Mommy Cusses

For fans of Go the F*ck to Sleep, Mommy Cusses is a hilarious novelty parenting book full of tell-it-like-it-is quotes, snarky lists, and too-true anecdotes that will resonate with new moms everywhere. For new-ish mothers who need to laugh at the absurdity of parenting so they don't cry, who are looking for a we're-in-this-together sense of solidarity, and who don't have time to read a "real" book, here is a hilarious and highly relatable collection of mom malarkey. There are real-talk quotes, helpful lists (such as "How to Look Like You Have Your Act Together"), "mom-tivities," and quizzes, all delivered with a healthy dose of sarcasm. Packaged in a handy trim size with colorful illustrations throughout, Mommy Cusses is the perfect gift for moms and moms-to-be who need some comic relief. • GREAT GIFT: Mommy Cusses is super relatable and laugh-out-loud funny, making it an easy gift for Mother's Day or a baby shower, or an anytime gift for a parent. • PERENNIAL TOPIC: It doesn't take long to experience all the ups and downs of parenting. Mommy Cusses features timeless mommy humor that won't go out of style and a fresh look and feel that speaks to young parents. Perfect for: • Expectant parents and parents of children under 5 • Shoppers looking for a baby shower or Mother's Day gift for a friend, spouse, or daughter • Followers of the Mommy Cusses blog or Instagram account

Based on his widely read columns for The New Yorker, Ian Frazier's uproarious first novel, The Cursing Mommy's Book of Days, centers on a profoundly memorable character, sprung from an impressively fertile imagination. Structured as a daybook of sorts, the book follows the Cursing Mommy—beleaguered wife of Larry and mother of two boys, twelve and eight—as she tries (more or less) valiantly to offer tips on how to do various tasks around the home, only to end up on the ground, cursing, surrounded by broken glass. Her voice is somewhere between Phyllis Diller's and Sylvia Plath's: a hilariously desperate housewife with a taste for swearing and large glasses of red wine, who speaks to the frustrations of everyday life. Frazier has demonstrated an astonishing ability to operate with ease in a variety of registers: from On the Rez, an investigation into the lives of modern day Oglala Sioux written with a mix of humor, compassion, and imagination, to Dating Your Mom, a sidesplitting collection of humorous essays that imagines, among other things, how and why you might begin a romance with your mother. Here, Frazier tackles another genre with his usual grace and aplomb, as well as an extra helping of his trademark wicked wit. The Cursing Mommy's failures and weaknesses are our own—and Frazier gives them a loving, satirical spin that is uniquely his own.

AN INSTANT NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER! Join the millions of fans who love Momma Cusses, TikTok’s #1 Parenting Unexpert! There are lots of experts out there who will tell you they have the magic recipe to raising perfect humans. Gwenna Laithland is not one of them. She’s one of us. Frustrated, overwhelmed, and exhausted. Her relatable representation of parenthood validates our experiences. In Momma Cusses, Gwenna uses her signature style of snark and sarcasm to explain her interpretation of responsive parenting vs. reactive parenting and outline the steps she takes to raise her kids. Whether you are a parent or someone who has had a parent, we all need to learn how to handle our emotional spirals responsively. Now we can all be in it together by tackling some of the hilarious yet all-too-real scenarios Gwenna outlines in her book, including: YOU WILL LOSE YOUR SH*T: Mom guilt vs. mom shame ARE YOU YELLING OR ARE YOU JUST BEING LOUD?: Get in control of your emotions THE BIG FEELS LOOP-DE-LOO: Get in control of their emotions Accessible, digestible, and rooted in reality, Momma Cusses helps readers with navigating family dynamics and cultivating emotional resilience for everyone.

With this helpful guide, learn to tell people off like a native no matter where you are in the world. An essential phrasebook for the world traveler, How to Swear Around the World features dozens of favorite curses, insults, and sayings from all over the globe. Get rid of a pesky hanger-on in Brazil by telling him to dig for potatoes—vai ceifar batatas. To express disgust toward your brown-nosing German friend, accuse him of being a bicycle-rider—radfahrer, or tell someone off in Laos by letting him know you think his mother enjoys keeping intimate company with dogs—Ma see mea mung! Make new friends and enemies abroad with this handy guide filled with fighting words, scatological expressions, dozens of ways to insult someone’s mother, and many other suitably offensive phrases. Also features phonetic pronunciations and handy illustrations to provide guidance to these colorful exclamations. “As useful as it is hilarious, Sacher’s How to Swear Around the World teaches readers all kinds of vulgar phrases in dozens of different languages. Feel free to call Expedia and curse out their airfare prices using any of the book’s quotes.” —Complex.com

A hilarious and reassuring gift for every mom: because we’re all doing the best we can, and the natural world is filled with moms worse than you! A mom giraffe is pretty nice until the fetus drops. She’ll birth a newborn baby calf, then kick him ’til he walks. Whenever you feel guilty that you haven’t cleaned the house: Sexton beetles raise their kids in a decomposing mouse. A koala mom will feed her kids her own poop. Yes, poop. Panda moms will abandon one twin because raising two is, well, just too much. And every now and then a cuddly little hamster mom will —yup— eat her newborn pups. These and other true facts from the animal kingdom offer a hilarious reality check on what constitutes “good parenting.” So, human mother, time to stop worrying about the job you're doing —because you’re a great mom.

If you’re a mom (or mom-to-be) who wants to raise decent human beings, maintain your pre-baby identity, and not lose your sh*t along the way, congrats: you’ve just found the parenting book of your dreams. The Rebel Mama’s Handbook for (Cool) Moms is a girlfriend’s guide to early motherhood. It’s the Coles Notes for all those boring baby books you never read. It’s the instruction manual you wish your kid(s) came with - complete with cocktail list. Welcome to motherhood. Let’s do this.

From an Emmy Award–winning comedy writer: “An absolute must for every parent who needs to laugh so they don’t cry.” —Bunmi Laditan, author of Confessions of a Domestic Failure From the comedian behind the popular parenting blog The Ugly Volvo comes a refreshing spin on the baby milestone book. Instead of a place to lovingly capture the first time baby sleeps through the night, this book commemorates baby’s first poop explosion; first time baby says a word you didn’t want her to say; and first time you forget the details of childbirth enough to consider having a second kid. Accompanied by distinctive illustrations, these one hundred rarely documented but all-too-realistic milestones provide comfort, solidarity, and comic relief for exhausted and terrified new parents.

Need a break . . . now? Horizontal Parenting offers 50 hilarious and effective activities designed to entertain kids while you lie down. Children are exhausting! In the marathon of modern parenting, everyone needs a break—just 10 precious minutes to rest your body and tune out the chaos. Enter Horizontal Parenting, the super-simple parenting hack for everyone, everywhere. With creative and practical advice for overworked parents and caretakers who "just need a minute," this book includes 50 fun, effective, and hilarious games to play with toddlers and children while lying down. Activities include: • What's on My Butt • Hide and Seek-ish • Don't Wake the Giant • Railroad to Relaxation • And many more! Relax and let your little ones release some energy while you catch your breath (and maybe a few even a few z's). All you need is a comfortable surface, a few household items, and your child's imagination, and you too can master the sanity-saving art of horizontal parenting. • 50 activities to keep your kids engaged and keep you lying down • Entertaining ideas for children and toddlers • No endless supply lists, screens, or batteries needed • Perfect for long days at home • Great gift for new (or seasoned!) parents Perfect for: parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, and caretakers of kids ages 2+