ANYWHERE, IT BLEEDS FORGIVENESS!

This is a message to the forgiven who have obtained the mercy of the Lord and have found healing for their hearts from the guilt of sin. It is Gods love that made it so through the cross, and as we stand overwhelmed by that love, looking with amazement to the one who gave us and forgave us, he points ahead to the next sinner and says to the forgiven, Do to him what I have done for you: pay it forward, forgive it forward. This book will bring you back to that time when you were pronounced justified and forgiven, and it will bring back a deeper appreciation for the love of God unto us by which we have become his children, and it will challenge us to look on others with the same look of mercy with which the Lord in Christ has looked upon us. This is a message for the unforgiven that the prisons of the heart may be emptied by the unlocking of the hearts with mercya challenge to pray for the unforgiven and a compassion toward the ones who have hurt and are still hurting us. God works forgiveness through the forgiveness of his children in amazing ways.

Archbishop Desmond Tutu, Nobel Peace Prize winner, Chair of The Elders, and Chair of South Africa’s Truth and Reconciliation Commission, along with his daughter, the Reverend Mpho Tutu, offer a manual on the art of forgiveness—helping us to realize that we are all capable of healing and transformation. Tutu's role as the Chair of the Truth and Reconciliation Commission taught him much about forgiveness. If you asked anyone what they thought was going to happen to South Africa after apartheid, almost universally it was predicted that the country would be devastated by a comprehensive bloodbath. Yet, instead of revenge and retribution, this new nation chose to tread the difficult path of confession, forgiveness, and reconciliation. Each of us has a deep need to forgive and to be forgiven. After much reflection on the process of forgiveness, Tutu has seen that there are four important steps to healing: Admitting the wrong and acknowledging the harm; Telling one's story and witnessing the anguish; Asking for forgiveness and granting forgiveness; and renewing or releasing the relationship. Forgiveness is hard work. Sometimes it even feels like an impossible task. But it is only through walking this fourfold path that Tutu says we can free ourselves of the endless and unyielding cycle of pain and retribution. The Book of Forgiving is both a touchstone and a tool, offering Tutu's wise advice and showing the way to experience forgiveness. Ultimately, forgiving is the only means we have to heal ourselves and our aching world.

In our culture the belief that "To err is human, to forgive divine," is so prevalent that few of us question its wisdom. But do we ever completely forgive those who have betrayed us? Aren't some actions unforgivable? Can we achieve closure and healing without forgiving? Drawing on more than two decades of work as a practicing psychotherapist, more than fifty indepth interviews, and sterling research into the concept of forgiveness in our society, Dr. Jeanne Safer challenges popular opinion with her own searching answers to these and other questions. The result is a penetrating look at what is often a lonely, and perhaps unnecessary, struggle to forgive those who have hurt us the most and an illuminating examination of how to determine whether forgiveness is, indeed, the best path to take--and why, often, it is not.

'A practical guide by the man Time magazine has called “the forgiveness trailblazer.” While it may seem like a simple enough act, forgiveness is a difficult, delicate process which, if executed correctly, can be profoundly moving and a deep learning experience. Whatever the scenario may be—whether you need to make peace with a certain situation, with a loved one or friend, or with a total stranger—the process of forgiveness is an art and a science, and this hands-on guide walks readers through it in 8 key steps. How can we become forgivingly “fit”? How can we identify the source of our pain and inner turmoil? How can we find meaning in what we have suffered, or learn to forgive ourselves? What should we do when forgiveness feels like a particularly tall order? All these questions and more are answered in this practical book, leading us to become more tolerant, compassionate, and hopeful human beings.

Too many of us feel trapped in stagnant romantic, family, or workplace relationships. Weighed down by toxic thoughts and emotions, we might be quick to judge and slow to pardon, and self-righteous about our feelings as we dwell on memories of what we or others did (or failed to do). In this tradepaper edition, Iyanla Vanzant challenges us to liberate ourselves from the wounds of the past and to embrace the new power of forgiveness. With Iyanla’s 21-Day Forgiveness Plan, you’ll explore relationship dynamics with your parents, children, friends, partners, co-workers, bosses, yourself, and even God. With journaling work and Emotional Freedom Techniques (also known as "tapping"), you’ll learn to live with more love; gain new clarity on your life, lessons, and blessings; and discover a new level of personal freedom, peace, and well-being. Forgiveness doesn’t mean agreeing with, condoning, or even liking what has happened. Forgiveness means letting go and knowing that—regardless of how challenging, frightening, or difficult an experience may seem—everything is just as it needs to be in order for you to grow and learn. When you focus on how things "should" be, you deny the presence and power of love. Accept the events of the past, while being willing to change your perspective on them. As Iyanla says, "Only forgiveness can liberate minds and hearts once held captive by anger, bitterness, resentment, and fear. Forgiveness is a true path to freedom that can renew faith, build trust, and nourish the soul."

In Practicing Forgiveness, the author reviews the contextual and cultural aspects of forgiveness with stories, humor, clinical examples, research, and empirical findings while examining the influence of environment and religion. The content is presented in such a way so as to serve as a resource to both professional mental health providers (who can benefit from the theoretical and empirical underpinnings of working with clients through the forgivenessprocess) and lay readers (who can benefit from the processing and self-help components of the book).

The Path to Forgiveness Study Guide is designed as a companion to the book, The Path to Forgiveness, to help you look deeper into the forgiveness process and find the peace and healing you need from interpersonal conflict and pain. In addition to the quotes, narratives, reflection questions, and affirmations in the book, this study guide also incorporates biblical references and thoughtful questions for further application and insight. You can use this study guide, along with The Path to Forgiveness, at a pace that is comfortable to you so that you can move forward from the unjust suffering you have experienced. This study guide can also be used in small groups to lead you and others down the path to forgiveness over a forty-day or eight-week period as you seek to restore meaning and direction to your life.