Becoming An Ex

The experience of becoming an ex is common to most people in modern society. Unlike individuals in earlier cultures who usually spent their entire lives in one marriage, one career, one religion, one geographic locality, people living in today's world tend to move in and out of many roles in the course of a lifetime. During the past decade there has been persistent interest in these "passages" or "turning points," but very little research has dealt with what it means to leave behind a major role or incorporate it into a new identity. Helen Rose Fuchs Ebaugh's pathbreaking inquiry into the phenomenon of becoming an ex reveals the profundity of this basic aspect of establishing an identity in contemporary life. Ebaugh is herself an ex, having left the life of a Catholic nun to become a wife, mother, and professor of sociology. Drawing on interviews with 185 people, Ebaugh explores a wide range of role changes, including ex-convicts, ex-alcoholics, divorced people, mothers without custody of their children, ex-doctors, ex-cops, retirees, ex-nuns, and—perhaps most dramatically—transsexuals. As this diverse sample reveals, Ebaugh focuses on voluntary exits from significant roles. What emerges are common stages of the role exit process—from disillusionment with a particular identity, to searching for alternative roles, to turning points that trigger a final decision to exit, and finally to the creation of an identify as an ex. Becoming an Ex is a challenging and influential study that will be of great interest to sociologists, mental health counselors, members of self-help groups such as Alcoholics Anonymous and Parents Without Partners, those in corporate settings where turnover has widespread implications for the organization, and for anyone struggling through a role exit who is trying to establish a new sense of self.

"Becoming the Ex-Wife tells the story of US women's changing prospects in early twentieth-century life through the lens of its once-famous but now-forgotten subject, Ursula Parrott. Parrott was a prolific and best-selling author whose books, Hollywood deals, quartet of marriages and divorces, and numerous run-ins with the law made headlines over the course of her unconventional life. Part biography, part cultural history, Becoming the Ex-Wife is a timely story about women and careers, divorce, reproductive rights, and single motherhood told through the life of a woman who was on the front line of a culture war that is still being fought today"--

Despite broad scholarship documenting the compounding effects and self-reproducing character of incarceration, ways of conceptualising imprisonment and the post-prison experience have scarcely changed in over a century. Contemporary correctional thinking has congealed around notions of risk and management. This book aims to cast new light on men’s experience of release from prison. Drawing on research conducted in Australia, it speaks to the challenges facing people leaving prison and seeking acceptance amongst the non-imprisoned around the world. Johns reveals the complexity of the post-prison experience, which is frequently masked by constructions of risk that individualise responsibility for reoffending and reimprisonment. This book highlights the important role of community in ex-prisoner integration, in providing opportunities for participation and acceptance. Johns shows that the process of becoming an ‘ex’-prisoner is not simply one of individual choice or larger structural forces, but occurs in the spaces in between. Being and Becoming an Ex-Prisoner reveals the complex interplay between internal and external meanings and practices that causes men to feel neither locked up, nor wholly free. It will appeal to scholars and students interested in desistance, criminology, criminological or penological theory, sociology and qualitative research methods.

If you are divorced, or are contemplating divorce, you’ve probably heard the diatribe: Divorce is messy. Divorce is a tragedy. Divorce will scar your children for life. Befriending Your Ex challenges many of these destructive myths about divorce, and sets out to change the way we think about the process of divorce and its ultimate outcome. While divorce certainly can have negative effects upon children, when they occur, these effects are likely to result from a hostile and combative relationship between ex-spouses. This uplifting book reminds the reader that all divorces need not follow this unhappy script, and that ex-spouses can collaboratively co-parent and be a source of support, not only to their children, but to one another as well. Author Judy Rabinor’s ability to write as both a divorcee and a psychologist gives her a unique perspective on the subject, and in the book she artfully and thoughtfully combines research, clinical practice, and the everyday reality faced by a divorced parent. As a guide for parents, this book is filled with practical exercises, suggestions and strategies for coping with anger, grief, and loss, as well as the myriad of day to day issues involved in co-parenting after divorce. Story after story—including Judy’s own story—reminds the reader that once the emotional tsunami of divorce settles back down, exes can be connected and supportive to one another as they share a major joy: loving and raising children and grandchildren, enjoying the family they have created, and creating a new family unit to evolve in the wake of divorce.

The author presents a humorous look at her obsession with the Internet and her cellular phone, arguing that her dependence is a sign of how social media has made it difficult for her and her peers to have meaningful connections to others.

A funny, honest, and empathetic resource for the novice stepmother on maintaining sanity, solving hair-raising identity issues, regaining a sense of humor, and surviving what you did for love.... What happens when the honeymoon comes to a screeching halt and you're faced with a houseful of rambunctious children, an ever-present ex-wife, and a new husband trying to balance the chaos? This helpful guide includes advice on: • The kids: Adjusting to suspicion, resentment, and biological-parent loyalties • The ex-wife: Living calmly alongside her, whether she's a psycho or the perfect mother • The holidays: Accommodating old family traditions and developing new ones • The sex: Keeping love alive through the kids' bed-wettings and nightmares • The finances: Building safety nets and avoiding financial disasters • The urge to be evil: Accepting it, and then stopping yourself from saying something you'll regret—to him, the kids, or her • Plus an invaluable list of resources, websites, publications, and organizations specifically for the new stepmother

Severing a cherished relationship is one of the most painful experiences in life—and cutting those emotional ties to a loved one can feel almost like ending an addiction. Up till now, people recovering from other problems were able to get real help—like AA and rehab—while those struggling in the aftermath of traumatic breaks dealt with platitudes and friends insisting they should "get over it already." But now Exaholics Anonymous treats getting over an ex like kicking a chemical habit. Written by counselor and therapist Dr. Lisa Bobby, Exaholics offers meaningful support and advice to anyone trapped in the obsessive pain of a broken, or dying, attachment. She helps the brokenhearted heal, showing them, on a deep level, how to develop a conceptual framework for their experience, understand the emotional processes at work inside themselves, find the path to recovery, and free themselves of shame, injured ego, and remorse. In-depth case studies of others' journeys will illuminate the way to future happiness.

Self Help.