They Call Me Mr Ummmm

A bit irreverent yet, kind and truthful, this book is for substitutes, teachers, and administrators. It describes the work-life of an experienced substitute teacher through the lenses of ""best practices."" It begins with the need for education: Axiom (1) ""Teaching is a prerequisite for human evolution"" to Axiom (11) ""Do not take anything personally"", even when the students say you are ""the best sub they ever had."" For grades K-12, this book helps with classroom management techniques to keeping track of multiple assignments. All you need is a tolerance for ambiguity (everyday is different), a healthy lunch, and perhaps ear plugs for rainy day recesses. Author: Bill Buxton (MA, MBA, TESOL) has been a ""mostly friendly"" substitute for about five years for grades four through twelve in various socioeconomic districts. He believes the primary goal of a substitute teacher is to support the professional teacher by following the sub plans, with some discretion, of course.

Jethro Sirius is Star Wars meets Harry Potter meets The Rolling Stones all rolled into one big, giant, intergalactic space burrito! DARCY G. O F THE DARCY G. SHOW! When their parents, who happen to be in one of the biggest rock bands in the known universe, go missing while on an inter-galactic tour, four young aliens decide to pick up where their parents left off and form their own band, The Jethro Sirius Experiment. Left to their own devices including a Space Bus equipped with its own water park and aided by the ships computer, Libby, the band sets out on an epic adventure of universal proportions. Having decided to masquerade as their parents band and continue on with the tour while at the same time searching for their missing parents, the young alien rockers soon find out that the Universe is both a wonderful and dangerous place full of giant Space Slugs, plant people, bounty hunters, Monsturds, slave traders, space goblins and an evil maniacal ego obsessed villain that looks like a furry pink bunny rabbit. Jethro Sirius is a wildly amusing sci-fi adventure story that will engage your inner rockstar and leave you wishing you had a guitar in your hands.

The Dragon Lantern is the second action-packed, steampunk adventure in the League of Seven series by the acclaimed author of Samurai Shortstop, Alan Gratz. Archie Dent is convinced that he and his friends Hachi and Fergus are the first three members of a new League of Seven: a group of heroes who come together to fight the Mangleborn whenever the monsters arise to destroy humanity. His belief is put to the test when they are forced to undertake separate missions. Archie and his faithful Tik-Tok servant Mr. Rivets pursue a shapeshifting girl who has stolen the Dragon Lantern, an ancient artifact with mysterious powers. And Hachi and Fergus travel to New Orleans to find Madame Blavatsky, the only person who knows the circumstances surrounding the death of Hachi's father. In the course of their adventures the three heroes meet potential candidates to join their League. At the same time, they learn deep-rooted secrets that could destroy the League forever.... At the Publisher's request, this title is being sold without Digital Rights Management Software (DRM) applied.

It isn’t easy when you find yourself lost and alone in a strange place. It’s even trickier when that place is a different world, and you have no idea how you got there. Drome’s top priority isn’t to figure that out. It’s to avoid getting himself killed. But his talent for making enemies as he flees the villainous courtiers who took him hostage, really isn’t helping. He’s in an unfamiliar city, in a bizarre hollow world, and he only has one friend. Well, that’s if he can call a snarky living skeleton with a penchant for stealing royal jewels a friend. What with every palace guard and a crazed assassin after the pair, the odds are stacked against them. Running out of time, luck, and options, it’s touch-and-go whether they’ll make it to Drome’s village and warn them of the horror coming their way. And then there’s the wizard. If only Drome hadn’t angered him too… So, is Drome in trouble? Yup. He’s screwed. If you like Terry Pratchett, Douglas Adams, and Joe Abercrombie, you won't be able to put down the addictive Hollow series.

Have you ever worked at a job you hate? Some place you’ve spent years toiling away only to realize you’re stuck with no place to go? Then you can relate to some of the things in this book. With over twenty years’ experience in the public school system, a janitor can tell you some stories. Dirty situations, limitless bosses, insane coworkers, all told through the eyes of a mop jockey. With colorful characters leading the way, The Day I Clean My Last Toilet will make you laugh, cry, and ponder your current work situation.

Satchel, the ever-hapless Shar-pei-Lab mix in the "Get Fuzzy" gang, is the star of this book, inspired by his hero, Wonder Mutt. Rounding out this not-so-warm-and-fuzzy cast is Rob Wilco, a single, mild-mannered ad exec, and Bucky Katt, a high strung, bucktoothed Siamese.