The Intimacy Paradox

Although most people physically leave home by their early 20s, emotional separation from one's family is a more difficult process that can continue for a lifetime. Now available in paper for the first time, this acclaimed book addresses the struggle of adults to establish autonomy without sacrificing family connections. Donald S. Williamson presents personal authority therapy, an approach designed to simultaneously foster individual development and family-of-origin intimacy. Therapists are taken step by step through conducting individual, couple, and small group sessions that culminate in several sessions with each client and his or her parents. Writing with sensitivity and humor, the author demonstrates effective ways to help adult children construct new personal and family narratives, resolve intergenerational intimidation, and enjoy healthier, more equal relationships with parents and significant others.

LOVE/SEX/MARRIAGE

The hope for intimacy lies deep within us all. That moment of feeling uniquely understood, the antidote to isolation, is what gives us value, validation and self-belief. But as Ziyad Marar shows in this fascinating and engaging study, intimacy is a tricky business. The prevalence of social media, for example, is a sign of our desire for human connection, yet is a symptom of how little we truly achieve it. Often confused with love, intimacy is in many ways more important. Marar's investigation and celebration of this elusive but profound human experience shows how intimacy is central to a life well lived. But how do we spot the real thing? Marar helpfully identifies a key set of ingredients - reciprocity, conspiracy, heightened emotion, kindness - that when brought together enable the strongest experiences of intimacy. Without these four characteristics in the mix we are experiencing something less, or something else. Drawing on a wide range of sources - from key thinkers, as well as telling examples from familiar films and novels - Marar illustrates the subtlety and intricacies of intimacy and shows how closely it is bound up with notions of trust, control, risk and our own insecurities. Intimacy, argues Marar, is a necessary component of a fulfilled life. Yet we should not take for granted that we know what it is and how to get it. A better understanding of this powerful experience and the many barriers to achieving it may just help us to brave the search for it. For anyone bold enough to do so, which should be all of us, Intimacy is required reading.

When you love someone, how does it feel? And when you desire someone, how is it different? In Mating in Captivity, Esther Perel looks at the story of sex in committed couples. Modern romance promises it all - a lifetime of togetherness, intimacy and erotic desire. In reality, it's hard to want what you already have. Our quest for secure love conflicts with our pursuit of passion. And often, the very thing that got us to into our relationships - lust - is the one thing that goes missing from them. Determined to reconcile the erotic and the domestic, Perel explains why democracy is a passion killer in the bedroom. Argues for playfulness, distance, and uncertainty. And shows what it takes to bring lust home. Smart, sexy and explosively original, Mating in Captivity is the monogamist's essential bedside read.

"What happened to the passion we started with? Why aren't we as close as we used to be?" PROBLEM: If you are a woman who is unfulfilled in your marriage...if you feel unheard or overburdened...if you quietly live in a state of slow-burn resentment... PROBLEM: If you are a man unhappy that your partner seems so unhappy with you...if you feel bewildered, unappreciated, or betrayed... This book offers a solution Bestselling author and nationally renowned therapist Terrence Real unearths the causes of communication blocks between men and women in this groundbreaking work. Relationships are in trouble; the demand for intimacy today must be met with new skills, and Real -- drawing on his pioneering work on male depression -- gives both men and women those skills, empowering women and connecting men, radically reversing the attitudes and emotional stumbling blocks of the patriarchal culture in which we were raised. Filled with powerful stories of the couples Real treats, no other relationship book is as straight talking or compelling in its innovative approach to healing wounds and reconnecting partners with a new strength and understanding.

The passion paradox is the catch-22 of romantic relationships: the more deeply one partner falls in love, the more distant the other becomes. Now renowned psychologist Delis shows how to change these patterns and offers powerful, proven techniques to help couples rekindle romance and discover a new equilibrium of love and desire for a lifetime of happiness.

This book conceptualises the lived experience of intimacy in a world in which the terms and conditions of love and friendship are increasingly unclear. It shows that the analysis of the 'small world' of dyads can give important clues about society and its gendered makeup.

Incorporating the most up-to-date literature in sociology, psychoanalysis, psychology, and communication, this book provides an exhaustive synthesis of theoretical, empirical, and clinical research on personal relationships. Prager explores the complex interconnections between intimacy and individual development, examining relationships from intimacy to old age in their social, cultural, and gender contexts, and constructing an innovative, multi-tiered model of intimate relating. The book also delves into the thoughts and emotions people experience when they behave intimately with each other, and asks how intimate relationships come to be satisfying, stable and harmonious for the people involved. This book will be of interest to researchers, educators, students and practitioners who study or treat close relationships. It will also serve as an invaluable text for advanced undergraduate and graduate courses on personal relationships, intimacy, and family relations.