Renegotiate Your Marriage

When you got married, you and your spouse made a contract. Oh, not the one you signed in church or at the registry office. It was a contract no one but the two of you knew about. One that sets the terms of your relationship. But that contract can and does change. It changes when: you or your spouse lose your job; your first child is born; the kids leave home; your spouse cheats on you. Big changes in your life mean big changes in your marriage as well. And in this guide to a happy, healthy marriage you'll learn how to renegotiate your marriage during the ups and downs of life so that it can survive. Most of all, you'll learn the secrets to renegotiating your marriage contract so both of you remain committed to a strong, healthy, and happy wedlock.

Midlife is one of the most trying times in a marriage. Pressures come from within -- as anxiety, boredom, and restlessness tempt us to seek fulfillment in affairs or radical lifestyle changes. And pressure comes from outside, too, as growing children, aging parents, health concerns, and financial strains make it harder than ever to focus on each other. In this guide, couples who want to stay the course will find compelling, commonsense advice on how to: -- Get what they really want from each other -- Make their relationship a priority -- Recognize the risks of midlife marriage -- Rekindle -- and even improve -- their sexual relationship -- Triumph over the tough challenges that drive other couples to divorce -- Learn to really like each other again

"A fresh look at infidelity, broadening the focus from the havoc it wreaks within a committed relationship to consider also why people do it, what it means to them, and why breaking up is the expected response to duplicity — but not necessarily the wisest one.” — LA Review of Books From iconic couples’ therapist and bestselling author of Mating in Captivity comes a provocative and controversial look at infidelity with practical, honest, and empathetic advice for how to move beyond it. An affair: it can rob a couple of their relationship, their happiness, their very identity. And yet, this extremely common human experience is so poorly understood. What are we to make of this time-honored taboo—universally forbidden yet universally practiced? Why do people cheat—even those in happy marriages? Why does an affair hurt so much? When we say infidelity, what exactly do we mean? Do our romantic expectations of marriage set us up for betrayal? Is there such a thing as an affair-proof marriage? Is it possible to love more than one person at once? Can an affair ever help a marriage? Perel weaves real-life case stories with incisive psychological and cultural analysis in this fast-paced and compelling book. For the past ten years, Perel has traveled the globe and worked with hundreds of couples who have grappled with infidelity. Betrayal hurts, she writes, but it can be healed. An affair can even be the doorway to a new marriage—with the same person. With the right approach, couples can grow and learn from these tumultuous experiences, together or apart. Affairs, she argues, have a lot to teach us about modern relationships—what we expect, what we think we want, and what we feel entitled to. They offer a unique window into our personal and cultural attitudes about love, lust, and commitment. Through examining illicit love from multiple angles, Perel invites readers into an honest, enlightened, and entertaining exploration of modern marriage in its many variations. Fiercely intelligent, The State of Affairs provides a daring framework for understanding the intricacies of love and desire. As Perel observes, “Love is messy; infidelity more so. But it is also a window, like no other, into the crevices of the human heart.”

An excellent book which has helped thousands of couples resolve their marital difficulties.

It is often said that marriage in Islamic law is a civil contract, not a sacrament. If this is so, this means that the marriage contract is largely governed by the same rules as other contracts, such as sale or hire. But at the same time marriage is a profound concern of the Islamic scriptures of Qur’an and Sunna, and thus at the very core of the law and morality of Islam and of the individual, familial, and social life of Muslims. This volume collects papers from many disciplines examining the Muslim marriage contract. Articles cover doctrines as to marriage contracts (e.g., may a wife stipulate monogamy?); historical instances (e.g., legal advice from thirteenth-century Spain); comparisons with Jewish and canon law; contemporary legal and social practice; and projects of activists for women worldwide. Demonstrating a new and powerful focus for comparative and historical inquiries into Islamic law and social practices, this book marks a fresh point of departure for the study of Muslim women.

Even the strongest of marriages may face tough challenges during the course of a lifetime. Couples who maneuver through the child-rearing years successfully may be surprised to discover that, down the road, a financial setback or a major illness can rock the foundations of their union. In "Steering Your Marriage," author Dr. Suzanne Burger offers couples a toolkit to navigate life's challenges while remaining in a committed and vibrant relationship. Through anecdotes and case histories, Dr. Burger provides a guide for those seeking insight and wisdom in their journey together. She explores potential issues-such as finances, the death of a child, career changes, aging parents, chronic illness-that couples often encounter and uses examples and checklists to illustrate how to find new understanding in one another. "Steering Your Marriage" presents the latest research on what helps couples shift course as they adapt to a variety of challenges, and it offers detailed examples of couples who have successfully navigated through hardships and around unforeseen detours in their lives. This guide provides couples with the skills necessary to move through time together.

Long recognized as the authoritative guide for clinicians working with divorcing families, this book presents crucial concepts, strategies, and intervention techniques. Robert E. Emery describes how to help parents navigate the emotional and legal hurdles of this painful family transition while protecting their children's well-being. The book is grounded in cutting-edge research on family relationships, parenting, and children's adjustment, including Emery's groundbreaking longitudinal study of the impact of divorce mediation versus litigation. It provides a detailed treatment manual for mediating custody and other disputes, developing collaborative parenting plans, and fostering positive postdivorce family relationships. New to This Edition *Reflects the latest psychological research, as well as divorce and custody law. *Chapters on understanding and addressing divorcing partners' anger and grief. *Treatment manual chapters have been extensively revised. *Incorporates the author's 12-year follow-up study.

In Love, Honor and Negotiate: Making your Marriage Work, family therapist Betty Carter offers a cutting-edge, common-sense approach to helping marriages survive, grow, and flourish: renegotiating the marriage contract.