The Mammoth Book Of Limericks

This is the best-ever collection of those catchy Irish rhymes – from squeaky-clean to the moderately filthy. With over 2,000 silly, political, modern, classic, and more to choose from, there is bound to be a limerick to get you giggling. This giant collection includes Irish classics called out in corner pubs for decades as well as many new verses specifically created to be read here. Creators include Spike Milligan, Mark Twain, Michael Palin, Lewis Carroll, Isaac Asimov, Robert Louis Stevenson, Rudyard Kipling, W.H. Auden, and many, many more.

This hilariously inappropriate collection of rhymes is sure to provide ammunition to use at the office or even at a party among friends. You'll never have to repeat a line from this collection of more than 2,000 dirty verses. Perfect for St. Patty's Day or any time year-round!

The most enduringly popular poetical verse form in the English language is very much alive and well. This monster volume of 2,000 limericks ranges from clean to (moderately) filthy, all guaranteed to make you laugh! It contains limericks that are historical, geographical, whimsical, clerical, medical and many more. This giant collection includes limericks by such names as Edward Lear, Isaac Asimov, Robert Louis Stevenson, Rudyard Kipling, William Shakespeare, H.G. Wells, John Betjeman, Ogden Nash, Spike Milligan, and others. As well as a treasure trove of completely new and original verse, generated specially for this volume. You'll find plenty of modern gems - limericks relevant to today's world, such as computers, mobile phones, foreign travel, traffic congestion, unfair taxation, the cult of celebrity, overpaid sports players, environmental issues. Plus 'old favourites' in every category you can think of, including: Limerick limericks, Family, Children's limericks (for children and by children), Food and Drink, Sporty, Clever (including tongue twisters), Silly, Arty, Animal, Showbiz (including theatre, film and TV), Musical, Medical, Historical, Miscellaneous (including royalty, travel, occupations, college, crime, fashion, politics, celebrity, garden and religion), Memorial, Naughty, and Naughtier.

More than 10,000 stories and jokes, limericks and one-liners, put-downs and puns in the ultimate, most comprehensive compendium of humor ever compiled. From boners and groaners to classic shaggy-dog stories and jokes for roasts and toasts, virtually every form of verbal humor on a whole raft of topics is represented in this not totally politically correct but always devilishly diverting collection of ticklers and howlers for any occasion. Humorous quotations, epigrams and epitaphs, newspaper misprints, misleading headlines ("MAGISTRATES MAY ACT ON INDECENT SHOWS"), limericks, puns, and the darnedest things said by kids ("a fjord is a Scandinavian car") also appear among the volume's ten thousand entries, which are arranged by category and fully indexed by subject. This format makes the book an easily accessible as well as invaluable companion to speech-makers for events great and small. So it is that The Mammoth Book of Humor meets the needs of both the maiden aunt looking for a wholesome joke to relate at a golden wedding anniversary and the best man who needs a blue one for the bachelor party. The volume even offers would-be wolves on the prowl pick-up lines-at the same time that it provides some snappy comebacks and a few ribald ripostes for the reluctant or disinterested prey. Waggish, witty, wisecracking, or whimsical, the humor is as various as it is vigorous on every page of this endlessly entertaining collection.

If you've ever wondered what happened to the young fellow from Malta who bought his grandfather an altar... If you're concerned about the camper called Jack who found a huge snake in his pack... And if you suspect that an eccentric landowner called Grey spent Christmas a very strange way but aren't sure precisely what that entailed... Then a dip into Michael Palin's Sackful of Limericks will provide all the answers – and a lot of fun besides.

A collection of poems about animals, school, wacky inventions, foods, and computers.

Writing very bad poetry requires talent. It helps to have a wooden ear for words, a penchant for sinking into a mire of sentimentality, and an enviable confidence that allows one to write despite absolutely appalling incompetence. The 131 poems collected in this first-of-its-kind anthology are so glaringly awful that they embody a kind of genius. From Fred Emerson Brooks' "The Stuttering Lover" to Matthew Green's "The Spleen" to Georgia Bailey Parrington's misguided "An Elegy to a Dissected Puppy", they mangle meter, run rampant over rhyme, and bludgeon us into insensibility with their grandiosity, anticlimax, and malapropism. Guaranteed to move even the most stoic reader to tears (of laughter), Very Bad Poetry is sure to become a favorite of the poetically inclined (and disinclined).

A collection of odes, fables, stories, limericks, songs, nursery rhymes on cats drawing on sources from all periods of history, worldwide. It includes every aspect of the subject from myths and legends, queens and kittens, the domestic tiger, the fireside sphinx, Old Deuteronomy, the Witch's familiar, Krazy Cats, Felix D'or and In Memoriam.