I Am Bride

“One of the best books for brides . . . Her satirical, tongue-in-cheek take on making your wedding all about yourself will offer some much-needed laughs.” —Real Simple In this bridal gag gift, Upright Citizens Brigade comedian Laura Willcox writes in the voice of an overbearing, outrageous wedding planner, covering all aspects of a wedding—from the moment of engagement (hopefully with the ring you’ve been not so subtly emailing him about for months), all the way through the final minutes of the big day. Accompanied by Jason O’Malley’s humorous illustrations, Willcox offers tongue-in-cheek advice for every wedding-planning moment, whether it’s dreaming up the perfect wedding-weekend hashtag, planning a gift registry to make everyone jealous of your fabulous lifestyle, or figuring out how to distance yourself from the poor, unfortunate souls who didn’t make the cut for your guest list. Laura Willcox’s refreshing take on all things bride will turn tradition on its head, and have you rolling your eyes and reading passages out loud to your engaged (and married) friends. This funny book is a perfect gift for the friend who can’t stop pinning to her dream wedding board, bridezilla-to-be, or any bride who would benefit from a much-needed break from the stress and madness of wedding planning. “Perfectly mocks the absurd wedding-planning industry. Whether you’re having a big wedding to prove something to your ex, or a small wedding to make your loved ones feel excluded, this book will make you laugh through the overwhelming planning process.” —Lauren Lapkus, actor and comedian

For budget brides, including fans of TheBrokeAssBride.com, this is a definitive guide to saving money and making every dollar count during wedding planning, from the engagement party to the big day, without sacrificing style or personality. Brides-to-be, do you dream of rocking a wedding full of personality, pizzazz, and style, without compromising your dreams or kissing your budget goodbye? Well, bust out your happy dance because today is your lucky day...you're holding the key in your newly-betrothed hands! In the pages of this witty guide, Dana LaRue, creator of thebrokeassbride.com, shares hundreds of tips and anecdotes for getting the most bang for your buck, celebrating your personality as a couple, and making wedding planning fun. She includes: · The top 14 money-saving rules for choosing your location, dress, menu, and music—and most important of all, enjoying the day · Engagement party and rehearsal dinner ideas that won’t break the bank · 4 tips for finding your dream theme · Sample budget breakdowns ($1,000; $5,000; $10,000; $15,000; and beyond) showing where couples saved and splurged · Her very own road-tested advice for becoming a negotiation ninja · 7 ways to keep your booze budget under control · DIY décor projects and recipes you can make without risking a bridezilla meltdown · Online planning shortcuts, tools to find savings, and helpful websites for organization and style inspiration

From the country’s foremost expert on “cold feet,” a smart and compassionate guide for the bride-to-be who thinks she should be blissfully happy—but is freaking out instead For most brides, the elation of engagement is accompanied by a cocktail of unexpected emotions: Anxiety about making a lifelong commitment. Sadness about leaving their single life behind. Confusion when even simple decisions—should we serve chicken cordon bleu or beef Wellington?—bring them to tears. Worst of all, since everyone around them expects them to be happy, few brides feel there’s anyone to turn to with these conflicting feelings. Written by one of Modern Bride’s “25 Trendsetters of 2006”—and targeting the 2.5 million women who get engaged each year—Emotionally Engagedis the only book geared toward helping brides survive their engagements and emerge as stronger, happier, better- adjusted married women. In the book, Allison Moir-Smith shares her threestage, tried-and-true process from her workshops and individual therapy sessions, along with the stories of over a dozen brides-to-be and newlyweds, helping readers transform their bridal blues into bridal bliss.

The true story of how one Muslim woman shaped her own fate and escaped her forced wedding. Sumaiya Matin was never sure if the story of the Shaytan Bride was truth or myth. When she moved at age six from Dhaka, Bangladesh, to Thunder Bay, Ontario, recollections of this devilish bride followed her. At first, the Shaytan Bride seemed to be the monster of fairy tales, a woman possessed or seduced by a jinni. But everything changes during a family trip to Bangladesh, and in the weeks leading to Sumaiya’s own forced wedding, she discovers that the story — and the bride herself — are much closer than they seem. The Shaytan Bride is the true coming-of-age story of a girl navigating desire and faith. Through her journey into adulthood, she battles herself and her circumstances to differentiate between destiny and free will. Sumaiya Matin’s life in love and violence is a testament to one woman’s strength as she faces the complicated fallout of her decisions. A RARE MACHINES BOOK

Unenthused by a white wedding gown and bored by the hoopla of the Hollywood-style reception, Ariel Meadow Stallings found herself absolutely exhausted with the nuances of traditional nuptials . . . so she chose to take a walk off the beaten aisle. In this updated edition of Offbeat Bride, Stallings humorously recounts the story of the original offbeat wedding-hers-and shares anecdotes and advice from dozens of other nontraditional couples. She also includes a chapter on budget weddings in today's weak economy, along with sidebars, tips, tricks, and planner encouragement to help you figure out your special day. What results is a combination of hilarious wedding stories and tons of helpful how-tos-a perfect mash-up of memoir and handbook. At once practical and enjoyable, Offbeat Bride validates choosing the funky, different, and offbeat over the traditional, and leads couples through the planning process-from unique ideas on how to announce their engagement all the way to answering the question, "So, how's married life?" Stallings is the ultimate guide to the alternative wedding of your dreams, and with Offbeat Bride, she brings you a book that serves both as an encouragement and celebration of aisles less traveled.

Once I was a sane, levelheaded professional woman. Then I said “yes.” Now I am the lunatic bride I always made fun of! What is it about getting married that turns normal people into total freaks? A savvy, riotously funny novel, Diary of a Mad Bride is for anyone who has ever been a bride, is about to become a bride, yearned to be a bride, or suffered the sheer indignity of appearing in public in the world’s ugliest bridesmaid dress.... My wedding was starting in less than twenty minutes, and I was stuck in a 7-Eleven parking lot with popcorn kernels wedged in my gums and vanilla ice cream melting on my dress. It was a disaster too large to comprehend. After an agonizing year spent planning my wedding, could it really end like this? The voices chronicling a year of wedding hysteria swirled in my head.... — My grandmother upon viewing my engagement ring: “What do you mean he gave you an emerald! Diamonds are eternal, emeralds say, maybe five years.” — My future father-in-law on the night of my engagement party: “To a happy marriage and, if necessary, a painless divorce!” — My best friend, Anita: “Oh, screw congratulations. Of course I’m happy for you. Stephen’s a major piece of ass and he’s got a sense of humor. Just as long as you’re certain this is what you want.” Would I survive this day after all....?

With over 50,000 copies sold of the original edition, A Bride's Book has been a best-selling resource for brides-to-be since 2001, offering floral designer and wedding planner Marsha Heckman's expert guidance on everything from the engagement to the post-honeymoon thank-you notes. Now Heckamn has returned with a revised, redesigned, and updated edition for the modern bride. It includes seven gorgeous new wedding bouquet tabs with complete how-to instructiuons, along with a new cover design. Lavishly illustrated with full-color photographs by Richard Jung from Marsha Heckman's best-selling book Bouquets: A Year of Flowers for the Bride, A Bride's Book is both a hardworking wedding planner and a personal journal. The book is filled with tips for the bride, wedding traditions, and marriage customs. Spiral bound to open flat, with an elastic closure and an inside pocket, A Bride's Book is organized into six sections with fill-in space and prompts to help keep the busy bride organized: "To Do," "Calendar," "Wedding Party," "Key People," "Guests," and "Journal & Keepsake."

"This book is about taking the head off an evil witch". With these words Marion Woodman begins her spiral journey, a powerful and authoritative look at the psychology and attitudes of modern women. Marion Woodman continues her remarkable exploration of women's mysteries through case material, dreams, literature and mythology, in food rituals, rape symbolism, Christianity, imagery in the body, sexuality, creativity and relationships.