Law And Disorder Absurdly Funny Moments From The Courts

More hilarious, unbelievable-but-true stories from our nation’s courts, from the author of Disorder in the Court and Disorderly Conduct. Charles M. Sevilla finds comic gems in court transcripts—and now brings readers a delightful, all-new collection. Starting with a chapter on the defendants (one of whom, when asked his marital status, replies after a long pause, "Adequate") and following with sections on lawyers, experts, witnesses, evidence, and even one called "Malaprops" (DA: The status of the boat has no relevance to this case at all. This is a total fishing expedition). Stories from Sevilla's previous books have become viral Internet sensations, priming readers for more legal disorder, such as: Clerk: Do you solemnly swear that the testimony you are about to given in the cause now pending before this court shall be the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help you God? Witness: Yes, I swear. I’ll say anything but the truth, nothing but the truth.

The most clever, sidesplitting collection of lawyer jokes . . . bar none.

The quotes contained in this book are things real people actually said, word for word, under oath in legal court proceedings and are forever immortalized in the public record. This fully illustrated, cartoon panel book brings these humorous quotes to life! It is true that lawyers and witnesses say the darndest things! Please enjoy a good laugh at their expense.

In America's courtooms, the verdict is laughter. Sit back and enjoy a collection of verbatim exchanges from the halls of justice, where defendants and plaintiffs, lawyers and witnesses, juries and judges, collide to produce memorably insane comedy. A: You mumbled on the first part of that and I couldn't understand what you were saying. Could you repeat the question? Q: I mumbled, did I? Well, we'll just ask the court reporter to read back what I said. She didn't indicate any problem understanding what I said, so obviously she understood every word. We'll just have her read my question back and find out if there was any mumbling going on. Madam reporter, would you be so kind? Court Reporter: Mumble, mumble, mumble, mumble, mumble.

A lighthearted, inspiring, and timely look at the daily challenges and triumphs nurses face—all while reminding nurses exactly why they continue to work on the frontline. Being a nurse is not an easy task. From the endless hours battling COVID-19 to an often-times stressful work environment to those delightful patients who always insist they somehow know more than the medical professionals helping them—RNs everywhere know the struggle. What It Means to Be a Nurse takes an amusing look at some of the challenges these medical professionals face on a daily basis. Adding a laugh-out-loud spin that is both entertaining and relatable, this must-have book reminds nurses exactly why they love their hospitals, doctors, and patients, even on the tough days. With a heaping helping of humor and love, this book shares the inspiring and heartwarming stories that show us all why nurses are our heroes.

This assortment of unintentionally amusing courtroom exchanges ranges from the testimony of expert witnesses to jury selection to cross examination to creative defense, closing argument, and sentencing -- a rollicking guide to America's legal system.

A collection of 200 color photos culled from the popular Facebook group, this hilarious work features outrageous grammatical, spelling, and usage mistakes from around the world.