Constructing The M Other

Constructing the (M)other is a collection of personal narratives about motherhood in the context of a society in which disability holds a stigmatized position. From multiple vantage points, these autoethnographies reveal how ableist beliefs about disability are institutionally upheld and reified. Collectively they seek to call attention to a patriarchal surveillance of mothering, challenge the trope of the good mother, and dismantle the constructed hierarchy of acceptable children. The stories contained in this volume are counter-narratives of resistance--they are the devices through which mothers push back. Rejecting notions of the otherness of their children, in these essays, mothers negotiate their identities and claim access to the category of normative motherhood. Readers are likely to experience dissonance, have their assumptions about disability challenged, and find their parameters of normalcy transformed.

Constructing the (M)other is a collection of personal narratives about motherhood in the context of a society in which disability holds a stigmatized position. From multiple vantage points, these autoethnographies reveal how ableist beliefs about disability are institutionally upheld and reified. Collectively they seek to call attention to a patriarchal surveillance of mothering, challenge the trope of the good mother, and dismantle the constructed hierarchy of acceptable children. The stories contained in this volume are counter-narratives of resistance--they are the devices through which mothers push back. Rejecting notions of the otherness of their children, in these essays, mothers negotiate their identities and claim access to the category of normative motherhood. Readers are likely to experience dissonance, have their assumptions about disability challenged, and find their parameters of normalcy transformed.

Theologian Erin S. Lane overturns dominant narratives about motherhood and inspires women to write their own stories. Is it possible to do something more meaningful than mothering? As a young Catholic girl who grew up in the American Midwest on white bread and Jesus, Erin S. Lane was given two options for a life well-lived: Mother or Mother Superior. She could marry a man and mother her own children, or she could marry God, so to speak, and mother the world’s children. Both were good outcomes for someone else’s life. Neither would fit the shape of hers. Interweaving Lane’s story with those of other women—including singles and couples, stepparents and foster parents, the infertile and the ambivalent—Someone Other Than a Mother challenges the social scripts that put moms on an impossible pedestal and shame childless women and nontraditional families for not measuring up. You may have heard these lines before: • “Motherhood is the toughest job.” This script diminishes the work of non-moms and pressures moms to make parenting their full-time gig. • “It’ll be different with your own.” This script underestimates the love of nonbiological kin and pushes unfair expectations onto nuclear families. • “Family is the greatest legacy.” This script turns children into the ultimate sign of a woman’s worth and discounts the quieter ways we leave our mark. With candor and verve, Someone Other Than a Mother tears up the shaming social scripts that are bad for moms and non-moms alike and rewrites the story of a life well-lived, one in which purpose is bigger than body parts, identity is fuller than offspring, and legacy is so much more than DNA.

What makes a good mother? Are some women just born naturally maternal, or do mothers discover that part of themselves once they have a child? Now a renowned expert on the subject–and herself a mother of three–addresses the unspoken worries and fears that accompany motherhood and shares the reassuring message that every mother learns “on the job.” Dr. Valerie Davis Raskin has worked with more than four hundred mothers in twenty years of clinical practice and has discovered that mothering is just as developmental as childhood. Dr. Raskin identifies the nine challenges facing mothers from their child’s infancy to young adulthood, pivotal moments that put mothers to the test time and again–and yet from which they can emerge truly rewarded. • IDENTITY: How to gain confidence during those overwhelming first months after you’ve given birth or adopted, but don’t yet “feel” like a mother. • UNLOVING MOMENTS: Every mother’s secret guilt–learn to accept those not-so-precious moments when you don’t like the child you love so dearly. • HONORING THE FATHER: Tips for helping Dad stop feeling like a third wheel and bond with his child (and receive attention from you!). • SEPARATION: How to maintain a positive outlook on your child’s milestones, from the first day of preschool to packing him off to sleepaway camp. • SETTING LIMITS: How to put your foot down, even when your child kicks, screams, or cries. • IMPERFECT INSTITUTIONS: How to cope when your child does not have the best teacher or the most inspiring coach, or faces a less than fair grading system. • REVISED DREAMS: Your cute five-year-old in a pink tutu has no rhythm. Your nine-year-old cannot catch a ball. Learn to modify your dreams for your child–and follow your child’s dreams instead. • ADVERSITY: You can’t keep your child in a plastic bubble, but you can take a deep breath, relax, and be there for her when life gets tough. • SAYING GOODBYE: Discover the joys of loving your adult child while not living under the same roof. This wonderfully anecdotal, engaging, and accessible book is nothing less than an essential training manual for mothers of all ages. The bottom line: Just because motherhood is sometimes difficult, confusing, intense, sleepless, and frustrating, doesn’t mean mothers aren’t doing it right!

Easy-to-read text with full-color illustrations present a collection of perennial Mother Goose favorites.

Filled with fun, exciting, poignant tales of mother-daughter travel, this unique celebration of a special relationship follows mothers and daughters on trips to Africa, Canada, Asia, and other locales. Original.

This volume highlights the role of language ideologies in the process of negotiation of identities and shows that in different historical and social contexts different identities may be negotiable or non-negotiable.