Raising Emotionally Healthy Boys

Raising emotionally healthy children is not just about what we need to do, but what we need to avoid doing. We all know that repressing our feelings can be damaging, and that emotional repression is an especially prevalent issue among males. From a very young age, boys are socialized to hide their emotions. Girls, on the other hand, are encouraged to learn a much broader range of emotional expression. The long-term repercussions of this imbalance are profound. Many of the problems we face, both as a society and as a species, are directly affected by how we raise our boys. We are all products of nature and nurture combined. The conscious and unconscious lessons we give our children often enhance and improve their human natures, but can sometimes degrade them, too. As we come to the end of thousands of years of patriarchy, we are being challenged to redefine masculinity. Our boys are lucky to be living in such a time, and luckier when they have adults in their lives who are aware of how their minds function and what they need. If we want to raise men who are strong, confident, and whole in the best sense of these words, then parents around the world urgently need a conversation about what we teach — and don’t teach — our boys.

The stunning success of Reviving Ophelia, Mary Pipher’s landmark book, showed a true and pressing need to address the emotional lives of girls. Now, finally, here is the book that answers our equally timely and critical need to understand our boys. In Raising Cain, Dan Kindlon, Ph.D., and Michael Thompson, Ph.D., two of the country’s leading child psychologists, share what they have learned in more than thirty-five years of combined experience working with boys and their families. They reveal a nation of boys who are hurting—sad, afraid, angry, and silent. Statistics point to an alarming number of young boys at high risk for suicide, alcohol and drug abuse, violence and loneliness. Kindlon and Thompson set out to answer this basic, crucial question: What do boys need that they’re not getting? They illuminate the forces that threaten our boys, teaching them to believe that “cool” equals macho strength and stoicism. Cutting through outdated theories of “mother blame,” “boy biology,” and "testosterone,” Kindlon and Thompson shed light on the destructive emotional training our boys receive—the emotional miseducation of boys. Through moving case studies and cutting-edge research, Raising Cain paints a portrait of boys systematically steered away from their emotional lives by adults and the peer “culture of cruelty”—boys who receive little encouragement to develop qualities such as compassion, sensitivity, and warmth. The good news is that this doesn't have to happen. There is much we can do to prevent it. Kindlon and Thompson make a compelling case that emotional literacy is the most valuable gift we can offer our sons, urging parents to recognize the price boys pay when we hold them to an impossible standard of manhood. They identify the social and emotional challenges that boys encounter in school and show how parents can help boys cultivate emotional awareness and empathy—giving them the vital connections and support they need to navigate the social pressures of youth. Powerfully written and deeply felt, Raising Cain will forever change the way we see our sons and will transform the way we help them to become happy and fulfilled young men.

A professor of psychology details a five-step process called "motion coaching" that allows parents to raise a child better able to cope with his or her emotions. 35,000 first printing.

"A guide to the stages and issues in boys' development from birth to manhood"--Provided by publisher.

This groundbreaking parenting guide offers a practical five-step process for teaching children to understand and regulate their emotions. Every parent knows the importance of equipping children with the intellectual skills they need to succeed in school and life. But children also need to master their emotions. Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child is a guide to teaching children of all ages to understand and regulate their emotional world. As acclaimed psychologist John Gottman shows, emotionally intelligent children will enjoy increased self-confidence, greater physical health, better performance in school, and healthier social relationships. Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child will equip parents with a five-step “emotion coaching” process that teaches how to: -Be aware of a child’s emotions -Recognize emotional expression as an opportunity for intimacy and teaching -Listen empathetically and validate a child’s feelings -Label emotions in words a child can understand -Help a child come up with an appropriate way to solve a problem or deal with an upsetting issue or situation

While growing up has never been easy, today's world presents kids and their parents with unprecedented challenges. The upside, posits Maureen Healy, is a widespread acknowledgment that emotional health, resilience, and equilibrium can be learned and strengthened. Healy is an expert on teaching skills that address the high sensitivity, big emotions, and hyper energy she herself experienced growing up. Three simple steps are key — Stop, Calm, and Make Smarter Choices. While not always easy, these steps are powerful, and Healy shows readers exactly how to implement them. Children move from acting out or shutting down, experiencing frequent physical symptoms such as head- and stomachaches, or hurting themselves or others, to recognizing they are being triggered, feeling their emotions, and using mindfulness strategies to respond from a calmer place.

At a time when many boys are in crisis, a much-needed roadmap for helping boys grow into strong and compassionate men Over the past two decades there has been an explosion of new studies that have expanded our knowledge of how boys think and feel. In How to Raise a Boy, psychologist Michael Reichert draws on his decades of research to challenge age-old conventions about how boys become men. Reichert explains how the paradigms about boys needing to be stoic and "man like" can actually cause them to shut down, leading to anger, isolation, and disrespectful or even destructive behaviors. The key to changing the culture lies in how parents, educators, and mentors help boys develop socially and emotionally. Reichert offers readers step-by-step guidance in doing just this by: • Listening and observing, without judgment, so that boys know they're being heard. • Helping them develop strong connections with teachers, coaches, and other role models • Encouraging them to talk about their feelings about the opposite sex and stressing the importance of respecting women • Letting them know that they don't have to "be a man" or "suck it up," when they are experiencing physical or emotional pain. Featuring the latest insights from psychology and neuroscience, How to Raise a Boy will help those who care for young boys and teenagers build a boyhood that will enable them to grow into confident, accomplished and kind men.

Research tells us that globally, on average, one man dies by suicide every minute of every day. This staggering statistic indicates that many men suffer from hopelessness and despair. Parents may detect warning signs of hopelessness in their sons who regularly exhibit behaviors such as meltdowns, outbursts, and terse one-word answers. How can we help raise our sons to handle difficult emotions and process complex ideas of masculinity? Drawing from 25 years of counseling boys and working with parents, David Thomas explains what's behind these and other common struggles such as anger issues, anxiety, and depression. In all, parents will be equipped to raise emotionally strong and healthy boys who will grow up to be rooted in practices of well-being that will serve them their whole lives.