The Treasure Of Humorous Quotations

This hilarious collection of humorous quotations, full of wisecracks and wit, snappy comments and inspired fantasy, has been specially compiled by the late broadcaster and raconteur Ned Sherrin, with a foreword by leading British satirist, Alistair Beaton. Now packed with even more quotes and covering more subjects than before, from Weddings to the Supernatural, Australia to Headlines. Find the best lines from your favourite jokesters and wordsmiths, add that extra something to a speech or presentation, or just enjoy a good laugh. 'A chair is a piece of furniture. I am not a chair because no one has ever sat on me.' Ann Widdecombe on the announcement that Parliamentary language will now be gender-neutral. 'No wonder Bob Geldof is such an expert on famine. He's been feeding off 'I don't like Mondays' for 30 years.' Russell Brand On deciding to run for governor of California: 'The most difficult decision I've ever made in my entire life, except for the one in 1978 when I decided to get a bikini wax.' Arnold Schwarzenegger 'Wanting to know an author because you like his work is like wanting to know a duck because you like p--acirc--;t--eacute--;.' Margaret Atwood 'I am so sorry. We have to stop there. I have just come to the end of my personality.' Quentin Crisp, closing down an interview

Public speakers are sometimes stumped for a pithy or relevant humorous quote for a speech they are to give. This book contains hundreds of such quotes on many topics to assist them. This book is also appropriate for those just interested in reading a collection of easy-to-read humorous quotations.

This entertaining book presents hundreds of humorous jokes, quotations, and one-liners compiled from a variety of sources (medical literature, books, magazines, the internet, movies, television, remarks made at conferences or rounds, lectures, comic routines). The text is organized alphabetically allowing readers to browse through the book randomly, or focus on particular topics of interest. Sample subject headings include Academia, Aphorisms, Atrophy, Bedside Manner, Beepers, Case Reports, Chicken Soup, Dieting, Epitaphs, Fatigue, Health Food, Insanity, Jogging, Lab Tests, Lawyers, Middle Age, Motherhood, Night Calls, Obesity, Phobias, Quacks, Retirement, Snoring, Teenagers, Turfing, Ulcers, Vacations, Wellness, Zoonoses. There is cross-referencing throughout the book for easy location of additional topics of interest. Offers nuggets of wisdom within humorous one-liners Provides a quick laugh or pick-me-up at the end of a busy day Helps promote better communication among colleagues, students, and patients Material in this book can be used during lectures and hospital rounds, conferences, with office staff, and by speakers who need funny lines to spice up their presentations to medical professionals

From Oscar Wilde's witty observation in Lady Windermere's Fan that 'I can resist everything except temptation', to Zsa Zsa Gabor's admission that 'I know nothing about sex, because I was always married', and by way of Woody Allen's numerous bon mots to the anonymous definition of psychiatry as being 'the care of the id by the odd', Connie Robertson has woven together a hilarious, stimulating and thought-provoking collection of the best humorous quotations which will provide the reader with much to ponder over long after the book has been put aside.The Wordsworth Book of Humorous Quotations will delight the browser and the simply curious while also providing the student, journalist and after-dinner speaker with a wealth of valuable material.

Pearls of wisdom and downright funny lines are bountiful in Dick Enberg's Humorous Quotes for All Occasions. Public speaking tops the list of things people fear most--above fear of snakes, falling, or even death. But Dick Enberg has the antidote. With 28 general subjects to choose from, you're bound to find just the right line to loosen your tongue and break the ice on any occasion. As baby boomers increasingly are faced with occasion for public speaking--graduations, weddings, retirement parties, anniversaries of all sorts--Dick Enberg's book will no doubt become the book of choice. Laced with humorous personal anecdotes about Enberg's own public speaking experiences throughout the years, the book is both an entertaining read and a resource of humorous material for specific occasions. It also includes technical tips on how to quickly and efficiently put together a successful humorous talk. Dick Enberg's Humorous Quotes for All Occasions will pave the way toward making the speaker and his or her audience perfectly at ease and ready for a good time.

Over 500 of the best quotes in this collection of quotes Ideal for every occasion. Are you looking for the Best Funny Quotes Collection that will make you laugh out Loud? Then this is the book for you. A beautifully made compilation great book of quotes; some funny and hilarious, some wise and clever, but for sure Unforgettable Quotes to keep, treasure and share for years to come It is the perfect funny but wise book to keep next to you on your desk for moments of boredom, depression or sadness plus it also makes for the ideal funny gift for a coworker, boss, friend or family. This book is for you if you are looking for a twinge of humor in: Motivational Life Quotes Inspiring Quotes Success Quotes Love and Relationship Quotes Political Quotes Quotes on Religion, Money And more... Enjoy a wonderful collection of funny favorite quotes from ancient philosophers to modern day thinkers. Read one quote a day as a daily vitamin of inspiration, or read them in one sitting to break through negative thinking. The funny Quote book is carefully created to inspire and make you laugh on a daily basis. Find fun, laughter, guidance, wisdom, inspiration and motivation in this beautiful book containing over 500 funny quotes that you will cherish for many years to come. This handy book in a portable 6" by 9" size will be the perfect office gift that will give everyone a big laugh. The perfect Secret Santa, gag gift, Christmas, Holiday, or project employee appreciation gift for any office environment. THIS BOOK FEATURES Over 500 Different Funny quotes Stress Relieving quotes that are Great for Relaxation. 6 x 9 sized A Great Gift. Makes a wonderful gift idea for friends and family during holidays or any occasion