Johnny Please Be Good

Johnny is a mischievous little fella. His intentions are good, but are often taken the wrong way. His way of doing things are sure to catch the eye of those around. It has always been said that the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. His mother, bless her heart, has her hands full. Unknowing to her, she is a story all of her own. Together they are like two peas in a pod. Amherst County will never be the same.

Johnny Spedolini, or as he is called affectionately, "Professor Speedo" or "Johnny Speedo," is a young man from Bensonhurst, Brooklyn, who becomes a well-loved teacher in the years of the sixties through the nineties, Johnny is a devoted Catholic Christian and loves his church; he happens also to be gay in a time and place when being gay is not only regarded as a mortal sin, but can, indeed, cost the gay person his or her life. Johnny is certainly pained by the fact of his homosexuality, but even more, he is angered by contemporary religion's attitude toward homosexuality. The story revolves around Johnny's sardonic and angry review of his world, his quixotic railing against injustice in the world and his desire to do good and be helpful to others in this imperfect world. Most of all, the story is about the treasured friendship between Johnny, his student and friend, Joey and Joey's lovely wife-to-be, Angela. The love story of these three seekers after truth constitutes the true heart of the story.

In the present volume, former school teacher-turned-hookey cop, Florence McGehee, chronicles her time as a truant officer in a fruit-growing area of California. In Please Excuse Johnny, McGehee details her many experiences with truants, their parents and home life, and juvenile delinquency.

Here within these pages lie a silver bullet between the eyes. A grim reminder clouds are only tombstones in the sky. In the graveyard of memories there are ghosts that still fly. Like vultures overhead waiting for dreams to die. Haunted by the questions that have no reply. Monuments with their stoney faces stand alone and cry. The Grim Reaper and Cupid in their coffin lie. Waiting to be resurrected by the readers who wonder why. I expect the unexpected to catch you by surprse.

Read and enjoy this love story, which is uniquely worded unlike any other love story. It is a must-read story filled with humor and passion.

A massive collection of laugh-out-loud jokes—arranged A-to-Z by subject! •Did you hear about the flasher who was thinking of retiring? He finally decided to stick it out for one more year! •A dog with three legs walks into a Wild West bar and says, “I’m looking for the man who shot my paw.” •Where do you get virgin wool from? An ugly sheep! •What did the blonde say when she looked into a box of Cheerios? “Oh look! Donut seeds!” •The police have reported the theft of a shipment of filing cabinets, document folders, and labeling machines—it’s believed to have been the work of organized crime. Keep yourself—and friends and family—laughing with a new joke every day. This book is packed full of thousands of jokes, alphabetically organized into hundreds of topics from accountants to zebras, providing one gigantic, over-the-top, laugh-out-loud collection.