Bi Men

A moving and pioneering celebration of the male bisexual self that addresses biphobia in our society In today’s sexual world, both straight and gay and lesbian communities still often refuse to accept the reality of bisexuality. Bi Men: Coming Out Every Which Way confronts head-on the limiting views that bisexuality is a transitional phase of sexual evolution or a simple refusal to accept being either homosexual or straight. This pioneering collection of moving personal essays by bisexual men and those who love them explores what it means to be bisexual in today’s monosexually oriented society. The millennial shift in sexual perspectives draws more and more men to come out as being attracted to both women and men. Bisexual and bi-curious men will find comfort and camaraderie in these stories about coming out, its impact on family and marriage, evolving perspectives on bisexuals within the LGBT community, and the building of acceptance and affirmation for bisexuality and polyamory. The nearly three dozen essays in Bi Men: Coming Out Every Which Way are told in the honest words of bisexuals, confirming the validity of their place in the world while illustrating that there are more bi men than anyone ever realized. These diverse and pioneering men’s stories reveal a long-disguised and unconventional truth—that bisexuality is a valid lifestyle that does not threaten either sexual camp. Each contributor to this collection affirms the innate fluidity of self, sexuality, family, and community, and proclaims that sexuality is truly diverse in its predispositions and creativity. Bi Men: Coming Out Every Which Way separates its essays into four parts: coming out and personal realization of bisexual nature bisexuality’s effects on family and marriage an examination of the shifting viewpoints of bisexuality within gay communities ways in which bisexuals can affirm and respect their own desires and celebrate their sexual selves These intimate stories address: biphobia monosexual prejudice the impact on marriage family issues coming out to self, spouse, and family political and community issues religious and spiritual concerns Bi Men: Coming Out Every Which Way is a vibrant, reassuring call to bisexuals, the bi-curious, or anybody who knows and loves a bisexual/bi-curious man, to read and more completely understand the unique issues of being bisexual while providing the ultimate affirmation of bisexuality’s existence.

A moving and pioneering celebration of the male bisexual self that addresses biphobia in our society In today’s sexual world, both straight and gay and lesbian communities still often refuse to accept the reality of bisexuality. Bi Men: Coming Out Every Which Way confronts head-on the limiting views that bisexuality is a transitional phase of sexual evolution or a simple refusal to accept being either homosexual or straight. This pioneering collection of moving personal essays by bisexual men and those who love them explores what it means to be bisexual in today’s monosexually oriented society. The millennial shift in sexual perspectives draws more and more men to come out as being attracted to both women and men. Bisexual and bi-curious men will find comfort and camaraderie in these stories about coming out, its impact on family and marriage, evolving perspectives on bisexuals within the LGBT community, and the building of acceptance and affirmation for bisexuality and polyamory. The nearly three dozen essays in Bi Men: Coming Out Every Which Way are told in the honest words of bisexuals, confirming the validity of their place in the world while illustrating that there are more bi men than anyone ever realized. These diverse and pioneering men’s stories reveal a long-disguised and unconventional truth—that bisexuality is a valid lifestyle that does not threaten either sexual camp. Each contributor to this collection affirms the innate fluidity of self, sexuality, family, and community, and proclaims that sexuality is truly diverse in its predispositions and creativity. Bi Men: Coming Out Every Which Way separates its essays into four parts: coming out and personal realization of bisexual nature bisexuality’s effects on family and marriage an examination of the shifting viewpoints of bisexuality within gay communities ways in which bisexuals can affirm and respect their own desires and celebrate their sexual selves These intimate stories address: biphobia monosexual prejudice the impact on marriage family issues coming out to self, spouse, and family political and community issues religious and spiritual concerns Bi Men: Coming Out Every Which Way is a vibrant, reassuring call to bisexuals, the bi-curious, or anybody who knows and loves a bisexual/bi-curious man, to read and more completely understand the unique issues of being bisexual while providing the ultimate affirmation of bisexuality’s existence.

An unapologetic guide for readers who are Black, masc, and bi—unlearning biphobia, coming out, combatting erasure, and embodying your whole self Through cutting social analysis, personal stories, and need-to-know advice, Dear Bi Men reclaims bi+ visibility in a culture of erasure—and unapologetically centers Blackness in a practical and deeply researched guide to navigating life, work, and relationships as a Black bi+ man. Popular representation of bi and pansexual men is growing, but we’re not there yet: It’s mostly white. It collapses bisexual identity into tired, hypersexualized tropes. And it fails to interrogate the deeply entrenched stereotypes that insist: You’re confused. You just don’t know you’re gay. You’re greedy. You must be great in bed. Author, peer counselor, and creator of #bisexualmenspeak J.R. Yussuf pushes back against these stigmas and misconceptions, exploring how white supremacy reinforces biphobia and dictates what society thinks it means to “be a man.” He contextualizes discourse around queerness and bisexuality within a larger framework that honors readers’ intersecting identities. And he offers deeply practical advice, sharing how to: Unlearn internalized biphobia and homophobia Navigate an increasingly hostile digital landscape Think about coming out: who to tell, why to tell them, and how to do it Fight back against erasure and stigma Navigate sex, dating, partnerships, marriage, friendship, and work Understand your bi+ sexuality through a political lens Process Black bi+ representation Rich with personal narratives, insightful analysis, and practical advice, this book is a powerful resource for Black bi+ men to reclaim their identity, counter biphobia, and get empowered—and an offering to all readers looking to fight back against the erasure and dehumanization wrought by patriarchy.

Framed by a comprehensive review of international research, literature, and film, this book is an intimate journey into the experiences and insights of 79 Australian women in relationships with bisexual men. It takes us into the daily lives, sexual intimacies, and families of MOREs (mixed-orientation relationships) that span the gamut from extremely oppressive experiences with bi-misogynist men to extremely liberating with bi-profeminist men. Aged 19 to 65, the women are in monogamous, open, and polyamorous relationships with bisexual-identifying and/or bisexual-behaving men. The women themselves are bisexual, lesbian, heterosexual, while others refuse to categorize their own sexualities. The book addresses the discovery or disclosure of the man's bisexuality, how the relationships work and where they flounder, how the partners negotiate and establish 'new rules' and boundaries to maintain their relationship, and the impact of class, rural/urban setting, ethnicity, indigeneity, race, religion, and education on these relationships. But this book isn’t only about MOREs. The research, revelations and reflections in this book tell us much about current and shifting global constructions and understandings of intimate relationships, sexual desires and love, and the socio-cultural representations and labeling of genders and sexualities.

Depicted as duplicitous, traitorous, and promiscuous, bisexuality has long been suspected, marginalized, and rejected by both straight and gay communities alike. Bi takes a long overdue, comprehensive look at bisexual politics—from the issues surrounding biphobia/monosexism, feminism, and transgenderism to the practice of labeling those who identify as bi as either “too bisexual” (promiscuous and incapable of fidelity) or “not bisexual enough” (not actively engaging romantically or sexually with people of at least two different genders). In this forward-thinking and eye-opening book, feminist bisexual and genderqueer activist Shiri Eisner takes readers on a journey through the many aspects of the meanings and politics of bisexuality, specifically highlighting how bisexuality can open up new and exciting ways of challenging social convention. Informed by feminist, transgender, and queer theory, as well as politics and activism, Bi is a radical manifesto for a group that has been too frequently silenced, erased, and denied—and a starting point from which to launch a bisexual revolution.

Gain an in-depth understanding of the unique struggles of the bisexual community! “To me the gay and straight worlds are exactly the same; equally limited, judgmental, and bourgeois . . . just mirror images of each other. I truly like and overlap with some of the gay world, but my roots refuse to take hold there and grow. Unfortunately, my well-established roots in the straight world are simultaneously shriveling and dying too, leaving me feeling extremely unstable.” —“Cool,” a bisexual woman involved in a support group There are at least five million bisexual people in America, generally invisible to straight society, the gay community, and even to each other. While the vast majority of these five million live within the straight or gay world, there are a few who have formed a community of their own. Bi America: Myths, Truths, and Struggles of an Invisible Community offers an inside look at the American bisexual community and gives an understanding of the special circumstances unique to being bisexual. The book takes the reader to bi community events from picnics, to conferences, to support groups, to performances in order to expose the everyday trials of the bisexual community. Bi America includes very personal stories that let the voice of everyday bisexuals be heard through interviews, the “Bisexual History Project,” in which ten bisexual people tell their life stories, and the “Online Support Group,” a group of about 75 people who meet in cyberspace to talk about their lives and challenges. The book also includes the findings of a 2002 survey of about 300 bisexual people conducted via the Internet, an appendix that offers a concise list of resources for further study and personal enrichment, and an unabridged transcript of the “Bisexual History Project.” Get the answers to these questions in Bi America: What is bisexuality? Is there a bisexual community? What is the culture of the bisexual community? What are commonalities and differences between the experiences of bi men and bi women? What is the special relationship between the bisexual and the transgender community? How have bisexuals and the bi community been affected by HIV/AIDS? What is the future of bisexual activism, if any? and many more! Bi America is a fascinating resource that exposes the challenges, struggles, and triumphs of bisexuals in America. Bisexuals, especially those newly coming out, can use this book to help understand their identity, and family members and friends seeking some insight into the unique circumstances faced by their loved ones will also find it helpful. This book will interest those concerned with the sociology of deviance or with subcultures in general. It is also appropriate for undergraduate sociology and cultural anthropology, as well as feminist studies and LGBT studies classes. This book offers one of the few accessible, nonacademic looks at this unique and interesting community. Visit the book's Web site at http://www.bi101.org

Jennifer can’t believe it. Just married and pregnant, she discovers that her husband has been meeting Brad for sex. When confronted, Tom doesn’t deny it, but he insists it’s just “a thing” and he isn’t gay. Elsewhere, John’s wife, Karen, discovers that her husband likes to watch gay porn. John doesn’t understand his wife’s reaction. Why does she care what he watches if he’s not unfaithful? In couple’s therapy, Karen and Jennifer raise the same questions: Does this mean my husband is gay? Can my marriage survive? These and other stories illustrate the difficulties inherent when a wife or girlfriend finds out her man has had or wants to have sexual contact with other men. But many times, the man is not gay or even bisexual. Of course, some men with gay sexual interests are gay men in a process of self-discovery; they are “coming out.” These desires may only reflect a different side of a man’s sexuality or some response to childhood trauma or experiences they have not fully processed. Here Joe Kort and Alexander P. Morgan make the distinction between gay men and “straight men with gay interests” clearer to women who want to know how they can overcome these revelations. The authors explain the many reasons why straight men may be drawn to gay sex; how to tell whether a man is gay, straight, or bisexual; and what the various options are for these couples, who can often go on to have very fulfilling marriages. Is My Husband Gay, Straight or Bi? is intended to help couples understand how male sexuality can express itself in ways that may be difficult to understand. Many marriages have been hurriedly terminated when couples (and their therapists) have lacked the information they needed to understand their current situations. This book provides the clarity, describes the choices, and (in many cases) offers hope for relationships and marriages that have been brushed off as doomed.

Based on research, the author explores in this publication the personal stories of forty young men to help us understand the biological and psychological factors that led them to become mostly straight and the cultural forces that are loosening the sexual bind that many boys and young men experience.