Grief A Mama S Unwanted Journey

Grief: A Mama's Unwanted Journey is not for those looking for pat answers, quick fixes, or easy solutions to work through, but for those on the journey through the sting of death. It is also for those who may one day walk arm in arm with another down this horrible road, facing grief's raw and searing pain. "Great grief is a ferocious fire. It can be a destroying or a refining fire-or both at once. This book combines searing honesty with wisdom and consolation. Most importantly, it offers realistic hope that while grief and suffering are real words-about the lost one and those who have lost-they do not have to be the defining or final words. That final word is love, something that even suffering does not erase." -Daniel Taylor, author of The Skeptical Believer "'We cannot walk out of the cemetery and into life as we knew it. We must take time to grieve.' So says my friend Shelley, who knows the path to her son's grave well. If you are tired of platitudes, tired of the trite but untrue, this book is for you, as real and raw as it gets. Grieving moms, walk with her, learn from her successes and her mistakes, and hold her hand on the unwanted journey in the storm-tossed life-boat of grief. She will guide you safely back to sanity's shore." -Dane Skelton, pastor of Faith Community Church and author of Jungle Flight: Spiritual Adventures at the Ends of the Earth

Grief: A Mamas Unwanted Journey is not for those looking for pat answers, quick fixes, or easy solutions to work through, but for those on the journey through the sting of death. It is also for those who may one day walk arm in arm with another down this horrible road, facing griefs raw and searing pain. Great grief is a ferocious fire. It can be a destroying or a refining fireor both at once. This book combines searing honesty with wisdom and consolation. Most importantly, it offers realistic hope that while grief and suffering are real wordsabout the lost one and those who have lostthey do not have to be the defining or final words. That final word is love, something that even suffering does not erase. Daniel Taylor, author of The Skeptical Believer We cannot walk out of the cemetery and into life as we knew it. We must take time to grieve. So says my friend Shelley, who knows the path to her sons grave well. If you are tired of platitudes, tired of the trite but untrue, this book is for you, as real and raw as it gets. Grieving moms, walk with her, learn from her successes and her mistakes, and hold her hand on the unwanted journey in the storm-tossed life-boat of grief. She will guide you safely back to sanitys shore. Dane Skelton, pastor of Faith Community Church and author of Jungle Flight: Spiritual Adventures at the Ends of the Earth

“If you have suffered great tragedy and struggle to connect with God in your grief and disappointment, When Tragedy Strikes was written for you” (Wayne Jacobsen, author of He Loves Me! Learning to Live in the Father’s Affection). After the death of a child, there is no closure. It is like learning how to live with an amputation—you are forever changed and need to learn how to live a new “normal.” There can be a feeling of desperation to find someone farther ahead on the path who can understand the crushing pain that makes you feel like you can’t even breathe at times. Laura Diehl was plunged into that place with the death of her daughter, and meets the deep need to connect with others who have experienced what cannot be put into words. When Tragedy Strikes is the raw account of her journey from deep darkness back into light and life, extending a hand of hope to those traveling on the path behind her, who need to rebuild their lives after the death of a child.

When a loved one dies we mourn our loss. We take comfort in the rituals that mark the passing, and we turn to those around us for support. But what happens when there is no closure, when a family member or a friend who may be still alive is lost to us nonetheless? How, for example, does the mother whose soldier son is missing in action, or the family of an Alzheimer's patient who is suffering from severe dementia, deal with the uncertainty surrounding this kind of loss? In this sensitive and lucid account, Pauline Boss explains that, all too often, those confronted with such ambiguous loss fluctuate between hope and hopelessness. Suffered too long, these emotions can deaden feeling and make it impossible for people to move on with their lives. Yet the central message of this book is that they can move on. Drawing on her research and clinical experience, Boss suggests strategies that can cushion the pain and help families come to terms with their grief. Her work features the heartening narratives of those who cope with ambiguous loss and manage to leave their sadness behind, including those who have lost family members to divorce, immigration, adoption, chronic mental illness, and brain injury. With its message of hope, this eloquent book offers guidance and understanding to those struggling to regain their lives. Table of Contents: 1. Frozen Grief 2. Leaving without Goodbye 3. Goodbye without Leaving 4. Mixed Emotions 5. Ups and Downs 6. The Family Gamble 7. The Turning Point 8. Making Sense out of Ambiguity 9. The Benefit of a Doubt Notes Acknowledgments Reviews of this book: You will find yourself thinking about the issues discussed in this book long after you put it down and perhaps wishing you had extra copies for friends and family members who might benefit from knowing that their sorrows are not unique...This book's value lies in its giving a name to a force many of us will confront--sadly, more than once--and providing personal stories based on 20 years of interviews and research. --Pamela Gerhardt, Washington Post Reviews of this book: A compassionate exploration of the effects of ambiguous loss and how those experiencing it handle this most devastating of losses ... Boss's approach is to encourage families to talk together, to reach a consensus about how to mourn that which has been lost and how to celebrate that which remains. Her simple stories of families doing just that contain lessons for all. Insightful, practical, and refreshingly free of psychobabble. --Kirkus Review Reviews of this book: Engagingly written and richly rewarding, this title presents what Boss has learned from many years of treating individuals and families suffering from uncertain or incomplete loss...The obvious depth of the author's understanding of sufferers of ambiguous loss and the facility with which she communicates that understanding make this a book to be recommended. --R. R. Cornellius, Choice Reviews of this book: Written for a wide readership, the concepts of ambiguous loss take immediate form through the many provocative examples and stories Boss includes, All readers will find stories with which they will relate...Sensitive, grounded and practical, this book should, in my estimation, be required reading for family practitioners. --Ted Bowman, Family Forum Reviews of this book: Dr. Boss describes [the] all-too-common phenomenon [of unresolved grief] as resulting from either of two circumstances: when the lost person is still physically present but emotionally absent or when the lost person is physically absent but still emotionally present. In addition to senility, physical presence but psychological absence may result, for example, when a person is suffering from a serious mental disorder like schizophrenia or depression or debilitating neurological damage from an accident or severe stroke, when a person abuses drugs or alcohol, when a child is autistic or when a spouse is a workaholic who is not really 'there' even when he or she is at home...Cases of physical absence with continuing psychological presence typically occur when a soldier is missing in action, when a child disappears and is not found, when a former lover or spouse is still very much missed, when a child 'loses' a parent to divorce or when people are separated from their loved ones by immigration...Professionals familiar with Dr. Boss's work emphasised that people suffering from ambiguous loss were not mentally ill, but were just stuck and needed help getting past the barrier or unresolved grief so that they could get on with their lives. --Asian Age Combining her talents as a compassionate family therapist and a creative researcher, Pauline Boss eloquently shows the many and complex ways that people can cope with the inevitable losses in contemporary family life. A wise book, and certain to become a classic. --Constance R. Ahrons, author of The Good Divorce A powerful and healing book. Families experiencing ambiguous loss will find strategies for seeing what aspects of their loved ones remain, and for understanding and grieving what they have lost. Pauline Boss offers us both insight and clarity. --Kathy Weingarten, Ph.D, The Family Institute of Cambridge, Harvard Medical School

Grief overload is what you feel when you experience too many significant losses all at once, in a relatively short period of time, or cumulatively. In addition to the deaths of loved ones, such losses can also include divorce, estrangement, illness, relocation, job changes, and more. Our minds and hearts have enough trouble coping with a single loss, so when the losses pile up, the grief often seems especially chaotic and defeating. The good news is that through intentional, active mourning, you can and will find your way back to hope and healing. This compassionate guide will show you how.

The death of your child breaks you. With some luck, you may be able to rebuild most of who you were before that loss so that you are not a complete stranger, even to yourself. Even then, you know that you will never be the same again. There will always be a piece of you missing, leaving you forever broken. With the loss of her son, Jeramie, to a car accident, author Daynabelle Anderson found this to be true of herself: a forever broken mom. She then had to decide whether to fight it and live her life, trying in vain to be whole again, only to punish herself over and over when her efforts resulted in failure. Or she could accept that this was who she was now--to allow herself to be broken and to forgive herself for it. She chose the latter, and now she chronicles her journey into that brokenness. This personal narrative offers one mother's story and her perspective on how to live with grief, intended for anyone who has lost a loved one and who feels pressured to move on.

This is one mother's experience of learning to live again following the accidental death of her 24 year old daughter Sara. Bereaved mothers understand one another like nobody else possibly could. The writer shares what was helpful to her and what was not, for those who may not of lost a child but love someone who has. The writer shares journal entries from 3 years of writing to her deceased daughter. Though she didn't realize it at the time, writing to her daughter in her journal was the beginning of Loralee finding her "new normal".

In this groundbreaking new work, David Kessler—an expert on grief and the coauthor with Elisabeth Kübler-Ross of the iconic On Grief and Grieving—journeys beyond the classic five stages to discover a sixth stage: meaning. In 1969, Elisabeth Kübler Ross first identified the stages of dying in her transformative book On Death and Dying. Decades later, she and David Kessler wrote the classic On Grief and Grieving, introducing the stages of grief with the same transformative pragmatism and compassion. Now, based on hard-earned personal experiences, as well as knowledge and wisdom earned through decades of work with the grieving, Kessler introduces a critical sixth stage. Many people look for “closure” after a loss. Kessler argues that it’s finding meaning beyond the stages of grief most of us are familiar with—denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance—that can transform grief into a more peaceful and hopeful experience. In this book, Kessler gives readers a roadmap to remembering those who have died with more love than pain; he shows us how to move forward in a way that honors our loved ones. Kessler’s insight is both professional and intensely personal. His journey with grief began when, as a child, he witnessed a mass shooting at the same time his mother was dying. For most of his life, Kessler taught physicians, nurses, counselors, police, and first responders about end of life, trauma, and grief, as well as leading talks and retreats for those experiencing grief. Despite his knowledge, his life was upended by the sudden death of his twenty-one-year-old son. How does the grief expert handle such a tragic loss? He knew he had to find a way through this unexpected, devastating loss, a way that would honor his son. That, ultimately, was the sixth state of grief—meaning. In Finding Meaning, Kessler shares the insights, collective wisdom, and powerful tools that will help those experiencing loss. Finding Meaning is a necessary addition to grief literature and a vital guide to healing from tremendous loss. This is an inspiring, deeply intelligent must-read for anyone looking to journey away from suffering, through loss, and towards meaning.