From Lonely To Single

“Why am I still single?” If you’re single and searching, there’s no end to other people’s explanations, excuses, and criticism explaining why you haven’t found a partner: “You’re too picky. Just find a good-enough guy and you’ll be fine.” “You’re too desperate. If men think you need them, they’ll run scared.” “You’re too independent. Smart, ambitious women always have a harder time finding mates.” “You have low self-esteem. You can’t love someone else until you’ve learned to love yourself.” “You’re too needy. You can’t be happy in a relationship until you’ve learned to be happy on your own.” Based on one of the most popular Modern Love columns of the last decade, Sara Eckel’s It’s Not You challenges these myths, encouraging singletons to stop picking apart their personalities and to start tapping into their own wisdom about who and what is right for them. Supported by the latest psychological and sociological research, as well as interviews with people who have experienced longtime singledom, Eckel creates a strong and empowering argument to understand and accept that there’s no one reason why you’re single—you just are.

Are you a single adult who sometimes feels isolated, vulnerable, and alone? Like everyone else you want to be known and understood; you don’t want to feel invisible. You want to be included and cared about. You don’t want to be lonely; you want to be connected to someone. So how do you find the intimacy and relationship you desire? ...

People who are single are changing the face of America. Did you know that: * More than 40 percent of the nation's adults---over 87 million people---are divorced, widowed, or have always been single. * There are more households comprised of single people living alone than of married parents and their children. * Americans now spend more of their adult years single than married. Many of today's single people have engaging jobs, homes that they own, and a network of friends. This is not the 1950s---singles can have sex without marrying, and they can raise smart, successful, and happy children. It should be a great time to be single. Yet too often single people are still asked to defend their single status by an onslaught of judgmental peers and fretful relatives. Prominent people in politics, the popular press, and the intelligentsia have all taken turns peddling myths about marriage and singlehood. Marry, they promise, and you will live a long, happy, and healthy life, and you will never be lonely again. Drawing from decades of scientific research and stacks of stories from the front lines of singlehood, Bella DePaulo debunks the myths of singledom---and shows that just about everything you've heard about the benefits of getting married and the perils of staying single are grossly exaggerated or just plain wrong. Although singles are singled out for unfair treatment by the workplace, the marketplace, and the federal tax structure, they are not simply victims of this singlism. Single people really are living happily ever after. Filled with bracing bursts of truth and dazzling dashes of humor, Singled Out is a spirited and provocative read for the single, the married, and everyone in between. You will never think about singlehood or marriage the same way again. Singled Out debunks the Ten Myths of Singlehood, including: Myth #1: The Wonder of Couples: Marrieds know best. Myth #3: The Dark Aura of Singlehood: You are miserable and lonely and your life is tragic. Myth #5: Attention, Single Women: Your work won't love you back and your eggs will dry up. Also, you don't get any and you're promiscuous. Myth #6: Attention, Single Men: You are horny, slovenly, and irresponsible, and you are the scary criminals. Or you are sexy, fastidious, frivolous, and gay. Myth #7: Attention, Single Parents: Your kids are doomed. Myth #9: Poor Soul: You will grow old alone and you will die in a room by yourself where no one will find you for weeks. Myth #10: Family Values: Let's give all of the perks, benefits, gifts, and cash to couples and call it family values. "With elegant analysis, wonderfully detailed examples, and clear and witty prose, DePaulo lays out the many, often subtle denigrations and discriminations faced by single adults in the U.S. She addresses, too, the resilience of single women and men in the face of such singlism. A must-read for all single adults, their friends and families, as well as social scientists and policy advocates." ---E. Kay Trimberger, author of The New Single Woman

A stressful, protracted divorce. A difficult, painful death of a beloved husband. And suddenly, after age 50, you’re on your own again. Your children have moved out, your parents are aging fast or deceased, your friends’ lives continue onward, seemingly unchanged. Being suddenly single after age 50 can be terrifying, but eventually it can also be liberating. It can be fraught with worry and decisions you’re unprepared initially to make, but it can also be a time to reevaluate, reestablish, and reinvent. It can be financially and emotionally unstable at times, but it can be the start of a new chapter, or the discovery of someone you didn’t know you were, or could become, after the grief of a loss so difficult. Long-time friends and authors Barbara Ballinger and Margaret Crane have a lot in common. Both lived in the same city for years. Both are writers. Both married their husbands right out of college. Both are mothers of grown children who have left home. And both had aging parents when these difficult journeys began. Both found themselves alone, husbands lost to divorce and death, two separate situations that were equally traumatic— for Barbara, a divorce that took four years to end, and for Margaret, a five-year, gut-wrenching siege of myriad cancers that ended in death. Barbara and Margaret struggled but discovered not only that their new lives were, indeed, worth living, but that the insight gleaned from their experiences could help other people in similar straits. The result is Suddenly Single After 50, an honest and riveting, yet funny and poignant guide that provides advice for those who find themselves divorced, widowed, or otherwise suddenly single just about the time they start getting those AARP cards in the mail and while many of their friends are gleefully discussing retirement plans and toasting milestone wedding anniversaries. Suddenly Single After 50 is told with authenticity, wit, and compassion. They discuss living alone, attending social events alone, eating by themselves, sleeping alone, walking and traveling alone, then how they also came to feel they were not alone, not really, with loyal friends and family. They share how their once right-sized houses suddenly felt empty, too big, and too full of stuff that no longer made sense. They write about all the legal and accounting woes that befell them. And they tell readers what it’s like to be over 50 and dating again—after decades out of that scene, which had changed in unfathomable yet often hilarious ways. Suddenly Single After 50 addresses what life is really like when it’s suddenly shaped as single. It helps readers understand the grief, frustration, and sadness alongside reawakening into the world. Anyone who finds themselves suddenly single in middle age and beyond--or knows someone who is--will find in these pages both advice and reflection, support, and a way forward.

Single, less stressed, and free If you’re tired of swiping through dating apps, ghosting, and hearing well-meaning questions about why you’re still single, it’s hard not to feel “less-than” because you haven’t found your soul mate. Until now. How to Be Single and Happy is an empowering, compassionate guide to stop overanalyzing romantic encounters, get over regrets or guilt about past relationships, and identify what you want and need in a partner. But this isn’t just another dating book. Drawing on her extensive expertise as a clinical psychologist, as well as the latest research, hundreds of patient interviews, and key principles in positive psychology, Dr. Jennifer Taitz challenges the most common myths about women and love (like the advice to play hard to get). And while she teaches how to skillfully date, she’ll also help you cultivate the mindset, values, and connections that ensure you’ll live your best, happiest life, whether single or coupled up.

Explores the philosophical notion of love, and argues that love is more complex than conventional thought would have us believe.

From a celebrity author who really walks the walk, Living Alone and Loving It is at once a celebration of living alone in a society that exalts marriage and family, and a prescriptive guide that shows the reader how truly to relish a life that does not include a partner. After a relationship impasse, Barbara Feldon—universally known as the effervescent spy "99" on Get Smart—found herself living alone. Little did she know that this time would become one of the most enriching and joyous periods of her life. Now Feldon shares her secrets for living alone and loving it. Prescribing antidotes for loneliness, salves for fears, and answers for just about every question that arises in an unpartnered day, she covers both the practical and emotional aspects of the solo life, including how to: -Stop imagining that marriage is a solution for loneliness -Nurture a glowing self-image that is not dependent on an admirer -Value connections that might be overlooked -Develop your creative side -End negative thinking Whether you are blessed with the promise of youth or the wisdom of age, Living Alone & Loving It will instill the know-how to forge a life with few maps and many adventures.

From the Sunday Times bestselling author 'This refreshing, unusual book needs to exist. A culture shift which repositions a single person as someone who is relationship-free, complete, and not lacking is long overdue.' - The i 'Absolutely f*cking brilliant' - Florence Given Having a secret single freak-out? Feeling the red, heart-shaped urgency intensify as the years roll on by? Oh hi! You're in the right place. Over half of Brits aged 25-44 are now single. It's become the norm to remain solo until much later in life, given the average marriage ages of 35 (women) and 38 (men). Many of us are choosing never to marry at all. But society, films, song lyrics and our parents are adamant that a happy ending has to be couple-shaped. That we're incomplete without an 'other half'*, like a bisected panto pony. Cue: single sorrow. Dating like it's a job. Spending half our lives waiting for somebody-we-fancy to text us back. Feeling haunted by the terms 'spinster' or 'confirmed bachelor.' Catherine Gray took a whole year off dating to find single satisfaction. She lifted the lid on the reasons behind the global single revolution, explored the bizarre ways cultures single-shame, detached from 'all the good ones are gone!' panic and debunked the myth that married people are much happier. Let's start the reverse brainwash, in order to locate - and luxuriate in - single happiness. Are you in? *Spoiler: you're already whole PRAISE FOR CATHERINE GRAY'S WRITING: "Fascinating." - Bryony Gordon "Not remotely preachy." - The Times "Jaunty, shrewd and convincing." - The Telegraph "Admirably honest, light, bubbly and remarkably rarely annoying." - The Guardian "Truthful, modern and real." - Stylist "Brave, witty and brilliantly written." - Marie Claire "Haunting, admirable and enlightening." - The Pool