Uncle John S Bathroom Reader Colossal Collection Of Quotable Quotes

You’ll never be at a loss for words again with this inspired collection of quotes, from bona fide wits to bona fide dimwits. Bob Hope once said, "I grew up with six brothers. That’s how I learned to dance--waiting for the bathroom." No doubt, lots of people will be learning to tango and foxtrot while they wait for the rabid readers of Uncle John’s Colossal Collection of Quotable Quotes to emerge from the privy. The Bathroom Readers’ Institute searched high and low for the wittiest, wisest and stupidest things ever said, and collected these remarks in one remarkable volume. With more than 4,000 quotations from 1,600 speakers and writers--from bona fide wits like Oscar Wilde and David Letterman, to bona fide dimwits like Britney Spears (who infamously quipped, "I go to lots of overseas places, like Canada.")--there’s no other book of quotations quite like this one.

An all-new follow up quotation book to 2004’s Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader Colossal Collection of Quotable Quotes, complete with indexes by name and by subject for easy reference. Here it is: the quintessential collection of notable quotes for all occasions. Grouped together in weird categories as only Uncle John could do, you’ll find quotes about farts, firsts, dogs, Canada, male chauvinist pigs, colors, TV, aliens, and more! And not just quotes, either--there are great facts, fun quizzes, and a few longer articles about how quotations shape our world. As if that weren’t enough, there are a ton of eye-opening new entries for Uncle John’s Quotationary. (Love: “Being stupid together.” --Paul Valery) And to make it easier than ever to find the exact quote you’re looking for, there is a by-subject index as well a by-name index. Here are but a few of the thousands of great quotations awaiting you: * “I don’t really care what I’m famous for.” --Jessica Simpson * “Life is a tragedy when seen in close-up, but a comedy in long-shot.” --Charlie Chaplin * “The way that I feel about music is there is no right and wrong. Only true and false.” --Fiona Apple * “One of the advantages of being disorderly is that one is constantly making exciting discoveries.” --A. A. Milne * “Bears are crazy. They’ll bite your head if you’re wearing a steak on it.” --Space Ghost * “I don’t mind not being president. I just mind that someone else is.” --Ted Kennedy * “If little else, the brain is an educational toy.” --Tom Robbins

Over 70% of North Americans are (water) closet readers. The Uncle John's Bathroom Readers series is still the best selling book of its kind anywhere in the world. Millions of people have discovered it over the past 25 years, making it one of the publishing industry's longest-running humor series. It's our 16th year running (so to speak) I mean, we're still going (uhh) strong. A light-hearted, easy-to-read collection of facts, quotes, history, science, word-origins, pop culture, gossip, humor . . . and more! Organized by length-"Short" (a quick read), "Medium" (1-3 pages), "Long" (for those visits when something a little more involved is required), and to satisfy every demand, our popular "Extended Sitting Section" (for a leg-numbing experience.) Running feet on every page provide a "book within a book" of weird facts. Partial Table of Contents included.

The 35th annual edition of Uncle John’s compendium features entertaining, informative, and amusing real-life stories from around the world. This 35th anniversary edition of Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader is bursting with everything you could possibly want to read in the throne room, including short articles for a quick trip and lengthier page-turners for an extended visit. Uncle John and his team at the Bathroom Readers’ Institute have once again gathered the most entertaining and amusing stories from the realms of pop culture, history, science, and sports (not to mention accounts of even more dumb crooks!) for your reading pleasure. In addition, there are plenty of laugh-out-loud lists, amusing quotes, and odd factoids that will delight the most ardent of trivia fans.

The number 13 is lucky for the thousands of bathroom readers eagerly awaiting Uncle John's latest lighthearted collection of facts, quotes, history, science, word origins, pop culture, gossip, and "uncanny" humor. As always, the entries are organized by length to accommodate short, medium, and long visits, and the book features the popular "Extended Sitting Section" for a leg-numbing experience. Footers running on every page comprise a book-within-a-book of weird facts. This edition includes: -- fashion's fads and flops -- the origin of the Thighmaster -- how to read palms -- celebrity lawsuits -- origins of songs and much more

Uncle John's All-Purpose Extra Strength Bathroom Reader, is filled to the rim with 504 all-new pages of some of the most interesting bathroom reading we've ever found. "All-Purpose means that you can read your Bathroom Reader anywhere, in the obvious spot, in bed or, heck, by the pool or at work," says Uncle John. "And what gives it Extra Strength? Years of research gathered, you can guess where, by our crackpot, I mean hotshot, team." It's our 13th edition, and to celebrate our luck, we have a page devoted to triskaidekaphobia, the fear of ten plus three. You'll learn why the number thirteen got such a bad rap. We thoroughly investigate the history of Dracula, the stories behind the biggest movie bombs ever, and the origin and unintended use of the I.Q. test. Plus court transquips, word origins, jokes, brain teasers, Uncle John's Stall of Fame, and more!