What The F

It may be starred, beeped, and censored -- yet profanity is so appealing that we can't stop using it. In the funniest, clearest study to date, Benjamin Bergen explains why, and what that tells us about our language and brains. Nearly everyone swears-whether it's over a few too many drinks, in reaction to a stubbed toe, or in flagrante delicto. And yet, we sit idly by as words are banned from television and censored in books. We insist that people excise profanity from their vocabularies and we punish children for yelling the very same dirty words that we'll mutter in relief seconds after they fall asleep. Swearing, it seems, is an intimate part of us that we have decided to selectively deny. That's a damn shame. Swearing is useful. It can be funny, cathartic, or emotionally arousing. As linguist and cognitive scientist Benjamin K. Bergen shows us, it also opens a new window onto how our brains process language and why languages vary around the world and over time. In this groundbreaking yet ebullient romp through the linguistic muck, Bergen answers intriguing questions: How can patients left otherwise speechless after a stroke still shout Goddamn! when they get upset? When did a cock grow to be more than merely a rooster? Why is crap vulgar when poo is just childish? Do slurs make you treat people differently? Why is the first word that Samoan children say not mommy but eat shit? And why do we extend a middle finger to flip someone the bird? Smart as hell and funny as fuck, What the F is mandatory reading for anyone who wants to know how and why we swear.

If dinnertime has you cursing up a storm, this cookbook of 50 profane and delicious dishes will get you off your indecisive a** and into the f*@#ing kitchen! Derived from the incredibly popular (and totally addictive) website, WhatTheFuckShouldIMakeForDinner.com, this "choose your own adventure" style cookbook provides quick and easy solutions for the nightly conundrum. Every page is a new (and easy) meal, with enough pizzazz to keep you interested. Don't like the recipe? Simply choose another page for a new f*@#ing idea! Making choices is hard, so let this book do it for you with 50 solid meal ideas-and a side of salty language-for meat-eaters and vegetarians alike, such as: Scallop Ceviche Grilled Skirt Steak with Chimichurri Red Flannel Hash Vegetarian Cassoulet Never hem and haw over what to make for dinner again! What the F*@# Should I Make For Dinner? is the perfect gift for anyone who loves food, and will become your go-to guide to save you from headache, hunger, and your own wishy-washy self.

Today's most important question: What the F*@# should I drink? It's all covered here! We've all been there: you come home from a long day and just want to have a drink-but which drink? There are so many options, how do you decide? What the F*@# Should I Drink? has the answer! The follow-up to the wildly successful and deliciously offensive What the F*@# Should I Make for Dinner?, What the F*@# Should I Drink? provides over 75 recipes for everything from a Sidecar to a Moscow Mule to whatever the f*@# a Caipirinha is. They're easy to mix and even easier to drink, and soon you'll forget the original question. With a "choose your adventure" style recipe guide-don't like the recipe in front of you? Choose another!-and wonderfully offensive directions, What the F*@# Should I Drink? is f*@#ing fantastic, and it will make you feel f*@#ing fantastic too.

Answering the Existential Question of What the F*@# to Do with Your Life with Spot-On Humor (and Profanity) If you've tried and failed to find your purpose in life, you're going to need expert help. From the author of What the F*@# Should I Make For Dinner?, this laugh-out-loud career guide will set you straight. Take a brief career quiz to find your perfect match, and get the inside scoop on a wide variety of crappy careers, plus tips on breaking in, leaving you with no excuse not to embark on a fulfilling vocation as: Electrician Therapist T-Shirt Cannon Operator Dental Hygienist Mortician Lobbyist . . . And more. And don't worry: if that perfect career eludes or you fail at everything else, you can always be a realtor.

At 17, Rowland Rivron had already fulfilled his ambitions as a professional drummer gigging in London’s West End. All that changed in the 1980s when he fell in with the new and anarchic ‘alternative comedians’. Alongside Rik Mayall, Ade Edmondson, Alexei Sayle and others, he appeared in such culturally defining shows as The Comic Strip Presents, The Young Ones, The Tube and of course French & Saunders, where he appeared as the charismatic Duane, one half of the inimitable Raw Sex. But the real story is what went on behind the scenes because, possessing the constitution of an ox, he fast got reputation as a party animal and loose cannon. When he wasn’t having penalty shoot-outs with Diana Ross in her Ritz suite or upsetting countless Hollywood stars, he could be found cycling down the staircase of the Groucho Club or setting fire to himself for money. Wherever he went there was bound to be trouble, hilarity and an eye-watering bar bill. In What the F*** Did I Do Last Night? he bares his soul (and quite a lot else) in a tale of hilarious encounters, death-defying escapades and shameless unprofessionalism. You have to read it to believe it.

What the f*ck is the Dark Web, and how does it even work? Whether it's from dodgy acronym-titled crime shows to news stories designed to terrify you down to your socks we've all heard about sites like Silk Road and the ways criminals use cryptocurrency online. But did you know that among the various shady corners of the dark web you can also find portals to the BBC and Facebook? The thing is even the way the everyday internet works is a mystery to us and its darkest corners are, of course, more deeply shrouded. So, let's go on a journey from the birth of the Net through the strangest dark services - need a hitman to bump off your superfluous...er...beloved spouse? - to the surprisingly positive uses of dark technology, including dodging the watchful eye of oppressive censors. Over half of us can't remember a time before the internet - and for the rest it's increasingly difficult to imagine life without the damn thing! It's about time we understood more about it and we can start with the question: What The Fuck is The Dark Web?

Answering the Existential Question of What the F*@# to Do with Your Life with Spot-On Humor (and Profanity) If you've tried and failed to find your purpose in life, you're going to need expert help. From the author of What the F*@# Should I Make For Dinner?, this laugh-out-loud career guide will set you straight. Take a brief career quiz to find your perfect match, and get the inside scoop on a wide variety of crappy careers, plus tips on breaking in, leaving you with no excuse not to embark on a fulfilling vocation as: Electrician Therapist T-Shirt Cannon Operator Dental Hygienist Mortician Lobbyist . . . And more. And don't worry: if that perfect career eludes or you fail at everything else, you can always be a realtor.