How To Raise An Adopted Child

This comprehensive guide provides specific parenting strategies for the growing number of people who adopt children over two years old. Parents learn to identify their child's needs, meet such challenges as aggressive behavior and attention deficit disorder, and create a sense of belonging.

Originally published in 1993, this classic piece of literature on adoption has revolutionised the way people think about adopted children. Nancy Verrier examines the life-long consequences of the 'primal wound' - the wound that is caused when a child is separated from its mother - for adopted people. Her argument is supported by thorough research in pre- and perinatal psychology, attachment, bonding and the effects of loss.

This invaluable guide answers hundreds of questions most often asked by parents, and offers vital information on physical and psychological development. With warmth, knowledge, and sensitivity, the authors tell parents what they need to know before, during, and after adoption.

Domestic or international? Baby or older child? A child with special needs? The number of decisions you will need to make when deciding to adopt can at times seem overwhelming. The Everything® Parent’s Guide to Raising Your Adopted Child offers all the information any potential or newly adoptive parent might need. Parenting expert and adoptive parent Corrie Lynne Player has interviewed hundreds of adoptive parents and presents a cross-section of age, ethnicity, and cultural backgrounds to help you make the most informed decisions. This essential guidebook is packed with reassuring advice on how to handle the most common issues, including: -Questions to ask before adopting -Bonding techniques for each age group—from newborn to teenager -Adopting children with physiological or psychological special needs -Adopting outside your ethnic group -Navigating international adoptions -Fielding difficult questions about your adopted child’s birth parents -Helping your adopted child cope with feelings of loss and abandonment With this book by your side, you will bond with your child for a lifetime!

Do you and your partner argue about the same things over and over again? Are you often confused about why your partner is so angry with you? Are things getting worse and worse even though you’ve tried everything you can think of to make them better? In this breakthrough guide to repairing romantic relationships, therapist and marriage researcher Dr. Stephen Betchen presents a powerful new explanation of what leads to this kind of escalating conflict in couples and how you can repair your relationship and find a whole new level of happiness. Based on his extensive experience as a couples’ therapist, Dr. Betchen has discovered that the prevailing idea that opposites attract is wrong. Instead, one of the strongest forces that attracts people to one another is that they share a hidden, inner conflict in their lives—an unconscious struggle within themselves that each of them developed growing up—which he calls a "master conflict." The fact that a couple shares a master conflict acts as an almost magnetic force of attraction, but, over time, master conflicts often begin to push a pair apart—many of the very things you most appreciated about each other start to grate on you, producing increasing hostility. The good news is that by identifying the master conflict that you share, you and your partner can take the steps to break the cycle of fighting and come to a new place of understanding and happiness in your relationship. Often, just the realization that you have this hidden conflict acts as a powerful cure, allowing you to appreciate each other once again and to be empathetic about the things that have been irritating you both. From his years of work with couples, Betchen has identified the nineteen most common master conflicts—such as getting your needs met vs. caretaking; giving vs. withholding; commitment vs. freedom; power vs. passivity—and for each he provides vivid stories of couples who have struggled with them, as well as simple tests that help you to: • Identify the core master conflict that is causing your relationship problems • Understand the origins of your conflict and how it drew you to your partner • Diagnose how the conflict is now pushing you apart • Come to new terms with the conflict to save your relationship As Dr. Betchen writes, knowledge of a master conflict is power, and Magnetic Partners is an empowering guide that will help you not only to identify and control your master conflict, but also to bring your relationship to a new level based on deeper understanding, ultimately leading to greater fulfillment and long-term resilience. Partners

“Howerton writes unflinchingly about what it means to be raising children in today’s world and how to liberate ourselves from the myth of perfect motherhood.”—Glennon Doyle, author of Untamed and Love Warrior, founder of Together Rising In this smart and subversively funny memoir, Kristen Howerton navigates the emotional and sometimes messy waters of motherhood and challenges the idea that there’s a “right” way to raise kids. Recounting her successes, trials, mishaps, and hard-won wisdom, this mother of four advocates for letting go of the expectations, the guilt, and the endless race to be the perfect parent to the perfect child in the perfect family. This book is for ● the parent who loves their kids like crazy but feels like parenting is making them crazy, too ● the parent who said “I will never . . .” and now they have ● the parent who looks like they have it all together but feels like a hot mess on the inside ● the parent who looks like a hot mess on the outside, too ● the parent who asks Am I good enough? Doing enough? Doing it right? What’s wrong with me? What’s wrong with these children? Are they eighteen yet? With her signature blend of vulnerability, sarcasm, and insight, Howerton shares her unexpected journey from infertility to adoption to pregnancy to divorce to dealing with the shock and awe of raising teens. As a mom of a multiracial family and as a marriage and family therapist, she tackles the thorny issues parents face today, like hard conversations about racism, disciplining other people’s kids, the reality of Dad Privilege, and (never) attaining that elusive work/life balance. Rage Against the Minivan is a permission slip to let it go and allow yourself to be a “good enough” parent, focused on raising happy, kind, loving humans.

In this completely revised and updated edition of Raising Adopted Children, Lois Melina, editor of Adopted Child newsletter and the mother of two children by adoption, draws on the latest research in psychology, sociology, and medicine to guide parents through all stages of their child's development. Melina addresses the pressing adoption issues of today, such as open adoption, international adoption, and transracial adoption, and answers parents' most frequently asked questions, such as: How will my child "bond" or form attachments to me? When and how should I tell my child that he was adopted? What should schools be told about my child? Will adoption make adolescent upheavals more complicated? Up-to-date, sensitive, and clear, Raising Adopted Children is the definitive resource for all adoptive parents and concerned professionals.

"Birthdays may be difficult for me." "I want you to take the initiative in opening conversations about my birth family." "When I act out my fears in obnoxious ways, please hang in there with me." "I am afraid you will abandon me." The voices of adopted children are poignant, questioning. And they tell a familiar story of loss, fear, and hope. This extraordinary book, written by a woman who was adopted herself, gives voice to children's unspoken concerns, and shows adoptive parents how to free their kids from feelings of fear, abandonment, and shame. With warmth and candor, Sherrie Eldridge reveals the twenty complex emotional issues you must understand to nurture the child you love--that he must grieve his loss now if he is to receive love fully in the future--that she needs honest information about her birth family no matter how painful the details may be--and that although he may choose to search for his birth family, he will always rely on you to be his parents. Filled with powerful insights from children, parents, and experts in the field, plus practical strategies and case histories that will ring true for every adoptive family, Twenty Things Adopted Kids Wish Their Adoptive Parents Knew is an invaluable guide to the complex emotions that take up residence within the heart of the adopted child--and within the adoptive home.