9 Lies That Will Destroy Your Marriage

A vital resource for a thriving marriage from Focus on the Family.

Expose the Lies. Understand the Truths. And Make Your Marriage Better than Ever! Lies about marriage are rampant in our culture—and in our churches. But the corresponding truths can strengthen your marriage and even save it from collapse. 9 Lies That Will Destroy Your Marriage identifies the lies, explains how they can disintegrate your marriage, and reveals truths that can rescue it and help it to become the marriage of your dreams. Greg Smalley, a general marriage expert, and Robert Paul, the therapeutic director of Hope Restored, a renowned crisis marriage program created for Focus on the Family, combine to offer an unusual and powerful combination of perspectives that can restore hope and healing in any marriage, including yours. What Are the 9 Lies about Marriage? Love Lie #1: And They Lived Happily Ever After Love Lie #2: 1 + 1 = 1 Love Lie #3: All You Need Is Love Love Lie #4: I Must Sacrifice Who I Am for the Sake of My Marriage Love Lie #5: You Must Meet Each Other’s Needs Love Lie #6: Our Differences Are Irreconcilable Love Lie #7: I’m Gonna Make You Love Me Love Lie #8: “Your Love Is Driving Me Crazy!” Love Lie #9: You Win Some, You Lose Some Do any of these lies resonate with you? Read 9 Lies That Will Destroy Your Marriage and start exposing the lies and living the truth. Includes several self-tests to help you and your spouse assess the extent to which your marriage has been affected by each of the nine lies.

In this counter intuitive book, author Dr. Greg Smalley maintains that fighting is actually good for a marriage. Couples will learn how to fight their way to a better marriage, using the skills, concepts, and exercises shared in this remarkable book.

Are You Married to Your Roommate . . . or Your Lover? Whether you’ve been married for six years or six decades, you may wake up one day to discover that the person sleeping next to you has become a stranger. Between work, kids, financial woes, and the busyness of everyday living, your marriage may feel like it’s on life support. You and your spouse love each other, but you’re both barely hanging on. How do you find your way back? How do you reconnect with your spouse and capture all that marriage is intended to be? Dr. Greg and Erin Smalley understand. Despite being hailed as marriage experts, they found themselves living more like roommates than lovers. Through intentional work, they fought their way back, and you can too. In Reconnected, they’ll walk alongside you and your spouse as you learn to reconnect by: Sharing life-giving communication Dreaming together about your future Rekindling romance and passion Embracing your individuality while coming together as a couple Transforming your life from one of busyness to one of connection Take your marriage from surviving to thriving. Reconnect with your first love.

What if God has purposed your marriage for something so much more than "happily ever after?" Since the very beginning, God's design for marriage has been for husbands and wives to be ambassadors of holy love to a hurting world. Still, too many couples stop short at happy and wonder why they feel unsatisfied. Rather than "you and me against the world," God calls each couple to the rich and meaningful mission of "you and me for the world." In Marriage After God, Aaron and Jennifer Smith, popular marriage bloggers at HusbandRevolution.com and UnveiledWife.com, transparently share their own journey of turning a marriage in crisis into a marriage built on Christ's redemptive love. With fresh biblical insight and intimate stories of their own struggles and victories, this book will guide you toward a God-centered, ministry-minded, and thriving marriage. Throughout Marriage After God, you'll learn to: Discover the signature marks of a marriage after God Find principles for building an unshakable marriage foundation Let God's story take the lead in your love story Recognize the tools God has already equipped you with for a missional life together Filled with timeless wisdom, this thorough and practical book will empower you and your spouse to dream, decide, and do as you step hand in hand into God's ultimate purpose for your marriage. God has created your remarkable, romantic, and redemptive relationship to be a powerful light to a dark and hurting world. Let Marriage After God be your invitation to marriage as God intended--a life-saving, hope-inspiring, and transforming force of God's love. Praise for Marriage After God: "This book is an incredible resource for anyone trying to grow or step into a healthier and more life-giving marriage. Aaron and Jen pull no punches; are honest, raw, and authentic; and show that a marriage in pursuit of Jesus can change the world." --Jefferson Bethke, New York Times bestselling author of Jesus > Religion "There is a short list of books I'm stashing away for my three small kiddos to read when they are older--Marriage After God is one of them. Dear couples of the world, you have picked up a treasure! This book will give you clear direction to live out God's will for your marriage. There is no greater gift you can give yourselves than to run after Him together. Marriage After God will show you how!" --Lara Casey, author of Cultivate and Make It Happen

Something Has to Change… You can’t put it into words, but something is happening to you. Your stomach churns, your heart aches, and the tension in your marriage is making you feel weary and a little crazy. The constant criticism, disrespect, cruelty, deceit, and gross indifference are eroding your confidence and breaking your spirit. For any woman caught in an emotionally destructive marriage, Leslie Vernick offers a personalized path forward. Based on decades of counseling experience, her intensely practical, biblical advice will show you how to establish boundaries and break free from emotional abuse. Learn to: · identify damaging behaviors · gain the skills to respond wisely · promote healthy change · stay safe · understand when, why, and even how to leave · recognize that God sees and hates what is happening to you Trying harder to be a perfect fantasy wife won’t help fix what’s wrong your marriage. Discover instead how you can initiate effective changes to stop the cycle of destruction and restore hope for the future. “Women in an emotionally abusive marriage do not need another book on how to have a good marriage; those books rub salt in raw wounds. No, they desperately need this book so that they can diagnose just how bad their marriage is and then, with Leslie’s clear expertise, develop a plan that will either begin to turn their marriage around...or give them a wise route of escape.” —Dee Brestin, author of Idol Lies and The Friendships of Women

Resurrect beauty from the ashes of betrayal Wife and mother Cindy Beall’s world was shattered when her beloved husband of nine years confessed his pornography addiction, numerous affairs, and the stunning news that another woman was pregnant with his child. What could have been the end of a marriage instead became a testament to God’s miraculous ability to restore broken hearts and damaged bonds. With the wisdom and healing she’s gained in the twenty years that have passed since her husband’s devastating revelation, Cindy shares her own experience as well as those of couples she’s counselled. Drawing from her intimate knowledge of human pain and God’s power, Cindy shows how you can… seek support, counseling, and prayer after deception has surfaced rebuild trust that’s been eroded by infidelity, addiction, or other transgressions help your family heal from grief and reconcile with any long-term consequences rely on God to pursue forgiveness and move forward in new promises Cindy’s remarkable story, compassion, and grasp of God’s Word will help you trust God with your heartache as you seek His hope and redemption.

NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • Over a million copies sold! “An eminently practical guide to an emotionally intelligent—and long-lasting—marriage.”—Daniel Goleman, author of Emotional Intelligence The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work has revolutionized the way we understand, repair, and strengthen marriages. John Gottman’s unprecedented study of couples over a period of years has allowed him to observe the habits that can make—and break—a marriage. Here is the culmination of that work: the seven principles that guide couples on a path toward a harmonious and long-lasting relationship. Straightforward yet profound, these principles teach partners new approaches for resolving conflicts, creating new common ground, and achieving greater levels of intimacy. Gottman offers strategies and resources to help couples collaborate more effectively to resolve any problem, whether dealing with issues related to sex, money, religion, work, family, or anything else. Packed with new exercises and the latest research out of the esteemed Gottman Institute, this revised edition of The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work is the definitive guide for anyone who wants their relationship to attain its highest potential.