Families We Choose

This study brings together two areas of investigation: relationships of gay and lesbian individuals with their biological families, and lesbian and gay relationships in the context of research on alternative forms of family.

Kath Weston draws upon fieldwork and interviews conducted in the San Francisco Bay area to explore the ways in which gay men and lesbians are constructing their own notions of kinship by drawing on the symbolism of love, friendship and biology. Conventional views of family have depicted gays and lesbians as exiles from the realm of kinship. In recent decades, however, gay men and lesbians have increasingly portrayed themselves as people who seek not only to maintain ties with blood or adoptive relatives but also to establish families of their own.

Why LGBTQ adults don’t end troubled ties with parents and why (perhaps) they should Families We Keep is a surprising look at the life-long bonds between LGBTQ adults and their parents. Alongside the importance of “chosen families” in the queer community, Rin Reczek and Emma Bosley-Smith found that very few LGBTQ people choose to become estranged from their parents, even if those parent refuse to support their gender identity, sexuality, or both. Drawing on interviews with over seventy-five LGBTQ people and their parents, Reczek and Bosley-Smith explore the powerful ties that bind families together, for better or worse. They show us why many feel obliged to maintain even troubled—and sometimes outright toxic—relationships with their parents. They argue that this relationship persists because what we think of as the “natural” and inevitable connection between parents and adult children is actually created and sustained by the sociocultural power of compulsory kinship. After revealing what holds even the most troubled intergenerational ties together, Families We Keep gives us permission to break free of those family bonds that are not in our best interests. Reczek and Bosley-Smith challenge our deep-rooted conviction that family—and specifically, our relationships with our parents—should be maintained at any cost. Families We Keep shines a light on the shifting importance of family in America, and how LGBTQ people navigate its complexities as adults.

Winner of the 2018 Choice Outstanding Academic Title Over the past two decades, same-sex couples raising children have become more visible within US political and popular culture. Thanks to widely circulated images of well-mannered, well-dressed, and well-off two-parent families, a select number of LGBT-identified parents have gained recognition as model American citizens. In Familiar Perversions, Liz Montegary shows how this seemingly progressive view of same-sex parenting has taken shape during a period of growing racial inequality and economic insecurity in the United States. This book evaluates the recent successes of the “family equality” movement, while asking important questions about its relationship to neoliberalism, the policing of sexual cultures, and the broader context of social justice organizing at the turn of the twenty-first century. Montegary’s investigation of the politics of LGBT family life takes us on a journey that includes not only activist events and the courtrooms where landmark decisions about same-sex families were made, but also parenting workshops, cruise ships, and gay resort towns. Through its sustained historical analysis, Familiar Perversions lays critical groundwork for imagining a queer family movement that can support and strengthen the diverse networks of care, kinship, and intimacy on which our collective survival depends.

Our Families, Our Values challenges both the gay community and American society to examine carefully the meaning of family values and the nature of social institutions such as marriage and the family. It asks you provoking, even disturbing, questions such as: “Is it prudent for members of the Lavender community to mimic heterosexual marriage or define personal relations networks as families, when these institutions are rapidly collapsing?” “Are we attempting to mainstream American society into accepting different views of marriage and families?” “Are we subscribing to notions of sexual property that are inherent to the marriage ceremony and the institution of marriage, when we choose to be married?” Despite the complexities of this issue, marriage constitutes a privileged position in western society, and, as this book shows you, without the legal recognition of same-sex marriages, there are many fundamental rights, as well as privileges, denied to gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgendered persons. As Our Families, Our Values turns upside-down the widely accepted notion that only heterosexual people are entitled to get married, have sex, and rear children, you gain insight into personal struggles and affirmations that testify to the spirituality, procreativity, and wholesomeness of the diverse relationships of the Lavender community. You will also learn about various ongoing efforts to give religious pride to the various configurations of gay relationships, families, and values and the disruption of popular interpretations of the Scriptures that have been used to justify the oppression of sexual minorities. This book will intrigue you over and over again, as you read about: value systems transphobia equal marriage rights Buddhism’s rejection of “traditional family values” Brazil’s sex-positive culture differences between gay male social formations and families choosing a language and terms that empower sexual minorities and the essence of the liberation movement sex as communion relationships based on nurture, not transaction Designed for academics and students of religion, pastors, priests, rabbis, and lay readers alike, Our Families, Our Values is a multifaceted view of the gay community’s response to the public controversy over gay marriage, adoption, and foster care rights. Ideal as a textbook for courses in sexuality, theology, sociology, women’s studies, and gay and lesbian studies, this book will both inform you and delight you as it reminds you that same-sex unions bring much cause for celebration and that religion and homosexuality are not mutually exclusive.

A rhyming, light-hearted celebration of the wonderful differences that make each family unique. A family can be Any kind of number Maybe there's one parent Strong like thunder This charmingly heartfelt board book is for families: families who cook together and families who sing together, families with lots of members and families with a special few, families who live together and families who live separately--for all families. Celebrate the differences that make each family unique and the similarities and love that connect us all together.

From the trusted team of Robie H. Harris and Michael Emberley, a classic resource for younger children receives its most ambitiously updated edition yet. How does a baby begin and how is it born? How did I begin? Why are some parts of kids’ bodies different from some parts of other kids’ bodies? Most younger kids have questions about reproduction, babies, love, sex, and gender, too. Some also have concerns. For over twenty years, It’s So Amazing! has provided children age seven and up with the honest answers they’re looking for through age-appropriate, reassuring words and accurate, up-to-date, inclusive art. Throughout the book, two cartoon characters, Bird and Bee, are the voices of kids. They talk together to help children feel that they are not the only ones wondering how we all began. Rigorously vetted by experts and featuring updated and new facts on pregnancy, birth, adoption, bodies, sexuality, gender identity, OK touches, not OK touches, straight and LGBTQ+ families and people, and many other topics, this comprehensive resource for kids, parents, librarians, teachers, booksellers, and healthcare providers is the book that can help younger kids and their families talk together and find answers to their many questions.

No matter your size, shape, or pedigree--if you love each other, you are a family! Moms, dads, sisters, brothers — and even Great Aunt Sue — appear in dozens of combinations, demonstrating all kinds of nontraditional families! Silly animals are cleverly depicted in framed portraits, and offer a warm celebration of family love. From School Library Journal PreS-Gr 1—Imagine a house with many rooms, whose walls each have a different color or wallpaper, accenting a family portrait hanging there. On a rustic wooden wall hangs the first portrait—a large family of ducks posing beside a still pond. The next spread shows three pandas in pink vests, much like the pink oriental wallpaper behind them. Each portrait features a gently rhyming line: "Some children live with their grandparents…/and some live with an aunt./Some children have many pets…/and some just have a plant." All of these appealing images demonstrate different ways of being a family. "Some children live with their father./ Some children have two mothers./Some children are adopted./Some have stepsisters and—brothers." The cartoon-style critters contrast pleasantly with more realistic elements—a bamboo plant, a slender ceramic dog, a fat ceramic cat. Families of hippos, tigers, lions, ostriches, and whales join the other family groups in the final spread. The loud-and-clear message is that "if you love each other, then you are a family." And imagine the many children who will be reassured because they have found a portrait of a family they will recognize as their own. A solid choice for most libraries.—Mary Jean Smith, formerly at Southside Elementary School, Lebanon, TN