Men Don T Cry

A tender and refreshing tale of family life, clashing cultures and belonging in France.

Grieving Beyond Gender: Understanding the Ways Men and Women Mourn is a revision of Men Don’t Cry, Women Do: Transcending Gender Stereotypes of Grief. In this work, Doka and Martin elaborate on their conceptual model of "styles or patterns of grieving" – a model that has generated both research and acceptance since the publication of the first edition in 1999. In that book, as well as in this revision, Doka and Martin explore the different ways that individuals grieve, noting that gender is only one factor that affects an individual’s style or pattern of grief. The book differentiates intuitive grievers, where the pattern is more affective, from instrumental grievers, who grieve in a more cognitive and behavioral way, while noting other patterns that might be more blended or dissonant. The model is firmly grounded in social science theory and research. A particular strength of the work is the emphasis placed on the clinical implications of the model on the ways that different types of grievers might best be supported through individual counseling or group support.

Boys Don't Cry is a book that will make sense of depression and anxiety for people who might not recognise those feelings in themselves or others. Suicide is the single biggest killer of men aged 20-45 in the UK. Depression and undiagnosed mental illness are huge contributors to these deaths as they're often more difficult to diagnose in men. And those men don't tend to talk about the typical symptoms or visit their doctor. Meet Tim. For nearly a decade he kept his depression secret. It made him feel so weak and shameful he thought it would destroy his whole life if anyone found out. And Tim is not alone. After finally opening up he realised that mental illness was affecting many men around the globe - and he knew that wasn't ok. A brutally honest, wickedly warming and heart-breaking tale about what it really takes to be a 'real man', written by one who decided that he wanted to change the world by no longer being silent. This is Tim's story, but it could be yours too.

As a leader in teaching, training, and transforming boys in Detroit, Jason Wilson shares his own story of discovering what it means to “be a man” in this life-changing memoir. His grandfather’s lynching in the deep South, the murders of his two older brothers, and his verbally harsh and absent father all worked together to form Jason Wilson’s childhood. But it was his decision to acknowledge his emotions and yield to God’s call on his life that made Wilson the man and leader he is today. As the founder of one of the country’s most esteemed youth organizations, Wilson has decades of experience in strengthening the physical, mental, and emotional spirit of boys and men. In Cry Like a Man, Wilson explains the dangers men face in our culture’s definition of “masculinity” and gives readers hope that healing is possible. As Wilson writes, “My passion is to help boys and men find strength to become courageously transparent about their own brokenness as I shed light on the symptoms and causes of childhood trauma and ‘father wounds.’ I long to see men free themselves from emotional incarceration—to see their minds renewed, souls weaned, and relationships restored.”

We take for granted the idea that white, middle-class, straight masculinity connotes total control of emotions, emotional inexpressivity, and emotional isolation. That men repress their feelings as they seek their fortunes in the competitive worlds of business and politics seems to be a given. This collection of essays by prominent literary and cultural critics rethinks such commonly held views by addressing the history and politics of emotion in prevailing narratives about masculinity. How did the story of the emotionally stifled U.S. male come into being? What are its political stakes? Will the "release" of straight, white, middle-class masculine emotion remake existing forms of power or reinforce them? This collection forcefully challenges our most entrenched ideas about male emotion. Through readings of works by Thoreau, Lowell, and W. E. B. Du Bois, and of twentieth century authors such as Hemingway and Kerouac, this book questions the persistence of the emotionally alienated male in narratives of white middle-class masculinity and addresses the political and social implications of male emotional release.

Do men and women grieve differently? This text, while emphasizing that there are many ways to cope with grief, offers a refreshing change from the popular gender stereotypes of grief. Two patterns of grieving are described: an intuitive pattern where individuals experience and express grief in an affective way (stereotyped as female); and an instrumental pattern where grief is expressed physically or cognitively (stereotyped as male). A third pattern representing a blending of these two is also introduced. Of critical importance is that such patterns are related to, but not determined by, gender; and each has distinct strengths and weaknesses. Organized into three main parts, this topical new text begins by defining terms, introducing and delineating the grief patterns, and rooting the book's concept in contemporary theories of grief. The second part speculates on factors that may influence individuals' patterns of coping with loss (e.g., personality, gender, culture, etc.). The final part considers implications and therapeutic interventions likely to be effective with different types of grievers.

A Black teacher searches for himself across the United States in this “emotive, brave” (Daily Mail, London) story for all of us who have fantasized about escaping our daily lives and starting over. Michael Kabongo is a British Congolese teacher living in London and living the dream: he’s beloved by his students, popular with his coworkers, and adored by his proud mother who emigrated from the Congo to the UK in search of a better life. But when he suffers a devastating loss, his life is thrown into a tailspin. As he struggles to find a way forward, memories of his fathers’ violent death, the weight of refugeehood, and an increasing sense of dread threaten everything he’s worked so hard to achieve. Longing to start over, Michael decides to spontaneously pack up and go to America, the mythical “land of the free,” where he imagines everything will be better and easier. On this transformative journey, Michael travels everywhere from New York City to San Francisco, partying with new friends, sparking fleeting romances, and splurging on big adventures, with the intention of living the life of his dreams until the money in his bank account runs out. “Narrated with haunting lyricism, The Selfless Act of Breathing is an intimate journey through the darkest of human impulses to the gleaming flickers of love and radical hope” (Susan Abulhawa, author of Against the Loveless World).

A “touching, furious, sharp, and very funny” novel of an immigrant teenage girl finding her own identity in France (Booklist). The Paradise projects are only a few metro stops from Paris, but it feels like a different world. Doria’s father, aka the Beard, has headed back to their hometown in Morocco, leaving her and her mom to cope with their mektoub, their destiny, alone. They have a little help—from a social worker sent by the city, a psychiatrist sent by the school, and a thug friend who recites Rimbaud. It seems like fate has dealt them an impossible hand, but Doria might still make a new life—“with bravado, humor, and a healthy dose of rage” (St. Petersburg Times). “[A] sassy, spunky tale . . . Doria has what it takes to storm any barricade.” —The Hartford Courant “[Doria is] as likable as Holden Caulfield or Prep’s Lee Fiora. Readers will cheer. Highly recommended.” —Library Journal, starred review “A promising addition to the world’s literary voices.” —The Miami Herald “Moving and irreverent, sad and funny, full of rage and intelligence. Her voice is fresh, and her book a delight.” —Laila Lalami, bestselling author of The Moor’s Account