The Worst Case Scenario Pocket Guide Retirement

Drive a golf cart in a hurricane; dock your yacht in a typhoon; treat a knitting needle injury; and get your grown kids to move out.

Drive a golf cart in a hurricane; dock your yacht in a typhoon; treat a knitting needle injury; and get your grown kids to move out.

"A ... new philosophy and ... guide to getting the most out of your money--and out of life--for those who value memorable experiences as much as their earnings"--

Filled with action movie-inspired advice, this hilarious guide is the ultimate gag gift or stocking stuffer for anyone who wants to ‘keep up with the Indiana Joneses’ For everyone who’s ever wanted to be as smooth as James Bond, as clever as Captain Kirk, or as tough as Charlie’s Angels, The Action Hero’s Handbook is the ultimate guide to the essential skills every action hero needs to survive and thrive in this dangerous but exciting world. This book features dozens of real-life action hero techniques, directly from experts in the subjects at hand: FBI agents, sexologists, stuntmen, hypnotists, karate masters, criminologists, detectives, and many others. Learn how to: • Catch a great white shark • Deliver the Vulcan Nerve Pinch • Spyproof your hotel room • Win a fight when outnumbered • Climb down Mount Rushmore National Monument And dozens of other Good Guy Skills, Paranormal Skills, Fighting Skills, and Escape Skills. With meticulously researched step-by-step instructions and easy-to-follow illustrations, The Action Hero’s Handbook will get you ready for anything. Good luck—we’re all counting on you.

New York Times bestselling author of Vince Flynn's Mitch Rapp novels Kyle Mills rewrites the rules for thrillers with Fade -- a novel ripped from today's headlines Welcome to the new war on terror. A secret wing of Homeland Security is recruiting agents to work undercover in the Middle East, and the director wants his second-in-command, Matt Egan, to bring aboard an old friend, Salam Al Fayed—better known as Fade. He's perfect: An ex-Navy Seal and the son of immigrants, he speaks flawless Arabic. Trouble is, he's "retired"; he was wounded in the line of duty, and the government refused to pay for the risky surgery that could have helped him. Now he's walking around with a bullet lodged near his spine, and he's not too fond of anyone in the government -- least of all, his ex-best friend Matt Egan, whom he blames for his present condition. Against Egan's wishes, the director tries to "persuade" Fade to join the team. But Fade is prepared to fight back at any cost. The chase is on -- will Matt be able to find his friend-turned-fugitive before Fade can take the ultimate revenge? Fade is a remarkable, take-no-prisoners program from an unparalleled writer at the height of his talents.

A deliciously dark, unapologetically funny, and nail-bitingly tense psychological thriller by the international bestselling author of The Cry NUMBER ONE BESTSELLER *** Guardian, Telegraph, Herald Scotland AND The Week BOOK OF THE YEAR*** *** Sunday Times TOP 40 Crime Novels in the Last 5 Years*** ***Longlisted for Theakston's Old Peculier Crime Novel of the Year Award 2020*** 'Shocking, gripping and laugh-out-loud hilarious from the first line to the last. Brilliant' Erin Kelly 'This frenetic novel's strongest assets are its sheer verbal energy and the acerbic views of its heroine, who resembles a female Frankie Boyle' Sunday Times 'The main character is one of the most extraordinary you'll meet between the pages of a book' Ian Rankin 'A scandalously rude comic masterpiece' Daily Telegraph 'Sublime' Guardian _________________ Mary Shields is a moody, acerbic probation offer, dealing with some of Glasgow's worst cases, and her job is on the line. Liam Macdowall was imprisoned for murdering his wife, and he's published a series of letters to the dead woman, in a book that makes him an unlikely hero – and a poster boy for Men's Rights activists. Liam is released on licence into Mary's care, but things are far from simple. Mary develops a poisonous obsession with Liam and his world, and when her son and Liam's daughter form a relationship, Mary will stop at nothing to impose her own brand of justice ... with devastating consequences. A heart-pounding, relentless and chilling psychological thriller, rich with deliciously dark and unapologetic humour, Worst Case Scenario is also a perceptive, tragic and hugely relevant book by one of the most exciting names in crime fiction. _________________ 'Laced with pitch-dark acerbic humour, the classic thriller gets a hell of a twist' Heat 'This darkly, funny, shocking and surprisingly emotional thriller is unlike anything you've ever read before' Fabulous Magazine 'This novel is a funny, agonising account of one good woman's battle with rage, guilt, fear, duty and disaster' Literary Review 'Absolutely compelling company from start to finish in this wonderful, energetic, hard-hitting and deeply funny novel' Big Issue 'Simply stunning. Dark, uncompromising, funny, and almost impossible to put down' Luca Veste 'Outrageous, extremely funny and ultimately devastating' Ambrose Parry 'Dark humour and darker truths permeate a thrilling crime novel that is fabulously transgressive and completely unique ... nobody writes like Helen Fitzgerald' Mark Billingham 'Helen Fitzgerald is one of a kind, and a welcome breath of fresh air in the world of off-beat but achingly relatable crime fiction' SJI Holliday 'A dark, comic masterpiece which manages to be both excruciatingly tense and laugh-out-loud funny at the same time. Great stuff!' Mark Edwards

The authors of the Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook series are back with all-new, expert advice designed to help readers fend off hordes of vampires, zombies, werewolves, ghosts, wizards, and other paranormal creatures.