41 Love

A darkly funny sports memoir about a mid-life crisis, exercise addiction, tennis, and how to grow up when you really, really don't want to At forty-one, Scarlett Thomas was a successful novelist and a senior academic. She’d quit smoking, gotten healthier, settled down in a lovely house with a wonderful partner. She’d had all the therapy. Then her beloved dog died. Her parents started to get sick right around the time she realized she was never going to be a mother herself. For the first time in her life, maintaining her ideal weight had become nearly impossible. She was supposed to grow up, but she didn’t know how. So instead she decided to regress, to go back to the thing she’d loved best as a child but had inexplicably abandoned: tennis. Thomas knows she’s not the only person to have wondered whether throwing enough money and time and passion at something can make your dream come true. 41–Love is heartbreaking but frequently funny as Thomas finds she’ll do anything to win—almost anything.

A darkly funny sports memoir about a mid-life crisis, exercise addiction, tennis, and how to grow up when you really, really don't want to At forty-one, Scarlett Thomas was a successful novelist and a senior academic. She’d quit smoking, gotten healthier, settled down in a lovely house with a wonderful partner. She’d had all the therapy. Then her beloved dog died. Her parents started to get sick right around the time she realized she was never going to be a mother herself. For the first time in her life, maintaining her ideal weight had become nearly impossible. She was supposed to grow up, but she didn’t know how. So instead she decided to regress, to go back to the thing she’d loved best as a child but had inexplicably abandoned: tennis. Thomas knows she’s not the only person to have wondered whether throwing enough money and time and passion at something can make your dream come true. 41–Love is heartbreaking but frequently funny as Thomas finds she’ll do anything to win—almost anything.

Until something goes wrong, we take our hearts for granted. Heart-Smart-Gurus, inspired by long research, point to that bright red Valentine in our chests, pumping tirelessly and endlessly on our behalf. But one day textbook cardiagram wiggles, veer off the chart and we are pronounced, however gently, cardiologically in-correct. We feel betrayed. We more or less, thought we were doing everything right so, whats gotten into our ticker, that loyal, lifeline friend? Time for one thing, heart sore for another, Hearts are only human after all. Whats a longevity-seeker to do, especially if blessed with enough heart-health insurance to make high-tech opportunities, breakdownaffordable? The concept of preventing heart ache, arresting it, or reversing it, is Valentines number one topic. For me its a question of flat out prevention, to heal the heart emotionally, via a softening process designed to protect the precious pump. Accumulation of blockage is what causes arterial malfunction. Deprived of emotional oxygen, our own hearts cannot dilate freely. Regular exercise may prevent an attack, and insure loves longevity. Superman has nobody, doesnt need a seat belt, nor even a plane. Are you flying solo? Be a friend. Find a lover. No man is an island. A centuries-old someone pointed out: Friendship doubles our joy and divides our grief. When needed, good friends give major doses of encouragement on short notice, as do family supporters when trouble finds us. A circle of wagons is a supreme conductor for immediate shelter against stray enemy arrows. The John Wayne, strong, silent type, I dont need anybody and men dont show love mentality, isnt macho, man, but flat out stupid! In this writers paraphrase, Samuel Johnson admonished, If a man does not renew his friendships, and make new acquaintances, he finds himself playing alone as he grows, too-soon old and too-late smart. One must keep friendships in constant repair. Has your friendship grown distant, worn thin, been allowed to slip away? Do a bit of friendship repair with a welcome oil-change, and a few new points and plugs. Invite a friend or lover to do lunch: Whatever it takes, fix it: Whatever it needs, mend it: Whenever it bleeds, move on to a more worthy and willing recipient of your hearts affections. An old Scottish proverb states, He who ceases to be your friend never was a good one. In other words, with friends like you, who needs enemies? While youre at it, start at home with your significant other. Maintain this key friendship when it warrants home-improvement. Remember, your mate reads you like a book, which ought not be a mystery novel. Perhaps you need to uncover the tinfoil to let her read the introduction and to truly reveal your heart, by allowing her not just to scan but to study all its pages. A woman, who is allowed this look-see inside her mates heart, is the one who becomes and remains your life-long best friend, partner and home companion. A Promise Keeper, fueled by faith, fired with compassion and true to God, achieves unconditional passions for love of life, love of wife, of relatives and friends, co-workers, and parishioners, and has love to spare even for enemies. So turn the other cheek. The other kiss may be love-saving. To have a friend is to be one; its the beginning of relationships that lead to loves: paternal, filial, (described as fraternal), as in Philadelphia, (city of brotherly love), and Eros, even if the arrows point in alternate-lifestyle directions, and sex without love or marriage. Agape love, of course, is the ultimate love of our Creator for his Creation, leading to Eternal Love, if you will, that Father-God promises His children. To love one another as He loves us, is not a request, but a command, from the Nurturer who furnishes the glue to make it stick. Can you buy love? Sure, if youre shopping for a convenient kind, tried and untrue. You can only earn respect by modeling love. It is o

This volume is in a series which explores the most current research in the Area Of Environmental Stressors And The Emotional Reaction They Envoke. Divided into four parts it considers stress in the workplace, in daily life, in schools as well as stress and disease.