I Bitch Therefore I Am

A third volume in the popular series of humor collections brings together sixty full-color advertising images from the 1940s through the 1960s with hilarious sayings that address such topics as love, motherhood, orgasms, politics, menopause, religion, and chocolate, among other topics.

Let Gilligan's Island teach you about situational ethics. Learn about epistemology from The Brady Bunch. Explore Aristotle's Poetics by watching 24. Television has grappled with a wide range of philosophical conundrums. According to the networks, it's the ultimate source of all knowledge in the universe! So why not look to the small screen for answers to all of humanity's dilemmas? There's not a single issue discussed by the great thinkers of the past that hasn't been hashed out between commercials in shows like Mad Men and Leave It to Beaver. So fix yourself a snack, settle into the couch, grab the remote...and prepare to be enlightened.

Dwight Perry of the Seattle Times says, "Laughter, tears, and the indomitable spirit - they're front and center as Jerry Perisho details his very personal war with prostate cancer." Jerry Perisho has been a CEO or senior officer with various southern California corporations since 1982. Additionally, he is a professional freelance comedy writer who created and operated a very successful joke writing business. When he was diagnosed with prostate cancer in 2004 at the age of 52, he discovered that his cockeyed view of the world and his sense of humor helped him survive the surgery, chemotherapy and two years of hormone therapy that were to follow. In fact, he flourished. This is his tender and hilarious story of the tears, the fears and the many funny things and amazing people he has encountered since cancer entered his personal world.

Once again there's good news for those of us who rage at the evening news, shake our heads at Washington's business-as-usual, or watch as politicians carom helplessly between political crises and sex scandals: Dennis Miller is back with his third installment of hilarious observations, I Rant, Therefore I Am. Dennis Miller first gained national acclaim as the wise-guy anchor of "Weekend Update" on "Saturday Night Live." When HBO premiered his weekly talk show in April 1994, both critics and fans enthusiastically agreed: "Dennis Miller Live" was the most refreshing talk show on television. The accolades have continued to pour in. In September 1994, Dennis and his staff won an Emmy Award for writing and have been regularly nominated since. When he takes the stage, the audience demands, "The rants, the rants, the rants," and once again, Dennis Miller delivers the goods. Fans of his smart, quirky, irreverent style of humor are in for another treat-this set of rants is even funnier than the last two rounds. Dennis Miller keeps on ranting in I Rant, Therefore I Am, and speaks his mind on topics like: MODELS-"How ironic that the most exquisite-looking people in the world should end up choosing the profession that requires them to spend all day by the phone waiting for the most hideous people to call them." COLLEGE-"I don't think you should have to pay back college loans unless you get a job in your field. Put some pressure on the school. If I can't pay my bills, I'm not paying yours." CONSUMERS-"You know how to tell when you've got a shopping problem? When the lights in the department store momentarily dim after they slide your credit card through the thing." FAITH-"I envy people who can just let go and totally commit. I, on the other hand, can't even hear the title of the show 'Touched by an Angel' without thinking that a professional baseball player is being sued for sexual harassment." ASTRONAUTS-"Anybody who would strap themselves onto a giant deodorant spray can, set off a series of explosions under their ass until they've been blasted into the icy vacuum of deep space, and then step outside to take a walk must have more balls than a twenty-four-hour Tokyo driving range."

First came fire, the wheel, and penicillin...and then, according to Dylan Jones, a compulsive album collector, music journalist, and multi award-winning men's magazine editor, the next great invention to bless the human race was the iPod, Apple's groundbreaking mp3 player. Small, sleek, and sexy, but with the capacity to hold up to ten thousand songs, the iPod has stunned music lovers and gadget enthusiasts around the world. It has delighted indie-rock college kids and elderly jazz fans, classical musical buffs and teenage hip-hop hustlers, almost no technology has so seamlessly crossed the great divide. In iPod, Therefore I Am, Jones tells the story of his own entrée into this exponentially growing cult, taking the reader on a hilariously candid journey through his lifelong addiction to all genres of music, however unfashionable. Along the way, he gives a tantalizing behind-the-scenes look at the genesis of the iPod, from its original conception by Steve Jobs, the man who famously reinvented Apple Computer, to the landmark design of Jonathan Ive, the innovative designer who has become a legend in his own time. Behind it all, we get an insight into the way that the iPod has radically transformed the way we approach music, listen to music, and possess music-turning all of us into curators. Appendices containing Jones's top playlists and his expert tips on getting the most out of your iPod make this love song to the iPod as practical as it is entertaining.

Finally, a book that delves into the warped and obsessive mind of today's golfer. Whether your idea of golf is an occasional round with fellow duffers at the local muni or frequent forays to far-flung courses in search of the perfect round, you'll identify with this book like no other. Popular golf humorist George Fuller will have you laughing as he makes light of the idiosyncrasies of otherwise sane people who are addicted to this holy, wholly frustrating game. I Golf, Therefore I Am—Nuts! brings out the humor in situations that all golfers can relate to: -Looking for Mulligan, the patron saint of forgiveness -The hype architects and developers use when describing a new course -Quirks, quips, and superstitions from the PGA Tour If your eyes light up every time you read about a new driver, your TiVo has golf programming that originally aired in 2004, you receive holiday cards from greenskeepers, or your golf wardrobe doubles as business casual, then I Golf, Therefore I Am—Nuts! is for you.

My name is Amber Reynolds. There are three things you should know about me: 1. I’m in a coma. 2. My husband doesn’t love me anymore. 3. Sometimes I lie. Amber wakes up in a hospital. She can’t move. She can’t speak. She can’t open her eyes. She can hear everyone around her, but they have no idea. Amber doesn’t remember what happened, but she has a suspicion her husband had something to do with it. Alternating between her paralyzed present, the week before her accident, and a series of childhood diaries from twenty years ago, this brilliant psychological thriller asks: Is something really a lie if you believe it's the truth?

When a woman acts assertively, makes demands, and struggles for what she wants, she is labeled a bitch. The secret is to know when and how to turn on (or turn off) that "bitch switch." Not being able to locate your "switch" leaves you open to being a victim; not knowing how to turn it off will get you a label that is hard to shake. From Omarosa, reality star, global television personality, and the prime-time woman you love to hate, comes The Bitch Switch, the smart and bitingly honest must-read for every woman who aspires to succeed in relationships, in business, and at home.