Stop In The Name Of Pants

Time to gird the loins and pucker up. Blimey O'Reilly's trousers! When Georgia embraced being the girlfriend of a Rock Legend/Luurve God, she thought that was the end of her lovenosity woes. As usual, Georgia is the last to know what she is talking about. Now there's the small matter of a snogging accident involving her matey-type mate Dave the Laugh and some toasted newts in her undercrackers. Can Georgia lock up her red bottom and throw away the key?

I was at my wit's end. I'd had enough of this job, this life, and my relationship had broken up. Should I eat chocolate, or go to India, or fall in love? Then I had a revelation: Why not do all three, in that order? And so it was that I embarked on a journey that was segmented into three parts and was then made into a major motion picture. Later, I woke up on an airplane with a hole in my face and a really bad hangover. I was ushered brusquely off the plane by my parents who took me to a rehab where I tested positive for coke, classic coke, special k (the drug), Special K (the cereal), mushrooms, pepperoni, and Restless Leg Syndrome. It was there that I first began painting with my feet. But rewind...the year was 1914. I was just a young German soldier serving in the trenches while simultaneously trying to destroy an evil ring with some help from an elf, a troll, and a giant sorcerer, all while cooking every recipe out of a Julia Child cookbook. What I'm trying to say is that there was a secret code hidden in a painting and I was looking for it with this girl who had a tattoo of a dragon! Let me clarify, it was the 1930s and a bunch of us were migrating out of Oklahoma, and I was this teenage wizard/CIA operative, okay? And, um then I floated off into the meta-verse as a ball of invisible energy that had no outer edge... Ugh, okay. None of this is true. I'm just kind of a normal guy from New Jersey who moved to New York, got into comedy, wrote this book about trying to write this book, and then moved to Alaska, became the mayor of a small town, spent $30,000 on underwear, and now I'm going to rule the world!!!

As I was going out of my bedroom door I remembered my nungas. Perhaps I should take some precautions to keep them under strict control. Maybe bits of Sellotape on the ends of them to keep them from doing anything alarming? I'd like to trust them, but they are very unreliable. The irrepressible heroine of the Michael L. Printz Honor Book Angus, Thongs and Full-Frontal Snogging is back, and funnier than ever! Georgia has finally landed Robbie the Sex God, but he's never around, and Georgia's ex, Dave the Laugh, is starting to look quite dreamy. Strangely, so does just about every other guy Georgia meets, even the new French teacher. In this third installment of Georgia's hilarious confessions, Georgia's "red bottomosity" is out of control! Whatever will happen next?

Hot Pants, long an underground classic, offers great basic sexual health information along with tried and true herbal treatments for common gynecological problems. "Patriarchy sucks," the authors begin. "It's robbed us of our autonomy and much of our history. We believe it's integral for women to be aware and in control of our own bodies." In that spirit, diagrams and herbal remedies teach you how to diagnose and heal many basic problems, including bladder infections, inducing your period, easing cramps and PMS, aphrodisiacs, and dealing with pregnancy. You'll learn herbal remedies to ease every stage of your menstrual cycle. This book deserves a place next to your copy of Our Bodies, Ourselves.

Okay, here goes. My name is Liv (not Olivia). I'm not technically a girl. I'm transgender. Which is a bit like being a Transformer, only not quite as cool because I probably won't get to save the world one day. Liv knows he was always meant to be a boy, but with his new school's terrible dress code, he can't even wear pants. Only skirts. Operation: Pants Project begins! The only way for Liv to get what he wants is to go after it himself. But to Liv, this isn't just a mission to change the policy—it's a mission to change his life. And that's a pretty big deal.

A young boy has trouble getting dressed one morning when his clothes decide to play hard to get.

Now a new MTV series, from acclaimed director and executive producer Doug Liman (“Mr. and Mrs. Smith, “Swingers,” “Go,” “The Bourne Identity”) Jason Strider is a twentysomething young man with an English degree from an Ivy League university, a very small apartment in New York, a vapid job as a receptionist at a casting agency—and no particular idea what to do with his life. On most evenings he gets stoned and goes out, sometimes with his long-time best friend and wingman Tina and sometimes alone, if not to get laid then at least to get hammered enough to really regret it the next day and be late for work. Then one night Jason has athletic, appliance-assisted intercourse with a cute girl named Jane—and ends up lending her his favorite Dickies jeans. Many unanswered e-mails and text messages later, he is reduced to the plaint “I just want my pants back.” How he does, in a most unexpected way, find those pants and how he is forced to face his immaturity—and mortality—are at the heart of this smart, raunchily comic and deeply affecting novel.

Loretta La Roche has helped millions of people find ways to lighten up and overcome stress. Now, in Life Is Short—Wear Your Party Pants, she gives you the tools you need to not only reduce feelings of tension, but also to bring joy, passion, and gusto into your life. Her techniques are a brilliant blend of old-world common sense and the most contemporary research in brain chemistry, psychology, and mind-body studies. Loretta gives you dozens of proven techniques for recognizing the ten simple truths that will lead you to an intense, happy, successful life: resilience, living in the moment, optimism, acceptance, humor, creativity, moderation, responsibility, meaning, and connection. Loretta’s wisdom evolved from her own life—one filled with the demands of being a single mother of three; of starting her own business when she was broke; and of the wacky invasiveness of her Italian family. She’s like all of us: real, flawed, stressed out, and on edge. Her magic comes from an ability to not take herself too seriously, and to always shift her focus away from the self-destructive and toward the truly important things in life. In her work, Loretta has seen tens of thousands of people who live their lives as if they’re sitting in a waiting room, hoping that their turn comes up next. This book will show you that life is not something to be endured, but is something to be truly appreciated. We need to remember how to access our inner abundance, which allows us to be heart-centered, joy-filled human beings. As Loretta says: "Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, and today is a gift—that’s why they call it the present."