Midlife Orphan

This thoughtful exploration of a neglected subject explains the emotional impact of losing parents in the midst of midlife--and why many underestimate it.

From Child to Elder explores the personal growth that can arise when a middle-aged adult loses his or her last living parent. Based on an empirical phenomenological study, this book details the complex ways in which the adult orphan's ongoing relationship to the deceased parents, combined with the unique meanings of the loss, leads to a deepening of individual autonomy and spiritual awakening. Confrontation with mortality and fundamental aloneness promotes, among other things, an increased sense of existential responsibility toward self and others as the adult orphan psychologically assumes its new role as an elder. These and many other themes are structured into an integrated whole and amplified through developmental, existential, and Jungian perspectives. The result is a compelling portrait of the processes by which the death of one's parents can accelerate psychospiritual development.

Counseling Across the Lifespan expands the perimeters of counseling with its emphasis on preventive techniques for adjustment problems in the lifespan of a normal individual. This cogent work focuses on counseling intervention strategies from the unique perspective of an individual’s lifespan, placing techniques in the proper development context. By concentrating on life stages—from childhood through old age—the authors identify the nature and origin of various psychological issues such as self-identity and healthy lifestyle development in adolescents, family violence in young adults, or retirement transitions for older adults. The intervention tools needed to confront these issues are presented through succinct pedagogical features including case examples, checklists for evaluating clients, and exercises.

The complete guide for managing the financial, legal, and emotional issues of inheritances large and small. A death in the family is never easy, but receiving an inheritance, whether expected or not, can leave heirs feeling overwhelmed and even guilty at this change in their fortunes. Ann Perry’s insightful examination of the challenges make managing a bequest a little easier. Combining her practical know-how as a personal finance writer, the expertise of financial advisors, attorneys, and psychologists, and the wisdom gained from her personal inheritance experience, Perry deftly deals with such touchy subjects as selling the family homestead, divvying up property in “blended families,” parceling out heirlooms, dividing a family business, and sharing—or not sharing—an inheritance with a spouse. With refreshing candor, Perry addresses the guilt, grief, and unrealistic fantasies that can keep heirs from making the most of their windfalls, and also explores the unique, even life-changing, opportunities that a bequest can present. An excellent tool for estate planning, as well, this is essential reading for those who are writing their wills as well as those who are remembered in one.

A therapist and expert on grief is faced with the slow decline of her beloved mother. She imparts to the reader lessons learned, both personal and professional, in anticipating grief and the loss of a loved one. 'This is a unique book by a professional who understands the field of loss and grief ... Poignantly heartbreaking.' - Melba Vasquez, President, American Psychology Association's Division on Counseling Psychology.

DEATH, AMERICAN STYLE: A CULTURAL HISTORY OF DYING IN AMERICA is the first comprehensive cultural history to explore America’s uneasy relationship with death over the past century.

In this new approach to understanding the impact of grief, Susan A. Berger goes beyond the commonly held theories of stages of grief with a new typology for self-awareness and personal growth. She offers practical advice for healing from a major loss in this presentation of five basic ways, or types, of grieving. These five types describe how different people respond to a major loss. The types are: • Nomads, who have not yet resolved their grief and don’t often understand how their loss has affected their lives • Memorialists, who are committed to preserving the memory of their loved ones by creating concrete memorials and rituals to honor them • Normalizers, who are committed to re-creating a sense of family and community • Activists, who focus on helping other people who are dealing with the same disease or issues that caused their loved one’s death • Seekers, who adopt religious, philosophical, or spiritual beliefs to create meaning in their lives Drawing on research results and anecdotes from working with the bereaved over the past ten years, Berger examines how a person’s worldview is affected after a major loss. According to her findings, people experience significant changes in their sense of mortality, their values and priorities, their perception of and orientation toward time, and the manner in which they "fit" in society. The five types of grieving, she finds, reflect the choices people make in their efforts to adapt to dramatic life changes. By identifying with one of the types, readers who have suffered a recent loss—or whose lives have been shaped by an early loss—find ways of understanding the impact of the loss and of living more fully.

After Peggy Edwards, Miroslava Lhotsky, and Judy Turner published their highly successful first book, The Healthy Boomer: A No-Nonsense Guide to Midlife Health for Women and Men, they embarked on a series of workshops with health professionals and men and women in midlife. Like them, the participants often found it almost impossible to juggle the responsibilities of midlife and still find time and energy for themselves. Translating the principles of balance and good health into daily action is difficult, and the authors knew from their seminars that participants were always pleased to hear stories of struggle and success from others. It made sense, they concluded, to ask Boomers themselves the best ways to manage midlife. To get a sense of common issues in midlife and possible coping strategies, they sent out a questionnaire and conducted telephone interviews to draw out more in-depth ideas. The results are found in this book, a collection of anecdotes, quotes, and wisdom from Boomers themselves. In midlife, we start to get in touch with the fact that our time on earth will not last forever and is precious. This book provides a variety of ways of looking at this fact and of thinking about the choices ahead. There are motivating stories from Boomers (some, such as Pamela Wallin, known to many), brief updates from the scientific world, and interesting tidbits of information from the survey.