Love For Imperfect Things

Susan Cain, New York Times bestselling author of Quiet: "The world could surely use a little more love, a little more compassion, and a little more wisdom. In Love for Imperfect Things, Haemin Sunim shows us how to cultivate all three, and to find beauty in the most imperfect of things--including your very own self." A #1 internationally bestselling book of spiritual wisdom about learning to love ourselves, with all our imperfections, by the Buddhist author of The Things You Can See Only When You Slow Down Hearing the words "be good to yourself first, then to others" was like being struck by lightning. Many of us respond to the pressures of life by turning inward and ignoring problems, sometimes resulting in anxiety or depression. Others react by working harder at the office, at school, or at home, hoping that this will make ourselves and the people we love happier. But what if being yourself is enough? Just as we are advised on airplanes to take our own oxygen first before helping others, we must first be at peace with ourselves before we can be at peace with the world around us. In this beautiful follow-up to his international bestseller The Things You Can See Only When You Slow Down, Zen Buddhist monk Haemin Sunim turns his trademark wisdom to the art of self-care, arguing that only by accepting yourself--and the flaws that make you who you are--can you have compassionate and fulfilling relationships with your partner, your family, and your friends. With more than thirty-five full-color illustrations, Love for Imperfect Things will appeal to both your eyes and your heart, and help you learn to love yourself, your life, and everyone in it. When you care for yourself first, the world begins to find you worthy of care.

"Does for mental clutter what Marie Kondo has done for household clutter." --Publishers Weekly Relax and find happiness amid the swirl of the modern world with this internationally bestselling guide to simplifying your life by the renowned Zen Buddhist author of Don’t Worry. In clear, practical, easily adopted lessons--one a day for 100 days--renowned Buddhist monk Shunmyo Masuno draws on centuries of wisdom to teach you to Zen your life. Discover how . . . Lesson #4: lining up your shoes after you take them off can bring order to your mind; Lesson #11: putting down your fork after every bite can help you feel more grateful for what you have; Lesson #18: immersing yourself in zazen can sweep the clutter from your mind; Lesson #23: joining your hands together in gassho can soothe irritation and conflict; Lesson #27: going outside to watch the sunset can make every day feel celebratory; Lesson #42: planting a flower and watching it grow can teach you to embrace change; Lesson #67: understanding the concept of ichi-go ichi-e can make everyday interactions more meaningful; Lesson #85: practicing chisoku can help you feel more fulfilled. A minimalist line drawing appears opposite each lesson on an otherwise blank page, giving you an opportunity to relax with a deep breath between lessons. With each daily practice, you will learn to find happiness not by seeking out extraordinary experiences but by making small changes to your life, opening yourself up to a renewed sense of peace and inner calm. A PENGUIN LIFE TITLE

While most of us have moments of loving freely and openly, it is often hard to sustain this where it matters most—in our intimate relationships. Why if love is so great and powerful are human relationships so challenging and difficult? If love is the source of happiness and joy, why is it so hard to open to it fully and let it govern our lives? In this book, John Welwood addresses these questions and shows us how to overcome the most fundamental obstacle that keeps us from experiencing love's full flowering in our lives. Perfect Love, Imperfect Relationships begins by showing how all our relational problems arise out of a universal, core wounding around love that affects not only our personal relationships but the quality of life in our world as a whole. This wounding shows up as a pervasive mood of unlove—a deep sense that we are not intrinsically lovable just as we are. And this shuts down our capacity to trust, so that even though we may hunger for love, we have difficulty opening to it and letting it circulate freely through us. This book takes the reader on a powerful journey of healing and transformation that involves learning to embrace our humanness and appreciate the imperfections of our relationships as trail-markers along the path to great love. It sets forth a process for releasing deep-seated grievances we hold against others for not loving us better and against ourselves for not being better loved. And it shows how our longing to be loved can magnetize the great love that will free us from looking to others to find ourselves. Written with penetrating realism and a fresh, lyrical style that honors the subtlety and richness of our relationship to love itself, this revolutionary book offers profound and practical guidance for healing our lives as well as our embattled world.

An elegantly packaged "pocket-size" guide to weathering life's storms "As founder and guilding teacher of the Community Meditation Center in New York, Allan Lokos has an arsenal of tools for coping with stressful situations." —Rachel Lee Harris, New York Times We live in a turbulent world in which we are often forced to respond on a dime to challenging or even life-altering situations. To react wisely in difficult moments one needs to be quick on one's feet, but also quick of mind. In Pocket Peace, interfaith minister and Buddhist practitioner Reverend Allan Lokos provides readers with concise yet incisive daily "pocket practices" that will enable them to act in accordance with their truest and best selves. If you want to run a marathon, you must train slowly and purposefully for months. Likewise, if you want to be your best self and learn to confront whatever comes your way with kindness, compassion, and generosity, you need to . . . practice. This elegantly packaged little book is full of wisdom and teachings the reader can literally pull from their pocket each day. A small yet powerful spiritual companion that intertwines personal anecdotes and age-old wisdom with practical guidance, Pocket Peace sets readers on the path to inner peace and lasting happiness.

In this life-changing book, acclaimed Buddhist teacher Dzogchen Ponlop Rinpoche shows how to free yourself from being a victim of your emotions by gaining the awareness and understanding that will help you harness their power. Emotions bring color and meaning to our lives, but they can also put us on an exhausting rollercoaster ride that takes us to blissful peak states, the depths of delusion and despair, and everything in between. It is only by learning to relate to our emotions skillfully that we benefit from their richness and glean wisdom, rather than letting them control us. Emotions get their power from a simple but deep-seated source: our lack of self-knowledge. When we bring awareness to our experience of emotions, something truly amazing happens—they lose their power to make us miserable. In this book, Rinpoche leads us through the three steps of his Emotional Rescue Plan. Mindful Gap is the practice of creating a safe distance between you and your emotions, which gives you the psychological space to work with their energy. Clear Seeing involves recognizing the bigger picture. Last, Letting Go is the practice of releasing stressful physical and emotional energy through exercise, relaxation, and awareness. With each step, we become increasingly familiar with the inner workings of our emotions, seeing straight to the heart of anger, fear, passion, jealousy, and pride. With time and practice, instead of leading us astray, our emotions become our guide towards living a more compassionate, creative, and fulfilling life.

Buddhist teacher Dzogchen Ponlop offers advice on training one's mind and understanding one's nature in order to overcome fear and unhappiness.

Joyful Mending shows you how to repair and improve old items of clothing by turning tears and flaws into beautiful features. Simply by applying a few easy sewing, darning, felting, or crocheting techniques, as well as some sashiko and other favorite embroidery stitches, you can repair your favorite pieces in a transformative way. Along with her own philosophy of mindfullness and Wabi-Sabi mending, author Noriko Misumi teaches you how to: Repair any kind of fabric that is torn, ripped or stained--whether knitted or woven Work with damaged flat or curved surfaces to make them aesthetically pleasing again Create repairs that blend in, as well as bold or whimsical visible repairs Darn your handmade or expensive gloves, sweaters and socks to make them look great again The joy to be found in working with your hands and the personal artistry you discover within yourself lie at the heart of this book. While nothing lasts forever, there's pleasure, as well as purpose, in appreciating age and imperfection. Joyful Mending allows you to surround yourself with the things that truly give you joy, whether they were given to you by a loved one, picked up in your travels or simply have a special place in your heart.

'Required reading ... Brock Bastian expertly picks apart the fundamental idea that humans thrive when they approach pleasure and avoid pain, explaining why hardship sometimes yields richer lives that are laden with meaning, deep social connections, and unexpected bliss' Adam Alter, author of Drunk Tank Pink In today's culture, happiness has become the new marker of success, while hardships are viewed as personal weaknesses, or problems to be fixed. We increasingly try to eradicate pain through medication and by insulating ourselves from risk and offence, despite being the safest generation to have ever lived. Yet in his research, renowned social psychologist Brock Bastian has found that suffering and sadness are neither antithetical to happiness nor incidental to it: they are a necessary ingredient for emotional well-being. Drawing on psychology, neuroscience and internationally acclaimed findings from Bastian's own lab, The Other Side of Happiness encourages us to take a more fearless approach to living. The most thrilling moments of our lives are often balanced on a knife edge between pleasure and pain, whether it is finding your true love, holding your new-born for the first time, finishing a marathon or even plunging into an icy sea. This is because pain and the threat of loss quite literally increase our capacity for happiness, as Bastian reveals, making us stronger, more resilient, more connected to other people and more attuned to what truly matters. Pain even makes us more mindful, since in our darkest moments we are especially focused and aware of the world around us. Our addiction to positivity and the pursuit of pleasure is actually making us miserable. Brock Bastian shows that, without some pain, we have no real way to achieve and appreciate the kind of happiness that is true and transcendent.