How May I Offend You Today

USA Today bestselling author Susannah B. Lewis (creator of Whoa! Susannah) is back with another hilarious take on what so many people are thinking but are afraid to say aloud. Millions of online fans have flocked to Susannah B. Lewis's hysterical, take-no-prisoners rants about her pet peeves in everyday life. Now, in How May I Offend You Today?, Lewis turns her trademark humor to ordinary events that work her nerves--from people who wear t-shirts with indecent images to public displays of affection in the plumbing aisle of Lowe's--while keeping a wry eye on herself and her own temptation to vent grievances "like a teenage girl in overalls and Birkenstocks." Weaving together anecdotes from her distinctly Southern life with frequent references to the Bible, what she calls "our manual for living," Lewis says what many of us have thought, and in the process encourages us to stand firm in our views. The witty-yet-down-to-earth banter and uplifting, inspirational message of How May I Offend You Today? gives readers everywhere the boost necessary to make it through even their most trying days.

A timely story of two teenagers who discover the power of friendship, feminism, and standing up for what you believe in, no matter where you come from. A collaboration between two gifted authors writing from alternating perspectives, this compelling novel shines with authenticity, courage, and humor. Malena Rosario is starting to believe that catastrophes come in threes. First, Hurricane María destroyed her home, taking her unbreakable spirit with it. Second, she and her mother are now stuck in Florida, which is nothing like her beloved Puerto Rico. And third, when she goes to school bra-less after a bad sunburn and is humiliated by the school administration into covering up, she feels like she has no choice but to comply. Ruby McAllister has a reputation as her school's outspoken feminist rebel. But back in Seattle, she lived under her sister’s shadow. Now her sister is teaching in underprivileged communities, and she’s in a Florida high school, unsure of what to do with her future, or if she’s even capable making a difference in the world. So when Ruby notices the new girl is being forced to cover up her chest, she is not willing to keep quiet about it. Neither Malena nor Ruby expected to be the leaders of the school's dress code rebellion. But the girls will have to face their own insecurities, biases, and privileges, and the ups and downs in their newfound friendship, if they want to stand up for their ideals and––ultimately––for themselves.

“The most delightfully, wickedly entertaining duo in crime fiction.”—The Plain Dealer When a prominent politician is crushed by a fruit van making a delivery, the singular team of Arthur Bryant and John May overcome insurmountable odds to reunite the PCU and solve the case in this brainy new mystery from acclaimed author Christopher Fowler. On a spring morning in London’s Strand, the Speaker of the House of Commons is nearly killed by a van unloading oranges and lemons for the annual St. Clement Danes celebration. It’s an absurd near-death experience, but the government is more interested in investigating the Speaker’s state of mind just prior to his accident. The task is given to the Peculiar Crimes Unit—the only problem being that the unit no longer exists. Its chief, Raymond Land, is tending his daffodils on the Isle of Wight and senior detectives Arthur Bryant and John May are out of commission—May has just undergone surgery for a bullet wound and Bryant has been missing for a month. What's more, their old office in King’s Cross is being turned into a vegetarian tapas bar. Against impossible odds, the team is reassembled and once again what should be a simple case becomes a lunatic farrago involving arson, suicide, magicians, academics and a race to catch a killer with a master plan involving London churches. Joining their team this time is Sidney, a young woman with no previous experience, plenty of attitude—and a surprising secret.

Sometimes what your life is missing is an eccentric group of older ladies to take you under their wing... When Rae Sutton's mama passes away and leaves her the house where she grew up, Rae can't imagine how the little old place might restore her broken life. Mourning the recent loss of her marriage, she takes the house and settles back into her tiny hometown with her fourteen-year-old daughter, Molly Margaret, and their overweight dog. There she’s embraced by her mother's close-knit circle of friends, the Third Thursday ladies. Though almost half their age and far less confident of positive outcomes, Rae joins their ministry-slash-book-club-slash-gossip circle and allows the women to speak wry honesty and witty humor into her tired heart. As a new career and a new romance bring their own complications, Rae relies on the unlikely family she's found and begins to wonder if her future holds more hope than she ever could have imagined. "Wise, witty, and full of Southern charm,?Bless Your Heart, Rae Sutton?is as refreshing as a tall glass of sweet tea on a hot summer day!" -Denise Hunter, bestselling author of the Riverbend Romances Sweet, stand-alone Southern contemporary women's fiction Coming soon from Susannah B. Lewis: Della & Darby

AND THIS MY PRAYER...is a revision of a 1916 prayer book called "God's Minute". The original prayers are full of wonderful thoughts but are so wordy for the modern world that they lose their impact. We have re-written them in more modern language while still keeping much of their formality. 365 short prayers that keep you in touch with the Creator. It's important in such a hectic world.

In her highly-anticipated nonfiction debut, humorist, popular blogger, and USA Today bestselling author, Susannah B. Lewis (Whoa! Susannah) uses dry wit and an eye for the absurd to find laughter in even the most challenging circumstances. Millions of online fans have flocked to Susannah B. Lewis's hysterical, take-no-prisoners videos that capture her uproarious yet deeply faithful view of the world. Now she brings to book form her keen eye for the absurd as she reveals her experiences growing up in a small Tennessee town. From the time an escaped albino panther wandered into her backyard to the Thanksgiving when an egg in the table's centerpiece hatched a baby chicken to the kind neighbors who brought casseroles in Tupperware for months—even years—after her father died when she was just eleven years old, the stories she tells delve deeply into the rich culture of the South that molded her. Clinging to the promises of God in times of grief and looking for every opportunity to laugh, Lewis is the wry yet wise girl next door who invites you to sit a spell beside her on the front porch

Mercenary King Chen Qingyang returned to the city to protect his comrade's sister. the goddess. In the bustling city, Chen Qingyang was like a fish in water, carefree and at ease. And to see how the previous generation's soldiers would use their iron fists and wits to build a business empire...

"Brother Ren, it seems that we are running out of luck this time. We just pity our child. He has just been born and will go with us. I am not reconciled!" It was the woman who spoke. Although there was a lot of blood on her body, it was still difficult to hide her almost perfect charm.