The Worst Case Scenario Survival Handbook Middle School

Reading, writing, and—wardrobe disasters? Stop tween troubles in their tracks with help from the series that has sold more than ten million copies worldwide. Homework, hormones, heartache . . . middle school has no shortage of perils. Never fear, the authors of the bestselling Worst-Case Scenario series return with a survival guide for those who are facing—or just about to face—this big transitional time in school and life. The handbook is packed with funny-but-useful tips for the trickiest situations that crop up in middle school, like taking charge of a too-busy homework schedule, dealing with a cold shoulder from a friend who has suddenly become just too cool, avoiding common e-mail and cell phone disasters, and more. Praise for the Worst-Case Scenario Survival series “What this book lacks in spiritual enlightenment, it more than makes up for with the practical advice you thought you’d never need.” —The Irish Times “Though neither written nor read in a humorous manner, the book nevertheless amuses in a strange way . . . affords some camp appeal in the tradition of outdated high school safety films.” —Publishers Weekly “There is something for everyone. It has a wide range of scenarios from dangerous to just downright irritating . . . It is fun, witty, entertaining and you learn something along the way too.” —Quill Quotes

The newest title in the phenomenally successful Worst-Case Scenario series provides kid-friendly, hands-on, step-by-step instructions for outwitting a nosy sibling, surviving a school dance, and more. Illustrations.

The only survival guide a middle school kid will ever need. It can be the best of times. It can be the worst of times, too. Middle school happens at that tumultuous time in life when one's not a teenager and not a little kid. Middle school means being a middle-aged kid. Expectations-from teachers, parents, friends, siblings-can all change dramatically, causing worry and concern even for the most laid-back student. The Middle School Survival Guide covers every issue, inside school and out, from the most trivial concerns to the most serious issues that middle school students face today. Arlene Erlbach has assembled a teen advisory board of 200 kids between fifth and tenth grade who give advice about topics from cracking a locker combination, to dealing with multiple teachers, to sex and dating.

Braces. Bullies. Chores. Childhood is chock-full of perilsbut finally here's something to come to the rescue. The newest title in the phenomenally successful Worst-Case Scenario series provides kid-friendly, hands-on, step-by-step instructions for outwitting a nosy sibling, surviving a school dance, cleaning your room in a snap, dealing with an irritated parent (recognizing the tell-tale signs!), and more.

A useful and entertaining guide to practical skills for homesteaders—or anyone who likes to do things with their own two hands. For anyone who wants to learn how to make cheese, catch a runaway pig, mend a fence post, milk a cow, or throw an unforgettable barn party, this engaging volume delivers timeless advice on accomplishing tasks big and small around the house, garden, and farm. Featuring original text and illustrations from the 1919 first edition, this volume presents a new generation of readers with expert guidance on every facet of homesteading. With projects that range from practical (ridding a yard of poison ivy) to downright bemusing (organizing a potato peeling contest), this delightful book is equal parts useful and entertaining. An ode to self-reliance brimming with wit, wisdom, and nostalgia, this is a must-have for anyone who enjoys doing things with their own two hands, on the farm or in the backyard, the kitchen, or the workshop.

New York Times bestseller An uproarious tale of romance, heartbreak, and tentacled mayhem inspired by the classic Jane Austen novel—from the publisher of Pride and Prejudice and Zombies Sense and Sensibility and Sea Monsters expands the original text of the beloved Jane Austen novel with all-new scenes of giant lobsters, rampaging octopi, two-headed sea serpents, and other biological monstrosities. As our story opens, the Dashwood sisters are evicted from their childhood home and sent to live on a mysterious island full of savage creatures and dark secrets. While sensible Elinor falls in love with Edward Ferrars, her romantic sister Marianne is courted by both the handsome Willoughby and the hideous man-monster Colonel Brandon. Can the Dashwood sisters triumph over meddlesome matriarchs and unscrupulous rogues to find true love? Or will they fall prey to the tentacles that are forever snapping at their heels? This masterful portrait of Regency England blends Jane Austen’s biting social commentary with ultraviolent depictions of sea monsters biting. It’s survival of the fittest—and only the swiftest swimmers will find true love!

The authors of the phenomenally best-selling Worst-Case Scenario Survival series have taught millions to prepare for the worst—but how can readers be sure they're really ready? The Worst-Case Scenario Book of Survival Questions collects hundreds of survival dilemmas and questions designed to test true survival skill and daring. Fifty percent longer than the handbooks, this challenging, interactive, and informative book is packed with survival trivia, expert tips, adventurous situations, and illustrations. Your car is careening toward a 20-foot drop into a river: do you leap from the car immediately, or wait to swim free once it begins to sink? Is it worse to be lost in the jungle during the day or in the desert at night? If you had to perform an emergency tracheotomy, where would you make the incision? In hundreds of multiple-choice quizzes, story problems, and questions, The Worst-Case Scenario Book of Survival Questions provides need-to-know answers to life's unexpected turns for the worst. Also included is a Worst-Case Scenario Aptitude Test (WCSAT), which can be scored at home to ensure optimum readiness. Don't wait until it's too late!

Filled with action movie-inspired advice, this hilarious guide is the ultimate gag gift or stocking stuffer for anyone who wants to ‘keep up with the Indiana Joneses’ For everyone who’s ever wanted to be as smooth as James Bond, as clever as Captain Kirk, or as tough as Charlie’s Angels, The Action Hero’s Handbook is the ultimate guide to the essential skills every action hero needs to survive and thrive in this dangerous but exciting world. This book features dozens of real-life action hero techniques, directly from experts in the subjects at hand: FBI agents, sexologists, stuntmen, hypnotists, karate masters, criminologists, detectives, and many others. Learn how to: • Catch a great white shark • Deliver the Vulcan Nerve Pinch • Spyproof your hotel room • Win a fight when outnumbered • Climb down Mount Rushmore National Monument And dozens of other Good Guy Skills, Paranormal Skills, Fighting Skills, and Escape Skills. With meticulously researched step-by-step instructions and easy-to-follow illustrations, The Action Hero’s Handbook will get you ready for anything. Good luck—we’re all counting on you.