I Hate Myself And Want To Die

For Anna Young, stabbing at her veins with a needle was a normal part of life. Its what she had wanted since she learned in seventh grade that her idols were heroin addicts. She strived to become a junkie and was successful. In I Hate Myself and Want to Die, Young recounts her struggles with drugs, suicide, and bipolar disorder. Honest and self-disclosing, Young narrates the intimate details of her drug use and the path to addiction, her time spent in jail and detox, the ravages of withdrawal, her efforts to rehabilitate, her unsuccessful attempts to commit suicide, and her diagnosis with bipolar disorder. This memoir provides a behind-the-scenes and firsthand look at the trials of drug addiction, its wide-reaching effects, and the very real challenge of recovery. I walk into my new cell; it is lockdown after lunch I lay my head down to ease my headache from the bright lights. I just sit in my bed and shake, sweat, and groan. Once in a while I drift off to sleep. I dream about Elle and getting high, and then I am startled awake. I stare at the ceiling looking for a spot to hang myself.

Does the opening "pling pling plinggg" of Bette Midler's The Rose fill you with existential dread? Do you cringe at the mere whiff of what Phil Collins is spewing In the Air Tonight? Have you ever bolted from a restaurant because Celine Dion's cover of All By Myself was threatening to drive you over the edge? Well, turn around, bright eyes because Tom Reynolds is here with I HATE MYSELF AND WANT TO DIE, a laugh-out-loud-til-youre sobbing compendium of the world's most hideously depressing pop songs and a guide to what makes them so heartwrenchingly, earsplittingly sad and bad. With chapters like I Was a Teenage Car Crash, Im Trying to be Profound and Touching but Really Suck At It, Perfect Storms, and I Mope, Therefore I Am, Reynolds details the history of melodic misery, from the days of Bobby Darin to the era of Evanescence. Complete with a ranked Countdown of Doom and wonderfully dreary drawings, I HATE MYSELF AND WANT TO DIE is the one book that fans and foes of woeful tunes wont want to live without.

A compassionate, shame-free guide for your darkest days “A one-of-a-kind book . . . to read for yourself or give to a struggling friend or loved one without the fear that depression and suicidal thoughts will be minimized, medicalized or over-spiritualized.”—Kay Warren, cofounder of Saddleback Church What happens when loving Jesus doesn’t cure you of depression, anxiety, or suicidal thoughts? You might be crushed by shame over your mental illness, only to be told by well-meaning Christians to “choose joy” and “pray more.” So you beg God to take away the pain, but nothing eases the ache inside. As darkness lingers and color drains from your world, you’re left wondering if God has abandoned you. You just want a way out. But there’s hope. In I Love Jesus, But I Want to Die, Sarah J. Robinson offers a healthy, practical, and shame-free guide for Christians struggling with mental illness. With unflinching honesty, Sarah shares her story of battling depression and fighting to stay alive despite toxic theology that made her afraid to seek help outside the church. Pairing her own story with scriptural insights, mental health research, and simple practices, Sarah helps you reconnect with the God who is present in our deepest anguish and discover that you are worth everything it takes to get better. Beautifully written and full of hard-won wisdom, I Love Jesus, But I Want to Die offers a path toward a rich, hope-filled life in Christ, even when healing doesn’t look like what you expect.

NATIONAL BESTSELLER SHORTLISTED FOR THE HILARY WESTON WRITERS' TRUST PRIZE FOR NONFICTION Award-winning journalist Anna Mehler Paperny's stunning memoir chronicles with courageous honesty and uncommon eloquence her experience of depression and her quest to explore what we know and don't know about this disease that afflicts almost a fifth of the population--providing an invaluable guide to a system struggling to find solutions. As fascinating as it is heartrending, as outrageously funny as it is serious, it is a must-read for anyone impacted by depression--and that's pretty much everybody. Depression is a havoc-wreaking illness that masquerades as personal failing and hijacks your life. After a major suicide attempt in her early twenties, Anna Mehler Paperny resolved to put her reporter's skills to use to get to know her enemy, setting off on a journey to understand her condition, the dizzying array of medical treatments on offer and a medical profession in search of answers. Charting the way depression wrecks so many, she maps competing schools of therapy, pharmacology, cutting-edge medicine, the pill-popping pitfalls of long-term treatment, the glaring unknowns and the institutional shortcomings that both patients and practitioners are up against. She interviews leading medical experts across Canada and the US, from psychiatrists to neurologists, brain-mapping pioneers to family practitioners, and others dabbling in strange hypotheses--and shares compassionate conversations with fellow sufferers. Hello I Want to Die Please Fix Me tracks Anna's quest for knowledge and her desire to get well. Impeccably reported, it is a profoundly compelling story about the human spirit and the myriad ways we treat (and fail to treat) the disease that accounts for more years swallowed up by disability than any other in the world.

A collection of 20 original, unstinting essays by the young YouTube vlogger and creator of Not Cool shares intimate insights into his personal life, highlighting moments from his childhood, his rise on YouTube and his experiences as a filmmaker. Original.

This is a frank, compassionate book written to those who contemplate suicide as a way out of their situations. The author issues an invitation to life, helping people accept the imperfections of their lives, and opening eyes to the possibilities of love.

From the author of the bestselling Anam Cara comes a beautiful collection of blessings to help readers through both the everyday and the extraordinary events of their lives. John O’Donohue, Irish teacher and poet, has been widely praised for his gift of drawing on Celtic spiritual traditions to create words of inspiration and wisdom for today. In To Bless the Space Between Us, his compelling blend of elegant, poetic language and spiritual insight offers readers comfort and encouragement on their journeys through life. O’Donohue looks at life’s thresholds—getting married, having children, starting a new job—and offers invaluable guidelines for making the transition from a known, familiar world into a new, unmapped territory. Most profoundly, however, O’Donohue explains “blessing” as a way of life, as a lens through which the whole world is transformed. O’Donohue awakens readers to timeless truths and shows the power they have to answer contemporary dilemmas and ease us through periods of change.

“An entertaining rant…The only thing missing is the sound of a drumroll and cymbals to feel as though one is sitting in a nightclub watching a live comedy marathon…A raucous, biting look at life.”—Kirkus Reviews “Nobody, but nobody, can hate like Joan Rivers. It is a gift. It is also shocking, the things she makes us laugh at…Joan Rivers is extraordinary, but she's not for the easily offended—or for anyone who gets offended at all.”—People Joan Rivers, comedienne, actress, jewelry monger, and an award-winning international star (she can sneer in eight different languages) lives by her own golden rule: Do unto others before they do unto you—and for God’s sakes, do it funny! Her career in comedy may have begun with self-loathing, but, after looking at the human decrepitude around her, she figured Why stop here when there are so many other things to hate? With all of her diverse experiences, Joan has looked down at, turned away from, and thrown up over a lot of hateful things, deplorable places, and despicable people. Thank God she took notes. Here—uncensored and uninhibited—Joan says exactly what’s on her mind…And HER mind is a terrible thing to waste. She proudly kicks the crap out of ugly children, dating rituals, funerals, and lousy restaurants. She nails First Ladies, closet cases, and hypocrites to the wall. She shows no mercy towards doctors and feminists, and even goes after Anne Frank and Stephen Hawking. Joan lets everyone—including herself—have it in this one hundred percent honest and unabashedly hilarious love letter to the hater in all of us.