Dogbert S Top Secret Management Handbook

Behind the closed doors of corporate management lurks a manifesto so devious, so insidious, and of such diabolic power, it has the ability to transform normal human beings into paradigm–spewing zombies. Its purpose: to help bosses stick it to their employees. Its author: none other than Dogbert, the canine corporate consultant out to rule the world. All too often, new managers make mistakes such as rewarding good work with good pay, communicating clearly and improving departmental efficiency. Dogbert shows that this could have devastating consequences: Employees begin to expect fair treatment and compensation, productive workers show results (making managers look bad by comparison), and the department's future budget allotment could be decreased because it spends only what it needs. Drawing from his years of experience tormenting Dilbert and advising his boss, our Machiavellian mutt uses pithy essays, illustrated by scores of comic strips, to teach neophyte managers such potent practices as: The power of verbal instructions: Sound like a boss while maintaining complete deniability! Empty promises of promotion: all the motivational benefits, none of the costs! Pretending to care: Learn how to hear without listening! Incentives: Inspire employees by giving them worthless knickknacks! Once again firmly establishing Scott Adams as the spokesman for the absurdities of the workplace (and Dogbert as the guru of sticking it to the masses), Dogbert's Top Secret Management Handbook is the perfect gift for all cubicle dwellers and their bosses.

First published in 1997, the successor to The Dilbert Principle is this time written by Dilbert's canine, Dogbert. He teaches new managers vital skills such as how to be leaders without making any decisions and how to inspire employees by giving them worthless knick-knacks. Scott Adams combines the challenges at work with the challenges of life.

Here's everything you need to know about how business really operates courtesy of Dogbert.

Dilbert and the gang are back for this 26th collection, another take-off of office life that will appeal to cubicle dwellers across the globe.

With this book, Scott Adams follows in the footsteps of other great futurists, i.e., sitting at home making stuff up that can't be proven wrong for many years. Featuring the same mix of essays and cartoons that made The Dilbert Principle so uniquely entertaining, The Dilbert Future offers predictions on business, technology, society, and government. Some predictions include: children are our future, so grab what you can while they're still too little to stop us; and humans will finally learn to use the 90 percent of the brain we don't use today, and find out that there wasn't anything in that part.

The World’s Most Influential Book on Personal Success The bestselling classic that made Systems Over Goals, Talent Stacking, and Passion Is Overrated universal success advice has been reborn. Once in a generation, a book revolutionizes its category and becomes the preeminent reference that all subsequent books on the topic must pay homage to, in name or in spirit. How to Fail at Almost Everything and Still Win Big by Scott Adams, creator of Dilbert, is such a book for the field of personal success. A contrarian pundit and persuasion expert in a class of his own, Adams has reached hundreds of millions directly and indirectly through the 2013 first edition’s straightforward yet counterintuitive advice—to invite failure in, embrace it, then pick its pocket. The second edition of How to Fail is a tighter, updated version, by popular demand. Yet new and returning readers alike will find the same candor, humor, and timeless wisdom on productivity, career growth, health and fitness, and entrepreneurial success as the original classic. How to Fail at Almost Everything and Still Win Big, Second Edition is the essential read (or re-read) for anyone who wants to find a unique path to personal victory—and make luck find you in whatever you do.

In this new mass-market format, Sunday Times best-selling author Scott Adams presents an outrageous look at work, home, and everyday life in. Building on Dilbert's theory that "All people are idiots," Adams now says, "they are also weasels." Just ask anyone who worked at Enron. In this book, Adams takes a look into the Weasel Zone, the giant grey area between good moral behaviour and outright criminality. In the Weasel Zone, where most people reside, everything is misleading but not exactly a lie. Building on his hugely popular comic strip, Adams looks into work, home, and everyday life and exposes the weasel in everyone. With appearances from all the regular comic strip characters, Adams and Dilbert are at the top of their game - master satirists who expose the truth while making us laugh our heads off. 'Funny, apt - relentless' Financial Times 'It would be unwise to bet against The Way of the Weasel' Economist

Cartoons from the comic strip "Dilbert" feature the hapless engineer and his cynical canine companion, Dogbert.