The Denial Of Aging

You’ve argued politics with your aunt since high school, but failing eyesight now prevents her from keeping current with the newspaper. Your mother fractured her hip last year and is confined to a wheelchair. Your father has Alzheimer’s and only occasionally recognizes you. Someday, as Muriel Gillick points out in this important yet unsettling book, you too will be old. And no matter what vitamin regimen you’re on now, you will likely one day find yourself sick or frail. How do you prepare? What will you need? With passion and compassion, Gillick chronicles the stories of elders who have struggled with housing options, with medical care decisions, and with finding meaning in life. Skillfully incorporating insights from medicine, health policy, and economics, she lays out action plans for individuals and for communities. In addition to doing all we can to maintain our health, we must vote and organize—for housing choices that consider autonomy as well as safety, for employment that utilizes the skills and wisdom of the elderly, and for better management of disability and chronic disease. Most provocatively, Gillick argues against desperate attempts to cure the incurable. Care should focus on quality of life, not whether it can be prolonged at any cost. “A good old age,” writes Gillick, “is within our grasp.” But we must reach in the right direction.

A philosopher and a lawyer-economist examine the challenges of the last third of life. They write about friendship, sex, retirement communities, inheritance, poverty, and the depiction of aging women in films. These essays, or conversations, will help readers of all ages think about how to age well, or at least thoughtfully, and how to interact with older family members and friends.

Aging comes with many challenges. It is well known that as a society we are living much longer thanks to improved living conditions and health care. While being able to reach old age is something to be thankful for, in many ways, there are several challenges facing the elderly, which we all need to pay more attention to. Often it is not until we start to age ourselves or we see a loved one struggling that we sit up and take notice, but as a society, we can do more to make life easier for our aging population. This book takes a clear-headed, cold-blooded, practical, and unemotional methodological approach to the myriad subjects that form the aging landscape, especially for the really old. This book observes older people and researches all of the aspects of elder-land, including frequent journeys into the medical complexes that have grown exponentially with the aging of the baby boomers. You will be taken down the road of things to come, and it is not all the golden years crap that you've heard about. We've all watched far too many people age badly and make some serious errors. For some of them, their mistake was simply living too long. We are constantly fed stories about people doing young things at an old age and are told that we can, too, if only we have the right attitude. The author thinks that's a bunch of baloney. Sure you could go skydiving at my age-once. But, if you survived you may never be able to walk again. The truth is that those people who do exceptional physical things at an advanced age are "EXCEPTIONAL!" Most of us need to keep our aging legs firmly planted on solid ground and get rid of the silly notions that we, too, can be exceptional. Most of us have been a victim of the advertising hype, but until we have gone through the emotional and psychological transformation of aging we really don't get it.

While many societies embrace aging, ours shuns it. We hide signs of aging and whistle past our mortality. We have euphemisms to avoid the "D" word. We create a new apartheid-based on age-that keeps elders segregated in assisted living facilities and nursing homes. All this fear of aging-our denial-undervalues time and erodes our self esteem. Imagine the tremendous benefits of coming to terms with aging.

A guide to some of the most important decisions that come in one's mature years, for example: Accept the senior citizen discount or feign indignation?

Vanity Fair columnist Michael Kinsley escorts his fellow Boomers through the door marked "Exit." The notorious baby boomers—the largest age cohort in history—are approaching the end and starting to plan their final moves in the game of life. Now they are asking: What was that all about? Was it about acquiring things or changing the world? Was it about keeping all your marbles? Or is the only thing that counts after you’re gone the reputation you leave behind? In this series of essays, Michael Kinsley uses his own battle with Parkinson’s disease to unearth answers to questions we are all at some time forced to confront. “Sometimes,” he writes, “I feel like a scout from my generation, sent out ahead to experience in my fifties what even the healthiest Boomers are going to experience in their sixties, seventies, or eighties.” This surprisingly cheerful book is at once a fresh assessment of a generation and a frequently funny account of one man’s journey toward the finish line. “The least misfortune can do to make up for itself is to be interesting,” he writes. “Parkinson’s disease has fulfilled that obligation.”

This book offers a concise, comprehensive resource for middle-aged readers who are facing the prospects of their own aging and of caring for elderly relatives—an often overwhelming task for which little in life prepares us. Everyone ages, and nearly everyone will also experience having to support aging relatives. Being prepared is the best way to handle this inevitable life stage. This book addresses a breadth of topics that are relevant to aging and caring for the elderly, analyzing each thoroughly and providing up-to-date, practical advice. It can serve as a concise and comprehensive resource read start-to-finish to plan for an individual's own old age or to anticipate the needs of aging relatives, or as a quick-reference guide on specific issues and topics as relevant to each reader's situation and needs. Using an interdisciplinary approach, Aging with a Plan: How a Little Thought Today Can Vastly Improve Your Tomorrow develops recommendations for building sustainable social, legal, medical, and financial support systems that can promote a good quality of life throughout the aging process. Chapters address critical topics such as retirement savings and expenses, residential settings, legal planning, the elderly and driving, long-term care, and end-of-life decisions. The author combines analysis of recent research on the challenges of aging with engaging anecdotes and personal observations. By following the recommendations in this book, readers in their 40s, 50s, and early 60s will greatly benefit from learning about the issues regarding aging in the 21st century—and from investing some effort in planning for their old age and that of their loved ones.