Blending Families Successfully

According to the National Center for Health Statistics, less than half of the people who get married in the United States remain with their first spouse, and less than 50 percent of children grow up with both biological parents. In short, we live in a society of blended families. Everyone who survives a divorce and enters a new family is vulnerable. George Glass, MD, a board-certified psychiatrist, has designed a book to help parents understand the challenges of beginning new lives with blended families, and to help their children make the necessary adjustments. He explains how to approach unavoidable dilemmas when they occur and offers invaluable lessons about the link between divorce and issues of self-esteem, depression, substance abuse, and relationship failures that often result from the breakup of a family. Gathered from his years in practice and his own personal experience as a member of a blended family, Glass provides practical solutions to everyday problems. Blending a family, Glass explains, is a process, which requires patience. It can take a long time to develop trust, acceptance, and a willingness to overlook transgressions that in the beginning can cause tension. Each chapter offers specific advice to help blended family members improve their communication skills and ease the transitions from separate households into a larger, combined community. Taken together with a steady dose of “Dos and Don’ts,” this book provides an inspiring toolkit for families in need.

Blended Family Advice is step-by-step guide to help blended and stepfamilies navigate the rough areas in their marriage and family. The book focuses on three main areas: marriage, kids, and the outside world. Learn how to communicate with your ex-spouse successfully, create a sense of unity in your newly blended family, how to treat stepparents and stepsiblings, and how to create house rules and expectations in your new blended household. Shirley Cress Dudley uses her skills as a licensed professional counselor, and as a stepmom to help blended and step families learn how to become strong and successful. Blended Family Advice contains the keys to a successful blended family along with several bonus reports: a financial planner, creating successful blended family holidays, house hunting for the blended family, and a guide for grandparents. Blended families and stepfamilies will find this book to be a comprehensive resource and one that every stepfamily and blended family will need in their home. Visit The Blended and Step Family Resource Center http://www.TheBlendedandStepFamilyResourceCenter.com and http://www.BlendedFamilyAdvice.com for more information. Shirley Cress Dudley, MA LPC [email protected]

Today more Americans are part of a second-marriage family than a first. Inevitably, these newly blended "stepfamilies" will be confronted by their own special problems and needs.This insightful problem-solving guide offers solid solutions--and includes real-life stories from families who've been through the adjustment process. Written by an award-winning author who specializes in health and family care, the book covers a wide range of issues--emotional, financial, disciplinary, and interpersonal. Naturally, there is no "one-size-fits-all" solution for second-marriage families. Each is unique, with its own composition, personalities, and problems. But with patience and understanding, this new family can work, live, and eventually love--together.Includes special sections on: * Family communication * Former spouses * Grandparents and step-grandparents * Juggling households * Commuting children * Discipline * School issues * Family customs and rituals * Religious differences * Reducing stress * Adult time * Money issues * Holiday planning * Vacations * Curfews and other rules

Rebecca Eckler’s newest book chronicles the hard truth of what it’s really like to make a blended family. Blissfully Blended Bullshit is a witty, engaging, refreshingly candid chronicle of a modern family’s journey as they blend households. We follow Eckler as her partner and his two children move in with her and her daughter. Then, thanks to a reverse vasectomy, they add a baby to the mix. Readers go along for the ride in this poignant, often hilarious tale, as everyone attempts to navigate their new roles: the children, the in-laws, the exes, the ex-in-laws, and even the dog. Lighthearted and intimate, this is an indispensable story about a family determined to make blended splendid, and the juicy truth of what it’s really like behind closed doors in what is rapidly becoming a typical family makeup. Still, if Eckler had to blend again, would she?

Based on a landmark longitudinal study, the nation's leading expert on stepfamilies reveals his breakthrough findings and offers the first detailed guide to easing the conflicts of stepfamily life and healing the scars of divorce. There are more than twenty million stepfamilies in America. For most of them, the simple, daily issues that challenge every family are even more anxiety-provoking. After conducting a comprehensive nine-year-long study funded by the National Institutes of Health, Dr. James H. Bray has written an invaluable book that explains why over half of all stepfamilies fail and reveals the strategies that help the others succeed. A stepfamily is assaulted on all sides by difficult and often divisive questions. How much control should a stepparent have over a stepchild? How much authority should a nonresidential parent exert over a child? How should a difficult former spouse be handled? How does an "ours" baby change the emotional dynamic in a stepfamily? Why is there a lack of "honeymoon effect" during the first years of stepfamily life? The purpose of Stepfamilies is to answer all the important questions of stepfamily life--to fill in the knowledge gaps that undermine so many stepfamilies today and, crucially, to learn the effect of stepfamily life on children. Based on one of the largest and longest studies of stepfamily life ever conducted, Stepfamilies interweaves the stories of real families to illustrate such study findings as how: a stepfamily has its own natural life cycle a stepfamily takes several years to develop into a family unit a stepfamily is at greatest risk during the first two years a stepfamily ultimately coalesces into one of three forms a stepfamily must solve four basic tasks in order to succeed a stepfamily can help heal the scars of divorce Filled with emotional, gripping stories, Bray's findings pinpoint the three major transitions in stepfamily life and identify the riskiest issues that can throw a family into crisis. Bray is the first to identify the several distinct forms that stepfamilies take and to explore which types of stepfamilies are more vulnerable than others and why. He also describes the natural life cycle of stepfamilies and basic tasks all stepfamilies must undertake to succeed. With a wealth of insight into the positive effects of remarriage, Bray shows how a loving, well-functioning stepfamily can lessen the trauma of divorce and restore a child's and family's sense of security. Most stepparents remarry with the highest hopes and new resolutions for a better life. Never before have their unique needs been addressed in depth. Through insightful case studies and practical advice, Stepfamilies reveals how a strong, stable stepfamily is as capable as a nuclear family of nurturing healthy development, of imbuing values, of setting limits and boundaries, and of providing a structure in which rules for living a moral and productive life are transmitted, tested, rebelled against, and ultimately affirmed. Bray's positive message and fascinating findings--many of which defy intuition--will put stepfamilies on the road to lifelong harmony.

Surprisingly, many couples about to remarry and start step-parenting do not even read a book about it (less than fifty percent do). But education about marriage and parenting does increase marital success. Blended Families: Recipes for Success, is a pivotal book from Barbara J Peters, counselor and relationship coach, that presents easy to follow recipes for a lifetime of blended marriage. Barbara has been helping couples for years with her other books such as The Gift of a Lifetime, Building a Marriage That Lasts and He Said She Said I Said 7 Keys to Relationship Success. This book offers the necessary and critical ingredients of creating a solid blended family. These principles can strengthen the parent relationship. Parents will be providing a positive role model for their children to see and families will become more cohesive by using the recipe of shared family identity. A small workbook section helps the reader put into action the concepts suggested by Barbara. By practicing such principles as flexibility and trust, the two of you can forge connections that can support each individual of the family, even into the next generation. “‘You’re NOT my dad!’ How do I even respond to that? What would my wife want me to say? These problems are so difficult to navigate. I am happy to see this book come along. I can’t wait to start cooking!” —Steve, stepdad “Barbara Peters shares effective strategies that empower blended families to be successful, such as building trust, working together to create the family they desire, and good advice on what not to say about ‘exes’. The recipe format is delightfully creative to read and practical to use.” —Elisabeth Davies, author and mental health counselor “I have performed numerous wedding ceremonies for brides and grooms who haven’t a clue of the blended family issues to come. This book provides guidance for the conversations couples must have prior to the ‘I dos’ with the kids. This is a book you must read before you create a mess in your blended family kitchen.” —Larry James, author of How to Really Love the One You’re With

According to experts, being involved in a prior marriage decreases the success rate of subsequent marriages. The aim of this book is to reduce the failure rate of remarriages and to promote the success of blended families. Successful Blended Families addresses the common challenges of blended family life and provides practical tools for dealing with them effectively. Attention is given to children in these families, step-parenting, preparation for remarriage as well as the building blocks for a successful blended family. If you are in a blended family or planning to establish such a family, this book is for you. If you are a professional who works with blended families or you simply want to gain more insight and understanding of blended family life, this book is worth reading.

Love may be sweeter the second time around, but once the bliss of a newfound relationship wears off a little, the reality of being part of a stepfamily sets in. If you are one of the millions of remarried Americans facing the challenge of blending two existing families into one cohesive whole, you are part of a stepcouple—and you know all too well how hard it can be to make your marriage work in sometimes tough terrain. Different parenting styles, finances, relationships with ex-spouses, legal matters, and even seemingly simple issues such as the kinds of chores assigned to children can chisel away at your union if you don’t always make your marriage a priority. Stepcoupling offers advice for stepcouples on how to do just that—all the while strengthening their blended family with a healthy marriage. Susan Wisdom and Jennifer Green provide tips and strategies on dealing with the issues remarried couples face, with a wealth of advice from real-life stepcouples, such as: * Learning to tailor your expectations of your spouse or children and remembering that no family is perfect * Knowing where your boundaries are, whether involving a hostile ex-spouse or a stepchild who demands too much attention * Realizing that traits like flexibility, tolerance, forgiveness, and openness are especially essential in a stepfamily situation * Making “us” time for talking, problem-solving, weekends away, and enjoying your marriage to constantly renew and strengthen your bond as a couple Let this invaluable remarriage manual help you make your stepcouple the foundation of a strong, happy, and successful stepfamily.