The Responsive Marriage

When you marry, your heart overflows with enthusiasm, exhilaration, and optimism. You can’t wait to start a new life with this one whose mere presence or voice causes an abundance of feel-good neurotransmitters to flood your brain. But soon after, differences in temperament, gender, family of origin, and marital expectations collide. You discover that the characteristics and behaviors you once found attractive in your mate, are now sources of irritation and frustration. Conflict erupts, causing reactivity in your temperament to surface more often. Before long, your dialogue degrades with frequent accusations and debates about perspective. In The Responsive Marriage, Dr. Donald W. Welch shows you the enemy in this fight isn’t your spouse. Unmanaged reactivity, those involuntary and unregulated reactive messages you inadvertently send your spouse when you’re triggered, is the culprit. Using practical tools and methods, sound biblical principles, and scientifically verified practices, he teaches you to recognize reactivity, understand its origin, and work together to eliminate it. Imagine a marriage with these characteristics: • No fights • Full choice and voice expression • Being fully understood • Constant positivity and thanksgiving Too good to be true? Come discover that this kind of marriage is within your reach.

Our relationships define every aspect of our lives. Our behaviors, attitudes, actions, values, and beliefs are shaped through our life Relationships. Almost all of us have experienced emotional, physical, and even psychological hurts and wounds from our relationships with parents, siblings, lovers, colleagues, and friends in society. Mary Muinamu is a counseling psychologist, relationship coach, and founder of Relationships Powerlift. Her passion for healthy relationships developed at a very tender age when she noticed that many people were struggling with relationships, especially in marriage. This desire for flourishing relationships drove her into studying Counseling Psychology and writing this book. A responsive spouse is an initial step in dealing with some of these issues. A spouse who is receptive to their spouse's needs is likely to understand them more, minimize conflict, and handle them appropriately. A responsive spouse enlightens and enables you to spot and identify your spouse's various needs and address them accordingly. It also helps to bring healing to hurting marriages. It is an eye-opener for those who are single and those who are married. This book will not leave you the same. It has a wealth of knowledge that many people discover after many years of marriage. I t is not a mystery to come to terms with your spouse's needs and be in a position to meet them. We all understand that we need to meet each other's needs, but we sometimes try to assume this for whatever reasons. However, this is for our good if we want a happy and lasting relationship. Many people argue that people change after marriage. However, this is not the case. Most likely, those who seem to change after union were acting during courtship because they never wanted to lose their spouse. That is why even when you start a relationship, it should be normal to disagree on some things. The nature of man is to put a facade and especially to those he or she wants to deceive with his or her reputation. However, a natural person who is true to himself or herself does not mind what the other person might think of him or her as long as he is true to himself or herself. A real man or woman will love you for who you are and learn to accommodate your weaknesses. I am that kind of a person whereby if I decide I will not do something, I will not do it no matter what. I did not know my husband was interested in me when we were young and single, and this aspect of my character used to come out quite often. 109 A Responsive Spouse When he proposed, I remember I asked him how daring he was to love me with that character. His response to me was, "I knew you were not acting. I also wanted someone who could challenge me."Develop your character and be you. The things you consider off and unpleasing may not be as bad as you think before your lover; let them come out.

A collection of the best contemporary essays on the theology and ethics of marriage.

This progressive volume takes a nuanced approach to understanding systemic therapies with diverse client populations, leading to culturally responsive therapy. Synthesizing diverse streams of psychology, philosophy, and social theory, chapters focus on cutting-edge issues in couple and family therapy including social justice, power, and privilege in therapy, the role of evidence-based practices, and integrative approaches to couple and family therapy. Each contributor is either a recent immigrant to the U.S. or a person of color, bringing unique personal lenses and experiences to the exploration of the topics. And coverage also makes clear what white therapists need to learn—and unlearn—before they can work responsively with clients of color. This practice-building reference: Combines research with applied knowledge in its treatment of topics. Adapts systemic therapy practice into today’s culturally diverse contexts. Explores themes of power, privilege, and social justice in each chapter. Presents multiculturalism in terms of therapeutic responsiveness. Critiques approaches to systemic therapy with immigrant clients and clients of color. Challenges readers to access deeper concepts and realities of self, other, and trust. Updating familiar takes on cultural competence with both local and global implications, Cross-Cultural Responsiveness and Systemic Therapy describes numerous opportunities for and challenges to couple and family therapy, as well as cross-disciplinary opportunities for incorporating social justice and cultural responsiveness in training and supervision of couple and family therapists.

“Many people say you can fix a broken marriage, but Mark and Jill show you how.” —Dr. Juli Slattery, psychologist, author, and president of Authentic Intimacy No marriage is perfect. But every marriage can get better. Do you feel like the spark is gone? Like a critical spirit has invaded your marriage? Like you want more intimacy, but something is in the way? You could be suffering from the Perfection Infection. The Perfection Infection happens when we cultivate unrealistic expectations of ourselves and our spouse, gradually leading to intimacy-killing behavior, also known as the “Seven Slow Fades.” That was the case for Jill and Mark Savage, and it eventually led to infidelity. In No More Perfect Marriages they speak honestly about their struggles, how they came back from betrayal, and the principles keeping their marriage strong today. They guide you in everything you need to know to kick the Perfection Infection right out and return to intimacy. In their warm, honest, personable style, Jill and Mark discuss: How the Perfection Infection invades a marriage—even a good marriage How to detect and correct the Seven Slow Fades How to set and communicate realistic expectations What to do if your spouse just won’t change How to guard your marriage from the Perfection Infection for good Hurting marriages can heal, and good marriages can become great. It takes work, yes, but No More Perfect Marriages will give you the insights, language, and roadmap you need for the journey. So start today. GROUP RESOURCES: A leader’s guide is included in the back of the book. FREE video curriculum and additional group resources are available for No More Perfect Marriages at www.NoMorePerfect.com. _____ “[Replaces] the Hollywood mirage of a storybook romance with a healthy blueprint of a real and rock-solid relationships. If you're looking for an authentic story, practical how-to, and hope to build true and lasting love, you've found it." — Michele Cushatt, author, Undone: A Story of Making Peace With An Unexpected Life “… Will empower readers to create healthier responses when facing marital challenges… Excited [to add it] to our recommended resources for couples." — Michelle Nietert, licensed counselor “Vulnerable, honest, and helpful… If you want to improve, save, restore, or renew your marriage, read this book.” — Mike Baker, sr. pastor, Eastview Christian Church, Normal, Illinois “Encouraging and very practical!” — Shaunti Feldhahn, social researcher and bestselling author of For Women Only and For Men Only

The processes of modernization and globalization promise more wealth and health for many people. But they are also a threat to the stability and quality of marriage and family life. This new book -- at once sobering and constructive -- looks at the impact of these processes on marriage and asks what Christianity, in cooperation with other religions, can do to strengthen married life today. Among the deleterious effects of modernization and globalization on marriage are a worldwide drift of men away from the responsibility of parenthood and the tendency of mothers too readily to take on the task of childrearing alone. After looking at recent research on these and other problems, Don Browning suggests that the cure for modern marital disruption entails reforming and reconstructing the institution of marriage while also nurturing relevant forms of social support. Yet the effort to initiate a "world marriage revival" requires a complex cultural work, and Browning explores the key contributions that the religions of the world must make for such an effort to be successful.