Coping With Being Adopted

Discusses feelings and questions associated with being adopted, taking into account both birth parents and adoptive parents and dealing with the beginning, the end, and everything in between.

This manual presents a structured, evidence-based protocol for mental health treatment for families that adopt vulnerable children. Children who are adopted at an older age through foster care and those adopted from overseas orphanages are at high risk for behavioral and emotional distress. This important manual presents a structured, evidence-based protocol for providing mental health treatment to families adopting vulnerable children. Drawing on their extensive clinical experience as founding members of premier national organizations that serve adopted children and their families, the authors of this book describe the typical presenting behavioral problems of adopted children, as well as the underlying issues contributing to these problems that uniquely affect adoptive families. These include concerns related to parent child attachment, loss and grief, trauma, the child's understanding of his or her adoption "story," identity development, and birth family connections. Therapy sessions deliver evidence based child coping strategies and positive parenting approaches that are tailored to account for the child's past history, alongside resiliency focused, trauma competent, attachment based treatment. The book's companion website provides free in-session handouts for practitioners. Given the unique needs of this clinical population, this book is essential for therapists who treat adopted and foster youth and their families.

Originally published in 1993, this classic piece of literature on adoption has revolutionised the way people think about adopted children. Nancy Verrier examines the life-long consequences of the 'primal wound' - the wound that is caused when a child is separated from its mother - for adopted people. Her argument is supported by thorough research in pre- and perinatal psychology, attachment, bonding and the effects of loss.

"Birthdays may be difficult for me." "I want you to take the initiative in opening conversations about my birth family." "When I act out my fears in obnoxious ways, please hang in there with me." "I am afraid you will abandon me." The voices of adopted children are poignant, questioning. And they tell a familiar story of loss, fear, and hope. This extraordinary book, written by a woman who was adopted herself, gives voice to children's unspoken concerns, and shows adoptive parents how to free their kids from feelings of fear, abandonment, and shame. With warmth and candor, Sherrie Eldridge reveals the twenty complex emotional issues you must understand to nurture the child you love--that he must grieve his loss now if he is to receive love fully in the future--that she needs honest information about her birth family no matter how painful the details may be--and that although he may choose to search for his birth family, he will always rely on you to be his parents. Filled with powerful insights from children, parents, and experts in the field, plus practical strategies and case histories that will ring true for every adoptive family, Twenty Things Adopted Kids Wish Their Adoptive Parents Knew is an invaluable guide to the complex emotions that take up residence within the heart of the adopted child--and within the adoptive home.

This book explains the role of separation trauma in the life of adoptees and birth mothers and how that trauma affects the neurological system. It demonstrates how the inner, fearful child may be running the lives of adoptees. It shows how the meaning we give to events determines our beliefs and how those beliefs control our feelings, attitudes and behavior. It gives guidelines for discovering the authentic self and for becoming accountable for our impact on others.

Based on a hugely successful US model, the Seven Core Issues in Adoption is the first conceptual framework of its kind to offer a unifying lens that was inclusive of all individuals touched by the adoption experience. The Seven Core Issues are Loss, Rejection, Shame/Guilt, Grief, Identity, Intimacy, and Mastery/Control. The book expands the model to be inclusive of adoption and all forms of permanency: adoption, foster care, kinship care, donor insemination and surrogacy. Attachment and trauma are integrated with the Seven Core Issues model to address and normalize the additional tasks individuals and families will encounter. The book views the Seven Core Issues from a range of perspectives including: multi-racial, LGBTQ, Hispanic, Asian, Native American, African-American, International, openness, search and reunion, and others. This essential guide introduces each Core Issue, its impact on individuals, offering techniques for growth and healing.

A book that explores the nuances and challenges of being an adoptive parent in North America.

In these wonderfully straightforward accounts of what it means to children to be adopted, nineteen boys and girls, from eight to sixteen years old—and from every social background—confide their feelings about this crucial fact of their lives. It is deeply affecting to listen to these children as they reveal their questions, frustrations, difficulties, and joys with an honesty that is immediate, convincing, and stirring. Their generosity will provide solace and strength for thousands of other children who share with them the experience of being adopted—and who will be helped to understand that their own emotions are normal and appropriate.