The Case Against Marriage

Against Marriage argues that marriage violates both equality and liberty and should not be recognized by the state. Clare Chambers shows how feminist and liberal principles require creation of a marriage-free state: one in which private marriages, whether religious or secular, would have nolegal status.Part One makes the case against marriage. Chambers investigates the critique of marriage that has developed within feminist and liberal theory. Feminists have long argued that state-recognised marriage is a violation of equality. Chambers endorses the feminist view and argues, in contrast to recentegalitarian pro-marriage movements, that same-sex marriage is not enough to make marriage equal. The egalitarian case against marriage is the most fundamental argument of Against Marriage. But Chambers also argues that state-recognised marriage violates liberty, including the political liberalversion of liberty that is based on neutrality between conceptions of the good.Part Two sets out the case for the marriage-free state. Chambers criticizes recent arguments that traditional marriage should be replaced with either a reformed version of marriage, such as civil partnership, or a purely contractual model of relationship regulation. She then sets out a new model forthe legal regulation of personal relationships. Instead of regulating by status, the state should regulate relationships according to the practices they involve. Instead of regulating relationships holistically, assuming that relationship practices are bundled together in one significantrelationship, the marriage-free state regulates practices on a piecemeal basis. The marriage-free state thus employs piecemeal, practice-based regulation. It may regulate private marriages, including religious marriages, so as to protect equality. But it takes no interest in defining or protectingthe meaning of marriage.

Not just a critique of marriage but one of the best books EVER on romantic relationships and how they really work. What do people want from love? How do they think marriage will help them, and what does it really give them? Marriage is all about love, right? Actually, it's more about money. Behind the romantic language, marriage is primarily a financial agreement merging the assets and liabilities of two individuals into a single corporate entity. After your wedding, the money you earn and debts you incur are no longer legally yours; they belong to the marital "community"-a common pot that both of you contribute to and draw from. It's a lot like Communism: an idealistic sharing of resources and risks supposedly for the common good. What could go wrong with this plan? Pretty much the same things that brought down political Communism in the late 20th Century: It slows growth, suppresses initiative, dilutes responsibility and mires decisions in bureaucracy. Healthy relationships need clear boundaries, and marriage erases too many of them at once. Marriage was designed for medieval times. Back then, life was hard and short; most marriages were arranged, and a woman was essentially the property of her husband. Marriage was a sort of licensing system for sex and childbirth. Once the relationship was officially approved and the religious ceremony concluded, the couple's overriding goal was to produce as many children as possible, knowing that many would die. Times have changed. Birth control, longer life spans, sexual freedom and women's rights have rewritten the rules of matrimony. Under the laws of most Western countries, marriage is no longer a sex license or child-rearing contract, only a contract to merge financial resources. "It's only money," couples may say, but Glenn Campbell argues that love and money are separate issues that should be kept that way. In modern Western society, unmarried people can legally have sex, live together, raise children, buy property together and do nearly everything else associated with a committed relationship, so why do they need to marry at all? What are you really getting when you walk down the aisle? Is marriage merely a public announcement to make your relationship "official," or does it fundamentally change the relationship? With simple, powerful and accessible arguments, The Case Against Marriage explains why, if you truly love someone, marriage may not be the wisest way to show it.

Surely gays have the same right to marry that heterosexuals do? Isn't banning gays from marriage just like banning interracial marriage? How does someone's gay marriage threaten your family? It doesn't matter for children as long as they have two loving parents; But lots of other cultures have different ways of forming families. Why can't we?..... We all have heard these questions and concerns offered as ''reasons'' for why same-sex marriage should be allowed in our society. Do they point us to the truth, or are there good answers in response? How do we respond? This book shows you that there are very compelling, caring and commonsense ways to answer every argument you might encounter in this debate. It will arm you with cogent and loving answers so that you can be an intelligent and compassionate advocate for marriage. This book is written for people who care about marriage and care about people. It is written in a conversational way to help you easily answer questions about this issue that are swirling all around us in the public debate. It is written in very plain language and is well-documented by the latest research. We will equip you to understand and explain how harmful same-sex marriage and parenting can be to people and our culture, and why natural marriage between one man and one woman is so important to the health of humanity.

The Case Against MarriageWhat You're Really Getting. What You've Got To LoseNot just a critique of marriage but one of the best books EVER on romantic relationships and how they really work. What do people want from love? How do they think marriage will help them, and what does it really give them?Marriage is all about love, right? Actually, it's more about money. Behind the romantic language, marriage is primarily a financial agreement merging the assets and liabilities of two individuals into a single corporate entity. After your wedding, the money you earn and debts you incur are no longer legally yours; they belong to the marital "community"-a common pot that both of you contribute to and draw from. It's a lot like Communism: an idealistic sharing of resources and risks supposedly for the common good.What could go wrong with this plan? Pretty much the same things that brought down political Communism in the late 20th Century: It slows growth, suppresses initiative, dilutes responsibility and mires decisions in bureaucracy. Healthy relationships need clear boundaries, and marriage erases too many of them at once.Marriage was designed for medieval times. Back then, life was hard and short; most marriages were arranged, and a woman was essentially the property of her husband. Marriage was a sort of licensing system for sex and childbirth. Once the relationship was officially approved and the religious ceremony concluded, the couple's overriding goal was to produce as many children as possible, knowing that many would die.Times have changed. Birth control, longer life spans, sexual freedom and women's rights have rewritten the rules of matrimony. Under the laws of most Western countries, marriage is no longer a sex license or child-rearing contract, only a contract to merge financial resources. "It's only money," couples may say, but Glenn Campbell argues that love and money are separate issues that should be kept that way.In modern Western society, unmarried people can legally have sex, live together, raise children, buy property together and do nearly everything else associated with a committed relationship, so why do they need to marry at all? What are you really getting when you walk down the aisle? Is marriage merely a public announcement to make your relationship "official," or does it fundamentally change the relationship?With simple, powerful and accessible arguments, The Case Against Marriage explains why, if you truly love someone, marriage may not be the wisest way to show it.

An eye-opening, funny, painful, and always truthful in-depth examination of modern relationships and a wake-up call for single women about getting real about Mr. Right. You have a fulfilling job, great friends, and the perfect apartment. So what if you haven’t found “The One” just yet. He’ll come along someday, right? But what if he doesn’t? Or what if Mr. Right had been, well, Mr. Right in Front of You—but you passed him by? Nearing forty and still single, journalist Lori Gottlieb started to wonder: What makes for lasting romantic fulfillment, and are we looking for those qualities when we’re dating? Are we too picky about trivial things that don’t matter, and not picky enough about the often overlooked things that do? In Marry Him, Gottlieb explores an all-too-common dilemma—how to reconcile the desire for a happy marriage with a list of must-haves and deal-breakers so long and complicated that many great guys get misguidedly eliminated. On a quest to find the answer, Gottlieb sets out on her own journey in search of love, discovering wisdom and surprising insights from sociologists and neurobiologists, marital researchers and behavioral economists—as well as single and married men and women of all generations.

Until very recently, no society had seen marriage as anything other than a conjugal partnership: a male–female union. What Is Marriage? identifies and defends the reasons for this historic consensus and shows why redefining civil marriage as something other than the conjugal union of husband and wife is a mistake. Originally published in the Harvard Journal of Law and Public Policy, this book’s core argument quickly became the year’s most widely read essay on the most prominent scholarly network in the social sciences. Since then, it has been cited and debated by scholars and activists throughout the world as the most formidable defense of the tradition ever written. Now revamped, expanded, and vastly enhanced, What Is Marriage? stands poised to meet its moment as few books of this generation have. Sherif Girgis, Ryan T. Anderson, and Robert P. George offer a devastating critique of the idea that equality requires redefining marriage. They show why both sides must first answer the question of what marriage really is. They defend the principle that marriage, as a comprehensive union of mind and body ordered to family life, unites a man and a woman as husband and wife, and they document the social value of applying this principle in law. Most compellingly, they show that those who embrace same-sex civil marriage leave no firm ground—none—for not recognizing every relationship describable in polite English, including polyamorous sexual unions, and that enshrining their view would further erode the norms of marriage, and hence the common good. Finally, What Is Marriage? decisively answers common objections: that the historic view is rooted in bigotry, like laws forbidding interracial marriage; that it is callous to people’s needs; that it can’t show the harm of recognizing same-sex couplings or the point of recognizing infertile ones; and that it treats a mere “social construct” as if it were natural or an unreasoned religious view as if it were rational.

The idea of this book began in a conversation David Blankenhorn had with the president of Freedom to Marry, a group advocating equal marriage rights for same-sex couples. This man asked Blankenhorn, a leading figure in the “marriage movement,” to endorse his group’s objectives. Feeling a bit defensive, Blankenhorn replied, “Every child deserves a mother and a father.” The Future of Marriage is the result of that conversation. In their current demands, Blankenhorn points out, gay and lesbian leaders are not asking for marriage with an adjective in front of it, but marriage itself. So in that sense, what marriage is and why it matters is ultimately what this debate is all about. What exactly is this institution to which gay and lesbian activists are seeking access? Why do we have it in the first place? Where did it come from? What is it for? How is it changing? These are some of the hard questions The Future of Marriage confronts. David Blankenhorn says that if same sex marriage debate is to be “redemptive rather than merely divisive,” it must accept the principle that all persons are equal in dignity. But it must also help us to rediscover and renew marriage as the main protector of our children and our primary social institution.

“After years of debate and inquiry, the key to a great marriage remained shrouded in mystery. Until now...”—Carol Dweck, author of Mindset: The New Psychology of Success Eli J. Finkel's insightful and ground-breaking investigation of marriage clearly shows that the best marriages today are better than the best marriages of earlier eras. Indeed, they are the best marriages the world has ever known. He presents his findings here for the first time in this lucid, inspiring guide to modern marital bliss. The All-or-Nothing Marriage reverse engineers fulfilling marriages—from the “traditional” to the utterly nontraditional—and shows how any marriage can be better. The primary function of marriage from 1620 to 1850 was food, shelter, and protection from violence; from 1850 to 1965, the purpose revolved around love and companionship. But today, a new kind of marriage has emerged, one oriented toward self-discover, self-esteem, and personal growth. Finkel combines cutting-edge scientific research with practical advice; he considers paths to better communication and responsiveness; he offers guidance on when to recalibrate our expectations; and he even introduces a set of must-try “lovehacks.” This is a book for the newlywed to the empty nester, for those thinking about getting married or remarried, and for anyone looking for illuminating advice that will make a real difference to getting the most out of marriage today.