Surviving Childlessness

Childlessness is often viewed as a problem to be fixed. Many childless people are plagued with advice about relaxing, praying more and 'just' adopting. In church congregations, where children and families usually form the majority, childless people frequently feel isolated and excluded. The key to surviving childlessness lies not in simply 'fixing it' but in solidarity, healthy grieving and embracing one's vulnerabilities. In Surviving Childlessness I tell thirteen people's unique stories of childlessness and share my own story of being childless-by-forced-choice. With compassion, frankness and humour, we explore how healing can be found in re-discovering and re-inventing ourselves and in embracing the mysteries of God, even-or especially-in suffering.

“What if I never get to be a mother?” When this doubt first takes hold, it can knock you completely off your feet. You feel cheated, frustrated, and no longer sure of your place in society, your family, or your circle of friends. Now…imagine you could spend time with someone who really understands how you feel, who lets you express all the things that once seemed whiny, self-indulgent, or just plain crazy, and who confides that she once felt that way too. Life Without Baby founder, Lisa Manterfield, once stood where you are and not only survived, but thrived. Now she shares what she learned from her own experiences and from the women of the community she created. She’ll help you: – Know when it’s time to cut your losses and let go of your dream – Give yourself permission to grieve the loss that few others can truly understand – Learn some emotional aikido moves to handle social challenges, such as baby showers, Mother’s Day, and the dreaded “Do you have kids?” question – Rediscover your passion and find joy again, without enduring a complete life makeover – Get pragmatic about aging without children and building a new kind of family Based on her small-group workshops and popular ebook series, this book offers a combination of hard-won lessons, gentle queries, and real-world suggestions. Manterfield is a comforting and supportive companion who will guide you gently down your own path to making peace with being childfree-not-by-choice and thriving in a new happily ever after.

First you marry a man who does not want children. He cheats and you divorce him. Then you marry the love of your life and find out he does not want to have children with you either. The three he has are more than enough. Although you always wanted to be a mother, you decide he is worth the sacrifice, expecting to have a long happy life together. But that's not what happens. This is the story of how a woman becomes childless by marriage and how it affects every aspect of her life. This is the book of my heart, the one I had to write. Ever since I realized I was not going to have children, I have felt recurring grief and an emptiness in my heart. I am different from most women, but I have found that I am not alone. There are many of us childless women, and I think it's important to share our stories about what it's like when you don't have children in a world where most girls grow up to become mothers. I hope this book offers comfort to those who are childless and understanding to those who are not. If it makes you smile here and there, even better.

‘The book to recommend to patients when they face coming to terms with unavoidable childlessness.' – British Medical Journal In Living the Life Unexpected, Jody Day addresses the experience of involuntary childlessness and provides a powerful, practical guide to help those negotiating a future without children come to terms with their grief; a grief that is only just beginning to be recognized by society. This friendly, practical, humorous and honest guide from one of the world’s most respected names in childless support offers compassion and understanding and shows how it’s possible to move towards a creative, happy, meaningful and fulfilling future – even if it’s not the one you had planned. Millions of people are now living a life without children, almost double that of a generation ago and the numbers are rising still. Although some are childfree by choice, many others are childless due to infertility or circumstance and are struggling to come to terms with their uncertain future. Although most people think that those without children either 'couldn't' or 'didn't want’ to be parents, the truth is much more complex. Jody Day was forty-four when she realized that her quest to be a mother was at an end. She presumed that she was through the toughest part, but over the next couple of years she was hit by waves of grief, despair and isolation. Eventually she found her way and in 2011 created Gateway Women, the global friendship and support network for childless women which has now helped almost two million people worldwide. This edition, previously titled Rocking the Life Unexpected, has been extensively revised and updated, with significant additional content and case studies from forty involuntarily childless people (mostly women) from around the world.

In How to Be Childless: A History and Philosophy of Life Without Children, Rachel Chrastil explores the long and fascinating history of childlessness, putting this often-overlooked legacy in conversation with the issues that childless women and men face in the twenty-first century. Eschewing two dominant narratives, that the childless are either barren and alone, or that they are carefree and selfish, How to Be Childless instead argues that the lives of childless individuals from the past can help all of us expand our range of possibilities for the good life. In uncovering the voices and experiences of childless women from the past five hundred years, Chrastil demonstrates that the pathways to childlessness, so often simplified as "choice" and "circumstance," are far more complex and interweaving. Balanced, deeply researched, and richly realized, How to be Childless will empower readers, parents and childless alike, to navigate their lives with purpose.

The debut novel about the life-changing choices we make about careers, love, friendship, and motherhood from bestselling UK author Emma Gannon. Olive is many things. Independent. Driven. Loyal. And a little bit adrift. She’s okay with still figuring it all out, navigating her world without a compass. But life comes with expectations and big choices to be made. So when her best friends’ lives branch away towards marriage and motherhood, leaving the path they’ve always followed together, she starts to question her choices—because life according to Olive looks a little bit different. Moving, memorable, and a mirror for anyone at a crossroads, OLIVE has a little bit of all of us. Told with humor and great warmth, this is a modern tale about the obstacle course of adulthood and the challenges of having—and deciding not to have—children.

A cloth bag containing ten copies of the title.

While interest in the drivers, consequences, nature and manifestations of voluntary and involuntary childlessness increases, knowledge progress is hampered by poor linkages across disjointed research fields. The book brings together theoretical insights and empirical investigations into the phenomenon, united within a feminist conceptual framework.