Everything Changed When I Forgave Myself

Love does the job. travelling too. writing does it. music. Also art, whisky, dark-coloured flowers and watching the landscape change in October. Driving on a small road somewhere in Italy with a beautiful boy and I don't want to be anywhere else in the whole wide world than right there, with him, that very car, smiling. But I close my eyes for one second and the moment is gone. I'm back to getting high on empty roads somewhere in Sweden and I'm the loneliest girl in the whole damn world and I just want all things beautiful. I just want the music, the literature, the art and the moments of driving in a car with a beautiful boy in Italy. but here, alone, I have no cares in the world. I have no cares in the world. I just want it all to be beautiful. ___________ The 4th book from Swedish songwriter & author Charlotte Eriksson is a narrative journey from a lost and wandering youth, trying to find a place in the world, to slowly growing into a peaceful meditation on the joys of growing up, changing and befriending yourself. We get to follow a young woman, consciously creating herself, striving towards an adult self. "Where are our heroes?" she asks. "Where are our role models? Why are we leaving youth behind and laughing at the ones who are still there? Why not help each other out instead? with a little grace. with a little compassion. Love for all and everyone around because we're all stumbling or succeeding back and forth, every day, and I want more community. I want helpers and guidance. Am I helping someone?" Charlotte helps by documenting her struggles, inner journeys and outer experiences, and she helps by sharing them with the world as boldly and bravely as she does. "We're all going through the same journey of growing from kids to teenagers to young adults to somewhat adult-to maybe a little calmer, to even more calm, and some lose their ways here but I want to speak up about it and hear that we're all on the same journey. We're all on the same road but it feels like everyone's ashamed of walking this road so everyone's looking down, trying not to be seen, pretending their feet are steady and not stumbling." ___________ "And what am I? I'm forever stuck in a nonexistent place where no time passes and I do so much and learn so much but I don't grow. I'm still teenage me wanting more. Wanting less. Wanting anything and everything and I think I should grow up now. Grow out of childish anxiety and sorrows for all things past and everyone has moved on from schools and neighbourhoods and I moved first and swore the loudest on never coming back but now I dream about all things past. Going back. How do you transition from being a lost teenager, to one of those calm and serene souls of integrity and certainty? Because that's what I must do, now, soon. Do others feel left behind too, or is it just me? Like the train left with everyone on it and I'm still standing on the platform trying to decide if I should watch the sky for another hour or go change my ticket. Maybe sometimes you need to just close your eyes and jump on the train without feeling ready, and grow your steady breath on the way. I think sometimes you don't know how much you're capable of until you're forced to grow into it."

Take a shower, wash off the day. Drink a glass of water. Make the room dark. Lie down and close your eyes. Notice the silence. Notice your heart. Still beating. Still fighting. You made it, after all. You made it, another day. And you can make it one more. You're doing just fine. Named after the poem that has been shared over 400,000 times on Tumblr, this is the third book from young author and songwriter Charlotte Eriksson. A collection of prose and poetry with the theme of hope, recovery and finding beauty in the darkness. An exploration of the life of a young artist with an aching heart, urged by a wanderlust that leads and directs, and the simple task of learning how to live with yourself. "Charlotte knows her reader so well that it feels like she's writing my very own journal."

"This was the year I learned to no longer depend on other people to get by, nor be stubbornly independent without any help from anyone or anything. This was the year I instead learned to say: you can depend on me. I will be your stability, you can always count on me.I said it to myself and to others, over and over until I believed it. I will stand like a lighthouse in the storm and repeat over and over: you can depend on me. This was the year I stopped begging for things to happen, and instead made them happen myself. This was the year I stopped living my life according to someone else's needs, and instead explored my own. This was the year I learned to stop begging people to love me. If someone wants to go, let them go. This was the year I learned that every person who shows up in your life is there to teach you a lesson, and they will stay until you have learned what you need to learn. Then they will leave, whether you want them to or not, and you must let them. This was the year I learned that you must dare to leave something or someone completely, leaving that space empty and aching, in order to open up space for something new. And you must know that there is a new lesson and a new person, in a new place with a new life waiting for you. This was the year I learned that what's coming is always better than what has been. Don't hold on to things that are over. Let them go, bravely." The 5th book from Swedish author and songwriter, Charlotte Eriksson, is a story about cold love, told from every angle. "No matter what, he loved me some days. I'm sure he did. At least now I love myself, and I don't think I would if he still loved me. I don't think I would love myself if I still loved him."

A young writer's search for a place called home, what it means to be an artist, and finding peace with a restless heart. The follow up to Charlotte Eriksson's first book "Empty Roads & Broken Bottles; in search for The Great Perhaps", is the continued self-exploring quest of a young artist. Poetry, travel stories and journals that brings you in to this young girl's journey. ---------------- The journals and poetry explore the dreamer's fate of leaving and arriving, love and loss, and learning to go on on your own. It captures the city of Berlin, where I somehow ended up. The broken concrete, conversations with strangers, small moments of ache or clarity. The stories leads to the chapter of my Album Journals "Learning What It Means To Be An Artist," which is a series of journals and letters behind what came to be my second album "I Must Be Gone and Live, or Stay and Die". The album and this book go hand in hand and the lyrics and quotes blend into one another. The reader will find the book as a world of its own, and the listener of the album will find the musical world expanded into reality.

"Like a modern day vagabonding beat poet, the possible love-child of Patti Smith and Charles Bukowski - Eriksson is a rare soul in today's society. Carefully balancing between wanting to defy the world, and wanting nothing more than to be a part of it." At 18 years old she left her home in Sweden and took off on her own to embark on the long journey of creating a life for herself. A life she could be proud of. A life that made her excited to wake up every morning. With nothing but a guitar, her stories and a dream, she spent a year wandering in England, sleeping at train stations, airports and helpful fans' couches. Singing for whoever was willing to listen and collecting stories. Her first book Empty Roads & Broken Bottles; in search for The Great Perhaps, is Charlotte's own journey of fighting for her dream, living rootless, learning solitude, the difference between having a home and feeling at home and how she finally found a home in herself, in her music, in her words.An ordinary girl created a community, now with thousands of fans following her journey. Aspiring to inspire others to follow their hearts and go against the tide, showing that you can achieve and become exactly who you want to be, if you just want it bad enough. "She seems to have such a deep love for life and experience, both the good and the bad, this book made me want to go out and live my life to the fullest. I want to feel all of this too." This book is filled with philosophical explorations, inspiring stories of facing fear and doubts, words on love and loss, hurting and healing. The second part of the book is Charlotte's own journals, written during her wandering year in England. Bold and honest, raw from stream-of-consciousness. She doesn't cover up how hard life can really be, how deep love can cut, or how mesmerising a simple conversation can be. Now, a few years later, Charlotte has become a prolific songwriter and author. She's released 3 critically acclaimed albums, published 3 books, and had excerpts from her books shared on large platforms such as Thought Catalog, Bella Grace Magazine, Berlin ArtParasites and Word Porn. She's taken on the challenge of writing comforting words on mental illness, depression, wanting more, heartbreak, chasing a dream and losing people. But this, is where it all started. "I wanted to turn my life into art, my very existence into a poem. This is my story. It might not always be easy, but it will always be beautiful." ************************* "Instant coffee and a tip from the sound-guy. I'm learning sounds, lying wide awake on different sofas every night. I know the difference between a well built wall and broken strength. I'm learning mindfulness, reading about gurus and poets every day on different trains to nowhere. I don't know what I'm learning but I hope I will understand one day. I'm selling my heart with each album and a silent prayer that they'll be gentle with it, gentle with me. And then the concerned looks they throw when I point at my worn out bag and broken guitar case as the answer to where I live. Sure I could spend a year or two selling my days and time for money, and I could buy all these things people want to have without never really needing it. It's just that when I'm on that stage every night, it all just seems so stupid. My guitar, my voice, my words, my story. That's all I want, that's what makes my heart beat. What am I supposed to do with belongings and material stuff when all I want is this. The open road and a new beginning every day."

“The most powerful spiritual healer, fixer, teacher on the planet.” —Oprah Winfrey What is the lesson in abuse, neglect, abandonment, rejection? What is the lesson when you lose someone you really love? Just what are the lessons of life's hard times? Bestselling author Iyanla Vanzant has had an amazing and difficult life—one of great challenges that unmasked her wonderful gifts and led to wisdom gained. In this simple book, she uses her own personal experiences to show how life's hardships can be re-languaged and revisioned to become lessons that teach us as we grow, heal, and learn to love. The pain of the past does not have to be today's reality. Iyanla Vanzant is an example of how yesterday's tears become the seeds of today's hope, renewal, and strength.

The first book in the New York Times bestselling epic fantasy trilogy by award-winning author Laini Taylor Around the world, black handprints are appearing on doorways, scorched there by winged strangers who have crept through a slit in the sky. In a dark and dusty shop, a devil's supply of human teeth grown dangerously low. And in the tangled lanes of Prague, a young art student is about to be caught up in a brutal otherworldly war. Meet Karou. She fills her sketchbooks with monsters that may or may not be real; she's prone to disappearing on mysterious "errands"; she speaks many languages--not all of them human; and her bright blue hair actually grows out of her head that color. Who is she? That is the question that haunts her, and she's about to find out. When one of the strangers--beautiful, haunted Akiva--fixes his fire-colored eyes on her in an alley in Marrakesh, the result is blood and starlight, secrets unveiled, and a star-crossed love whose roots drink deep of a violent past. But will Karou live to regret learning the truth about herself?

Building on her signature message of using the mind to master difficult emotions, Joyce Meyer focuses on the most destructive, insidious one of all: anger. It is responsible for broken relationships, sleepless nights, high blood pressure and ulcers. It destroys friendships, marriages and families, not to mention peace of mind. Anger is especially hard to handle for many Christians who have learned from childhood that "good Christians don't get angry." Meyer argues that properly handled, anger is an alert system that something is wrong and needs to be resolved. In her latest book, she delves into the important process of forgiving, explaining its positive impact on the roots, the forms and the results of anger. Why forgive? Joyce explains that forgiving is the only thing that can free one from the terrible turmoil that anger causes to spill over into every part of life. Meyer understands that life will never be fair, but that is not a reason to let anger destroy our well-being and health. This is her guide to navigating that thorny territory and finding true peace.