Why Do We Hurt Ourselves

A sociological analysis of self-injury, the causes of it, and the conditions surrounding those who commit it. Why does an estimated 5% of the general population intentionally and repeatedly hurt themselves? What are the reasons certain people resort to self-injury as a way to manage their daily lives? In Why Do We Hurt Ourselves, sociologist Baptiste Brossard draws on a five-year survey of self-injurers and suggests that the answers can be traced to social, more than personal, causes. Self-injury is not a matter of disturbed individuals resorting to hurting themselves in the face of individual weaknesses and difficulties. Rather, self-injury is the reaction of individuals to the tensions that compose, day after day, the tumultuousness of their social life and position. Self-harm is a practice that people use to self-control and maintain order—to calm down, or to avoid “going haywire” or “breaking everything.” More broadly, through this research Brossard works to develop a perspective on the contemporary social world at large, exploring quests for self-control in modern Western societies.

1. This book offers an unprecedented perspective on a crucial social and psychological issue in Western countries, where, on average 18% of adolescents and young people say they have self-harmed at least once in their life. 2. While this work is a rigorous academic study, it is written in language comprehensible for any reader. It takes the unique perspective that the issues behind self-harm are more socially driven, aimed at maintaining order within social settings and place. 3. The book keeps readers engaged by making good use of strong personal stories. The text alternates between short and effective analytical sections and long presentation of individual stories and cases, relating excerpts from interviews and observations.

Nonsuicidal self-injury (NSSI) is a baffling, troubling, and hard to treat phenomenon that has increased markedly in recent years. Key issues in diagnosing and treating NSSI adequately include differentiating it from attempted suicide and other mental disorders, as well as understanding the motivations for self-injury and the context in which it occurs. This accessible and practical book provides therapists and students with a clear understanding of these key issues, as well as of suitable assessment techniques. It then goes on to delineate research-informed treatment approaches for NSSI, with an emphasis on functional assessment, emotion regulation, and problem solving, including motivational interviewing, interpersonal skills, CBT, DBT, behavioral management strategies, delay behaviors, exercise, family therapy, risk management, and medication, as well as how to successfully combine methods.

“Self-loathing is a dark land studded with booby traps. Fumbling through its dark underbrush, we cannot see what our trouble actually is: that we are mistaken about ourselves. That we were told lies long ago that we, in love and loyalty and fear, believed. Will we believe ourselves to death?” —from Unworthy As someone who has struggled with low self-esteem her entire life, Anneli Rufus knows only too well how the world looks through the eyes of those who are not comfortable in their own skin. In Unworthy, Rufus boldly explores how a lack of faith in ourselves can turn us into our own worst enemies. Drawing on extensive research, enlightening interviews, and her own poignant experiences, Rufus considers the question: What personal, societal, biological, and historical factors coalesced to spark this secret epidemic, and what can be done to put a stop to it? She reveals the underlying sources of low self-esteem and leads us through strategies for positive change.

Discover a Life Filled with Passion, Meaning, and Purpose New York Times bestselling author Debbie Ford leads us into the heart of the duality that unknowingly operates within each one of us. Providing the tools to end self-sabotage, Ford ultimately knocks down the façade of the false self and shows us how to heal the split between light and dark and live the authentic life within our reach.

Fascinating patient stories and dynamic exercises help you connect to healing emotions, ease anxiety and depression, and discover your authentic self. Sara suffered a debilitating fear of asserting herself. Spencer experienced crippling social anxiety. Bonnie was shut down, disconnected from her feelings. These patients all came to psychotherapist Hilary Jacobs Hendel seeking treatment for depression, but in fact none of them were chemically depressed. Rather, Jacobs Hendel found that they’d all experienced traumas in their youth that caused them to put up emotional defenses that masqueraded as symptoms of depression. Jacobs Hendel led these patients and others toward lives newly capable of joy and fulfillment through an empathic and effective therapeutic approach that draws on the latest science about the healing power of our emotions. Whereas conventional therapy encourages patients to talk through past events that may trigger anxiety and depression, accelerated experiential dynamic psychotherapy (AEDP), the method practiced by Jacobs Hendel and pioneered by Diana Fosha, PhD, teaches us to identify the defenses and inhibitory emotions (shame, guilt, and anxiety) that block core emotions (anger, sadness, fear, disgust, joy, excitement, and sexual excitement). Fully experiencing core emotions allows us to enter an openhearted state where we are calm, curious, connected, compassionate, confident, courageous, and clear. In It’s Not Always Depression, Jacobs Hendel shares a unique and pragmatic tool called the Change Triangle—a guide to carry you from a place of disconnection back to your true self. In these pages, she teaches lay readers and helping professionals alike • why all emotions—even the most painful—have value. • how to identify emotions and the defenses we put up against them. • how to get to the root of anxiety—the most common mental illness of our time. • how to have compassion for the child you were and the adult you are. Jacobs Hendel provides navigational tools, body and thought exercises, candid personal anecdotes, and profound insights gleaned from her patients’ remarkable breakthroughs. She shows us how to work the Change Triangle in our everyday lives and chart a deeply personal, powerful, and hopeful course to psychological well-being and emotional engagement.

Why do men and women lock themselves in painful intimacies, continue to work for tyrannical bosses, and put up with people who humiliate them? Exploring the self-inflicted suffering of everyday life, this book sheds light on a widespread psychological phenomenon of our time--and points the way to breaking that pattern of unhappiness.