Raising Feminist Boys

In a world steeped in gender inequality and sexual violence, it's become more and more clear that we can't just teach girls to protect themselves. We must also teach boys not to do harm. Written by a clinical psychologist with expertise in modern families, Raising Feminist Boys is a parent's guide to having developmentally appropriate conversations with boys about sexual responsibility, consent, gender, empathy, and identity.

"This book is a true love letter, not only to Jha's own son but also to all of our sons and to the parents--especially mothers--who raise them.” —Ijeoma Oluo, author of So You Want to Talk About Race and Mediocre Beautifully written and deeply personal, this book follows the struggles and triumphs of one single, immigrant mother of color to raise an American feminist son. From teaching consent to counteracting problematic messages from the media, well-meaning family, and the culture at large, the author offers an empowering, imperfect feminism, brimming with honest insight and actionable advice. Informed by Jha's work as a professor of journalism specializing in social justice movements and social media, as well as by conversations with psychologists, experts, other parents and boys--and through powerful stories from her own life--How to Raise a Feminist Son shows us all how to be better feminists and better teachers of the next generation of men in this electrifying tour de force. Includes chapter takeaways, and an annotated bibliography of reading and watching recommendations for adults and children. "A beautiful hybrid of memoir, manifesto, instruction manual, and rumination on the power of story and possibilities of family." —Rebecca Solnit, author of The Mother of All Questions

"If you are the parent of a boy . . . this is the book you need . . . insightful, enlightened, practical." —Peggy Orenstein, New York Times bestselling author of Boys & Sex From the dad who created the viral tweet supporting his son wearing nail polish, this essential parenting guide shares 36 parenting tips for battling gender norms, bringing down "man up" culture, and helping sons realize their potential. Our boys are in a crisis. Toxic masculinity and tough guy-ism are on display daily from our leaders, and we see anger, dysfunction, violence, and depression in young men who are suffocated by harmful social codes. Our young sons are told to stop throwing like a girl. They hear phrases like “man up” when they cry. They are told “boys will be boys” when they behave badly. The “Girl Power” movement has encouraged women to be whoever and do whatever they want, but that sentiment is not often extended to boys. Just watch the bullying when boys try ballet, paint their fingernails, or play with a doll. But we can treat this problem—and the power lies in the hands of parents. It's not only possible to raise boys who aren't emotionally stifled and shoved into stereotypical gender boxes; it's vital if we want a generation of men who can express their emotions, respect women, and help nurse society back to a halfway healthy place. We can reframe manhood. From Aaron Gouveia, who gained viral fame after tweeting his support for his son’s painted fingernails (and who knows toxic masculinity very well), learn practical and actionable tips such as: Don’t accept different standards for moms and dads Teach boys that “girl” is not an insult and retire phrases like “boys will be boys” Show boys that expressing their emotions and being physical is a good thing Let boys pursue nontraditional interests and hobbies Talk to boys about consent and privilege Model healthy and respectful relationships for boys to emulate Penned with equal parts humor, biting snark, and lived advice, Raising Boys to Be Good Men is the essential parenting guide for raising sons to realize their potential outside the box. ​

A guide that helps parents focus on their children's unique strengths and inclinations rather than on gendered stereotypes to more effectively bring out the best in their individual children, for parents of infants to middle schoolers. Reliance on Gendered Stereotypes Negatively Impacts Kids Studies on gender and child development show that, on average, parents talk less to baby boys and are less likely to use numbers when speaking to little girls. Without meaning to, we constantly color-code children, segregating them by gender based on their presumed interests. Our social dependence on these norms has far-reaching effects, such as leading girls to dislike math or increasing aggression in boys. In this practical guide, developmental psychologist (and mother of two) Christia Spears Brown uses science-based research to show how over-dependence on gender can limit kids, making it harder for them to develop into unique individuals. With a humorous, fresh, and accessible perspective, Parenting Beyond Pink & Blueaddresses all the issues that contemporary parents should consider—from gender-segregated birthday parties and schools to sports, sexualization, and emotional intelligence. This guide empowers parents to help kids break out of pink and blue boxes to become their authentic selves.

Why do men do so little at home? Why do women do so much? Why don't our egalitarian values match our lived experiences? Journalist-turned-psychologist Darcy Lockman offers a clear-eyed look at the most pernicious problem facing modern parents—how progressive relationships become traditional ones when children are introduced into the household. In an era of seemingly unprecedented feminist activism, enlightenment, and change, data shows that one area of gender inequality stubbornly persists: the disproportionate amount of parental work that falls to women, no matter their background, class, or professional status. All the Rage investigates the cause of this pervasive inequity to answer why, in households where both parents work full-time and agree that tasks should be equally shared, mothers’ household management, mental labor, and childcare contributions still outweigh fathers’. How, in a culture that pays lip service to women’s equality and lauds the benefits of father involvement—benefits that extend far beyond the well-being of the kids themselves—can a commitment to fairness in marriage melt away upon the arrival of children? Counting on male partners who will share the burden, women today have been left with what political scientists call unfulfilled, rising expectations. Historically these unmet expectations lie at the heart of revolutions, insurgencies, and civil unrest. If so many couples are living this way, and so many women are angered or just exhausted by it, why do we remain so stuck? Where is our revolution, our insurgency, our civil unrest? Darcy Lockman drills deep to find answers, exploring how the feminist promise of true domestic partnership almost never, in fact, comes to pass. Starting with her own marriage as a ground zero case study, she moves outward, chronicling the experiences of a diverse cross-section of women raising children with men; visiting new mothers’ groups and pioneering co-parenting specialists; and interviewing experts across academic fields, from gender studies professors and anthropologists to neuroscientists and primatologists. Lockman identifies three tenets that have upheld the cultural gender division of labor and peels back the ways in which both men and women unintentionally perpetuate old norms. If we can all agree that equal pay for equal work should be a given, can the same apply to unpaid work? Can justice finally come home?

Make every moment with your child count. Tap into the psychology behind your child's behavior at every stage of development, and respond with confidence. Find out what your child really means when he says "Look what I did", "But I'm not tired," or "You're embarrassing me," and discover what's really going on when he can't express himself at all. Using more than 100 everyday scenarios, the book leads you through each one step by step, explaining not only your child's behavior and the psychology behind it but also your own feelings as a parent. It then gives instant recommendations for what you could say and do in response to best resolve the situation. Covering all your child's developmental milestones from ages 2 to 7 years, What's My Child Thinking? covers important issues, such as temper tantrums, friendships (real and imaginary), sibling rivalry, aggressive behavior, and peer pressure. There's also a bank of practical "survival guides" for critical times, such as traveling in the car, eating out, and going online safely. Rooted in evidence-based clinical psychology and championing positive parenting, What's My Child Thinking? will help you tune in to your child's innermost thoughts and be the parent you want to be.

At a time when many boys are in crisis, a much-needed roadmap for helping boys grow into strong and compassionate men Over the past two decades there has been an explosion of new studies that have expanded our knowledge of how boys think and feel. In How to Raise a Boy, psychologist Michael Reichert draws on his decades of research to challenge age-old conventions about how boys become men. Reichert explains how the paradigms about boys needing to be stoic and "man like" can actually cause them to shut down, leading to anger, isolation, and disrespectful or even destructive behaviors. The key to changing the culture lies in how parents, educators, and mentors help boys develop socially and emotionally. Reichert offers readers step-by-step guidance in doing just this by: • Listening and observing, without judgment, so that boys know they're being heard. • Helping them develop strong connections with teachers, coaches, and other role models • Encouraging them to talk about their feelings about the opposite sex and stressing the importance of respecting women • Letting them know that they don't have to "be a man" or "suck it up," when they are experiencing physical or emotional pain. Featuring the latest insights from psychology and neuroscience, How to Raise a Boy will help those who care for young boys and teenagers build a boyhood that will enable them to grow into confident, accomplished and kind men.

"A guide to the stages and issues in boys' development from birth to manhood"--Provided by publisher.