Indian Arranged Marriages

Despite the fact that more than 80% of cultures practice varying degrees of arranged marriage, scholars have thus far concentrated exclusively on American and European cultures from choice marriages, not yet fully exploring the psychology of arranged marriages. India is a prominent South Asian nation that continues to retain the historical tradition of arranged marriages in the 21st century. This book therefore provides a timely addition to marital research as it offers a comprehensive and systematic psychological examination on Indian arranged marriages. This book explores the role of individual, interactional, contextual, and cultural factors in predicting marital satisfaction in individuals who were in arranged marriages and living in India. The discussion is drawn from a survey collecting data from individuals married through the arranged marriage system in India. In light of this empirical study, the book considers the cross-cultural applicability of Western findings and proposes some key methodological and clinical considerations for examining marital relationships in Indian arranged marriages. Providing useful, much-needed scholarly insight on arranged marriages and widening the research conceptualization of marriage, this book will be of particular interest to scholars of Social Psychology, Sociology, Marital and Cross-cultural studies.

Learning to Love moves beyond the media and policy stereotypes that conflate arranged marriages with forced marriages. Using in-depth interviews and participant observations, this book assembles a rich and diverse array of everyday marriage narratives and trajectories and highlights how considerations of romantic love are woven into traditional arranged marriage practices. It shows that far from being a homogeneous tradition, arranged marriages involve a variety of different matchmaking practices where each family tailors its own cut-and-paste version of British-Indian arranged marriages to suit modern identities and ambitions. Pande argues that instead of being wedded to traditions, people in the British-Indian diaspora have skillfully adapted and negotiated arranged marriage cultural norms to carve out an identity narrative that portrays them as "modern and progressive migrants"–ones who are changing with the times and cultivating transnational forms of belonging.

If you’re an Indian woman and old enough to legally bear children, chances are that an overweight relative has asked you, while fondly stroking their pot belly, ‘When am I going to eat at your wedding?’ The modern Indian woman’s attitude to marriage―and especially to arranged marriage―is a confused one. As traditional matchmaking methods and internet chat rooms come together to build matrimonial websites, our parameters have changed, but the time-honoured practice of arranged marriage sticks. Hitched explores in depth the considerations matrimony should involve, and the issues that can crop up at different stages of an arranged marriage. A cross-section of women―those who married young, married late, married the first man their parents parked before them, or married out of caste in an arranged setup―open up about experiences ranging from the frightening to the hilarious and the awww-inspiring.

Based on in-depth interviews with urban, university educated men and women, the book lends an extensive exploration of individuals' intimate sex lives and their marital lives; merits and demerits of arranged marriages.

An affectionate, often hilarious, memoir of growing up in London in the 1970s in an Indian household, and avoiding an arranged marriage. ‘From the age of fourteen, I was aware my parents expected me to have an arranged marriage, a big Bollywood wedding. There was just one hitch: nobody asked me.’ For Sushi Das, growing up in 1970s London was a culturally messed-up time. Feminists were telling women they could be whatever they wanted, skinheads were yelling at dark-skinned foreigners to go home and The Boomtown Rats were singing about ‘Lookin’ after Number 1.’ While Sushi was fabricating intricate lies and plotting harebrained schemes to get to the pub and meet ‘undesirable elements’ – boys – her parents were on the hunt for a respectable Indian doctor for her to marry. But how do you turn your back on centuries of tradition without trashing your family’s honour? How do you break free of your parents’ stranglehold without casting off their embrace? And how do you explain to your strict dad why there’s a boy smoking in his living room and another one lurking in his garden? Breaking free meant migrating to the other side of the world, only to find that life in Australia had unexpected consequences. This is an intelligent, often hilarious memoir and a fascinating look at one of the oldest traditions of Eastern culture, which aims to join two families in economic prosperity, but whose reality is not always so blissful.

Hemdeep Singh knows exactly what he wants. With his intelligence and determination, he has what it takes to build his own legacy away from Bharat, Inc. and the empire his father created. But when his brother calls him home, Hem puts his dreams on hold once again to help save the company he walked away from. That’s when he encounters the devastating Mina Kohli in the Bharat boardroom, and he realizes he’s in for more than he had bargained. Mina will do whatever it takes to recover control of her mother’s law firm, even if it means agreeing to an arranged marriage. Her newest case assignment is to assist Bharat in the midst of a potential takeover. It could be the key to finally achieving her goal while preventing her marriage to a man she doesn’t love—as long as her explosive attraction to Hem doesn’t get in the way. As Mina and Hem work to save Bharat, they not only uncover secrets that could threaten the existence of the company, but they also learn that in a winner-takes-all game, love always comes out on top.

Winner of the Silver Nautilus Award for Journalism & Investigative Reporting "Elizabeth Flock takes us on an intimate cruise on the shifting sea of the heart, in the best book set in Bombay that I've read in years. Flock's total access to her characters, and her highly sympathetic and nonjudgmental gaze, prove that love and literature know no borders. Easily the most intimate account of India that I've read, and of value to anybody that believes in love and marriage."—Suketu Mehta, author of Maximum City "This remarkable debut is so deeply reported, elegantly written, and profoundly transporting that it reads like a novel you can’t put down. It’s both a nuanced and intimate evocation of Indian culture, and a provocative and exciting meditation on marriage itself."—Katie Roiphe, author of The Violet Hour In the vein of Behind the Beautiful Forevers, an intimate, deeply reported and revelatory examination of love, marriage, and the state of modern India—as witnessed through the lives of three very different couples in today’s Mumbai. In twenty-first-century India, tradition is colliding with Western culture, a clash that touches the lives of everyday Indians from the wealthiest to the poorest. While ethnicity, class, and religion are influencing the nation’s development, so too are pop culture and technology—an uneasy fusion whose impact is most evident in the institution of marriage. The Heart Is a Shifting Sea introduces three couples whose relationships illuminate these sweeping cultural shifts in dramatic ways: Veer and Maya, a forward-thinking professional couple whose union is tested by Maya’s desire for independence; Shahzad and Sabeena, whose desperation for a child becomes entwined with the changing face of Islam; and Ashok and Parvati, whose arranged marriage, made possible by an online matchmaker, blossoms into true love. Though these three middle-class couples are at different stages in their lives and come from diverse religious backgrounds, their stories build on one another to present a layered, nuanced, and fascinating mosaic of the universal challenges, possibilities, and promise of matrimony in its present state. Elizabeth Flock has observed the evolving state of India from inside Mumbai, its largest metropolis. She spent close to a decade getting to know these couples—listening to their stories and living in their homes, where she was privy to countless moments of marital joy, inevitable frustration, dramatic upheaval, and whispered confessions and secrets. The result is a phenomenal feat of reportage that is both an enthralling portrait of a nation in the midst of transition and an unforgettable look at the universal mysteries of love and marriage that connect us all.

Despite the fact that more than 80% of cultures practice varying degrees of arranged marriage, scholars have thus far concentrated exclusively on American and European cultures from choice marriages, not yet fully exploring the psychology of arranged marriages. India is a prominent South Asian nation that continues to retain the historical tradition of arranged marriages in the 21st century. This book therefore provides a timely addition to marital research as it offers a comprehensive and systematic psychological examination on Indian arranged marriages. This book explores the role of individual, interactional, contextual, and cultural factors in predicting marital satisfaction in individuals who were in arranged marriages and living in India. The discussion is drawn from a survey collecting data from individuals married through the arranged marriage system in India. In light of this empirical study, the book considers the cross-cultural applicability of Western findings and proposes some key methodological and clinical considerations for examining marital relationships in Indian arranged marriages. Providing useful, much-needed scholarly insight on arranged marriages and widening the research conceptualization of marriage, this book will be of particular interest to scholars of Social Psychology, Sociology, Marital and Cross-cultural studies.