To Forgive Is Human

Grounding their analysis in groundbreaking research, Michael E. McCullough, Steven Sandage and Everett L. Worthington Jr. show how you can experience authentic forgiveness in ways that bring restoration and healing.

In our culture the belief that "To err is human, to forgive divine," is so prevalent that few of us question its wisdom. But do we ever completely forgive those who have betrayed us? Aren't some actions unforgivable? Can we achieve closure and healing without forgiving? Drawing on more than two decades of work as a practicing psychotherapist, more than fifty indepth interviews, and sterling research into the concept of forgiveness in our society, Dr. Jeanne Safer challenges popular opinion with her own searching answers to these and other questions. The result is a penetrating look at what is often a lonely, and perhaps unnecessary, struggle to forgive those who have hurt us the most and an illuminating examination of how to determine whether forgiveness is, indeed, the best path to take--and why, often, it is not.

Forgiving those closest to us who have hurt us is one of the most difficult things Christians are called to do. For pastoral counselors the forgiveness issue creates a particularly serious dilemma, because it places counselors in the position of telling clients to do something their emotions vehemently fight against. Is Human Forgiveness Possible? offers an effective way out of this quandary by giving the forgiveness issue an entirely new focus. John Patton begins by scrapping our past understanding of forgiveness. Forgiveness is not something we do, he asserts; it's something we discover. To truly forgive someone, we must discover that I am more like those who have hurt me than different from them. I am able to forgive when I discover that I am in no position to forgive. Patton presents case studies from his pastoral counseling practice that illustrate the difficulty of forgiving and actively demonstrate his new solution to the forgiveness problem. John Patton is executive director of the Georgia Association for Pastoral Care in Atlanta. He is the author of Pastoral Counseling: A Ministry of the Church (Abingdon Press).

Rebecca Rist explores the nature and scope of the relationship of the medieval papacy to the Jews of western Europe in the context of the substantial and on-going social, political, and economic changes of the 11th, 12th and 13th centuries.

Forgiveness is a central tenet of the Christian faith and yet it is so difficult to embrace and put into practise. With sensitivity and grace, Dr Sue Atkinson explores what it means. The example of Christians forgiving others is often heralded as one of the great signs of Christian love and yet the call to forgive can have a darker side, particularly for victims of injustice and trauma as it can add to their despair and guilt if they do not 'feel' love or the ability to forgive. Well-meaning Christians can make their situation worse with insensitivity and bluntness. In this timely and empathetic book, full of anecdote, story and illustration, Dr Sue Atkinson, tackles what the call to forgive really means. What do we really do when we forgive? Exploring Jesus teaching about forgiveness and justice, she explodes myths and outlines practical ways in which we can let go of resentments. Highly accessible and sensitive this important book will be a means of grace and comfort for those embracing the challenges of forgiveness.

Archbishop Desmond Tutu, Nobel Peace Prize winner, Chair of The Elders, and Chair of South Africa’s Truth and Reconciliation Commission, along with his daughter, the Reverend Mpho Tutu, offer a manual on the art of forgiveness—helping us to realize that we are all capable of healing and transformation. Tutu's role as the Chair of the Truth and Reconciliation Commission taught him much about forgiveness. If you asked anyone what they thought was going to happen to South Africa after apartheid, almost universally it was predicted that the country would be devastated by a comprehensive bloodbath. Yet, instead of revenge and retribution, this new nation chose to tread the difficult path of confession, forgiveness, and reconciliation. Each of us has a deep need to forgive and to be forgiven. After much reflection on the process of forgiveness, Tutu has seen that there are four important steps to healing: Admitting the wrong and acknowledging the harm; Telling one's story and witnessing the anguish; Asking for forgiveness and granting forgiveness; and renewing or releasing the relationship. Forgiveness is hard work. Sometimes it even feels like an impossible task. But it is only through walking this fourfold path that Tutu says we can free ourselves of the endless and unyielding cycle of pain and retribution. The Book of Forgiving is both a touchstone and a tool, offering Tutu's wise advice and showing the way to experience forgiveness. Ultimately, forgiving is the only means we have to heal ourselves and our aching world.

The process of forgiveness is often complicated, but it can be rewarding when completed. Forgiveness may not be easy for many, but it is essential for spiritual maturity. To do so, we must understand what forgiveness means or entails—as well as what it does not. At one point or another, all human beings, especially Christians, must forgive and be forgiven. This study presents a journey through the scriptures to discover why it is so hard to forgive and what can be done to accomplish it from a biblical perspective. Building on personal insight and strategies, author Robert E. Gaines Sr., PhD, first focuses on the misconceptions about forgiveness and explores its meaning. He then considers the Christian motivation to forgive and reveals the freedom found in forgiveness. Then the discussion moves to the process of forgiveness and the benefits of completing the process of forgiving. Encouraging and inspiring, this biblical study examines all aspects of forgiveness from a biblical perspective and proposes ways for Christians to embrace the freedom that it brings.