How To Be Gay

A pioneer of LGBTQ studies dares to suggest that gayness is a way of being that gay men must learn from one another to become who they are. The genius of gay culture resides in some of its most despised stereotypes—aestheticism, snobbery, melodrama, glamour, caricatures of women, and obsession with mothers—and in the social meaning of style.

No one raises an eyebrow if you suggest that a guy who arranges his furniture just so, rolls his eyes in exaggerated disbelief, likes techno music or show tunes, and knows all of Bette Davis's best lines by heart might, just possibly, be gay. But if you assert that male homosexuality is a cultural practice, expressive of a unique subjectivity and a distinctive relation to mainstream society, people will immediately protest. Such an idea, they will say, is just a stereotype-ridiculously simplistic, politically irresponsible, and morally suspect. The world acknowledges gay male culture as a fact but denies it as a truth. David Halperin, a pioneer of LGBTQ studies, dares to suggest that gayness is a specific way of being that gay men must learn from one another in order to become who they are. Inspired by the notorious undergraduate course of the same title that Halperin taught at the University of Michigan, provoking cries of outrage from both the right-wing media and the gay press, How To Be Gay traces gay men's cultural difference to the social meaning of style. Far from being deterred by stereotypes, Halperin concludes that the genius of gay culture resides in some of its most despised features: its aestheticism, snobbery, melodrama, adoration of glamour, caricatures of women, and obsession with mothers. The insights, impertinence, and unfazed critical intelligence displayed by gay culture, Halperin argues, have much to offer the heterosexual mainstream.

A Gay Man's Guide for the 90s This famous counselling guide has been extensively re-written and expanded to take into account the dramatic changes in gay life over the past three years. An essential tool for counsellors, it covers all the areas of concern: coming out, sex, relationships, health, AIDS and the law. '...a splendid book, honestly felt, honestly written and presented. It's jam-packed with common-sense advice and should leave all readers feeling much more relaxed about themselves and their lives.'...

Every parent's guide to raising a straight child. Who wants to have a gay kid in their family? You don't! That's why you and your spouse need this guide so you know how to raise your kid to keep them from going down the wrong path that leads directly to the same sex. This guide has all the tools you will need to make wise decisions. There are tips and hints, as well as, information on research regarding homosexuality both in the animal kingdom and the human population. With over 700 million homosexuals in the world, this is a growing phenomenon that this guide will stop in it's tracks. Within a few hundred years, this guide will reduce the homosexual population in half according to my ten year old daughter who was using a calculator to figure this out. Get this guide now!

For much of the 20th century, American gays and lesbians lived in fear that public exposure of their sexualities might cause them to be fired, blackmailed, or even arrested. Today, they are enjoying an unprecedented number of legal rights and protections. Clearly, the tides have shifted for gays and lesbians, but what caused this enormous sea change? In his gripping new book, Walter Frank offers an in-depth look at the court cases that were pivotal in establishing gay rights. But he also tells the story of those individuals who were willing to make waves by fighting for those rights, taking enormous personal risks at a time when the tide of public opinion was against them. Frank’s accessible style brings complex legal issues down to earth but, as a former litigator, never loses sight of the law’s human dimension and the context of the events occurring outside the courtroom. Chronicling the past half-century of gay and lesbian history, Law and the Gay Rights Story offers a unique perspective on familiar events like the Stonewall Riots, the AIDS crisis, and the repeal of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell.” Frank pays special attention to the constitutional issues surrounding same-sex marriage and closely analyzes the two recent Supreme Court cases addressing the issue. While a strong advocate for gay rights, Frank also examines critiques of the movement, including some coming from the gay community itself. Comprehensive in coverage, the book explains the legal and constitutional issues involved in each of the major goals of the gay rights movement: a safe and healthy school environment, workplace equality, an end to anti-gay violence, relationship recognition, and full integration into all the institutions of the larger society, including marriage and military service. Drawing from extensive archival research and from decades of experience as a practicing litigator, Frank not only provides a vivid history, but also shows where the battle for gay rights might go from here.

Many guide books have been written for gay men, whether they are about sex, family or lifestyle. But how does one manage to be gay with poise and confidence? If anyone has the answer to this question, it must be David Leddick: He has been a self-confident gay man for some decades now. He was friends with Quentin Crisp and worked as a chorus dancer for Maria Callas. Today, Leddick is to some extent an ambassador for gay life. How to be Gay is wise and witty - and none of the essential questions remains unanswered.

How To Be a Real Gay takes its title from a series of workshops organized by gay activists in the small town of Ermelo, South Africa. Focusing on everyday practices of gayness in hair salons, churches, taverns, and meeting halls, the book explores the ambivalent space that homosexuality occupies in the newly democratic South Africa: on the one hand, protection of gay rights is a litmus test for the country's constitutional democracy, yet on the other, homosexuality is seen to threaten traditional values, customs, and beliefs. The book is the first to emerge that recounts how gays in small-town South Africa negotiate this difficult symbolic terrain. How do discourses on international gay and lesbian social movements and gay equality hang together with local views on identity, gender, and relationships? Why do small-town gays harness fashion, style, and glamour in the making and sustaining of identity? How do economically vulnerable gays organize, access resources, and create networks linking small towns to cities? How To Be a Real Gay delves to the core of what it means to be 'the other' in contexts of risk, exclusion, and inclusion. In its richly textured way, the book also speaks to the tremendous capacity of gays to imagine and create life-worlds in a harsh environment.

This book is an invaluable resource manual and survival guide for gay men who often turn to peers, parents, educators, or the media for direction, only to encounter misleading myths about gay life, such as the notion that "coming out solves everything." For some gay men being homosexual is often anything but "gay." What are typically assumed to be "gay attributes" are often not characteristics of being gay but symptoms of common emotional disorders in gay men. In this insightful book, longtime psychiatrist Martin Kantor—who is himself a gay man and has been in a committed relationship for 27 years—documents the issues associated with coming out and the challenges of gay relationships, including friendship, marriage, "getting dumped," and sexuality, with unflinching and honest candor. He also addresses the emotional problems and pervasive sense of loneliness that frequently haunt gay men while examining subcultural issues which exist within the gay community, including ageism. Other topics include developing a gay lifestyle (being gay in a certain way), parental relationships, issues of midlife and aging, and therapy and self-help options for gay men who feel they need it.