We Have To Talk

“WE NEED TO TALK.” In this urgent and insightful book, public radio journalist Celeste Headlee shows us how to bridge what divides us--by having real conversations BASED ON THE TED TALK WITH OVER 10 MILLION VIEWS NPR's Best Books of 2017 Winner of the 2017 Silver Nautilus Award in Relationships & Communication “We Need to Talk is an important read for a conversationally-challenged, disconnected age. Headlee is a talented, honest storyteller, and her advice has helped me become a better spouse, friend, and mother.” (Jessica Lahey, author of New York Times bestseller The Gift of Failure) Today most of us communicate from behind electronic screens, and studies show that Americans feel less connected and more divided than ever before. The blame for some of this disconnect can be attributed to our political landscape, but the erosion of our conversational skills as a society lies with us as individuals. And the only way forward, says Headlee, is to start talking to each other. In We Need to Talk, she outlines the strategies that have made her a better conversationalist—and offers simple tools that can improve anyone’s communication. For example: BE THERE OR GO ELSEWHERE. Human beings are incapable of multitasking, and this is especially true of tasks that involve language. Think you can type up a few emails while on a business call, or hold a conversation with your child while texting your spouse? Think again. CHECK YOUR BIAS. The belief that your intelligence protects you from erroneous assumptions can end up making you more vulnerable to them. We all have blind spots that affect the way we view others. Check your bias before you judge someone else. HIDE YOUR PHONE. Don’t just put down your phone, put it away. New research suggests that the mere presence of a cell phone can negatively impact the quality of a conversation. Whether you’re struggling to communicate with your kid’s teacher at school, an employee at work, or the people you love the most—Headlee offers smart strategies that can help us all have conversations that matter.

The inspiration for the film starring Tilda Swinton and John C. Reilly, this resonant story of a mother’s unsettling quest to understand her teenage son’s deadly violence, her own ambivalence toward motherhood, and the explosive link between them remains terrifyingly prescient. Eva never really wanted to be a mother. And certainly not the mother of a boy who murdered seven of his fellow high school students, a cafeteria worker, and a much–adored teacher in a school shooting two days before his sixteenth birthday. Neither nature nor nurture exclusively shapes a child's character. But Eva was always uneasy with the sacrifices and social demotion of motherhood. Did her internalized dislike for her own son shape him into the killer he’s become? How much is her fault? Now, two years later, it is time for her to come to terms with Kevin’s horrific rampage, all in a series of startlingly direct correspondences with her estranged husband, Franklin. A piercing, unforgettable, and penetrating exploration of violence and responsibility, a book that the Boston Globe describes as “impossible to put down,” is a stunning examination of how tragedy affects a town, a marriage, and a family.

In this #1 New York Times bestseller, Ijeoma Oluo offers a revelatory examination of race in America Protests against racial injustice and white supremacy have galvanized millions around the world. The stakes for transformative conversations about race could not be higher. Still, the task ahead seems daunting, and it’s hard to know where to start. How do you tell your boss her jokes are racist? Why did your sister-in-law hang up on you when you had questions about police reform? How do you explain white privilege to your white, privileged friend? In So You Want to Talk About Race, Ijeoma Oluo guides readers of all races through subjects ranging from police brutality and cultural appropriation to the model minority myth in an attempt to make the seemingly impossible possible: honest conversations about race, and about how racism infects every aspect of American life. "Simply put: Ijeoma Oluo is a necessary voice and intellectual for these times, and any time, truth be told." ―Phoebe Robinson, New York Times bestselling author of You Can't Touch My Hair

Learn to start open, productive talks about money with your parents as they age As your parents age, you may find that you want or need to broach the often-difficult subject of finances. In Mom and Dad, We Need to Talk: How to Have Essential Conversations with Your Parents About Their Finances, you’ll learn the best ways to approach this issue, along with a wealth of financial and legal information that will help you help your parents into and through their golden years. Sometimes parents are reluctant to address money matters with their adult children, and topics such as long-term care, retirement savings (or lack thereof), and end-of-life planning can be particularly touchy. In this book, you’ll hear from others in your position who have successfully had “the talk” with their parents, and you’ll read about a variety of conversation strategies that can make talking finances more comfortable and more productive. Learn conversation starters and strategies to open the lines of communication about your parents’ finances Discover the essential financial and legal information you should gather from your parents to be prepared for the future Gain insight from others’ stories of successfully talking money with aging parents Gather the courage, hope, and motivation you need to broach difficult subjects such as care facilities and end-of-life plans For children of Baby Boomers and others looking to assist aging parents with their finances, Mom and Dad, We Need to Talk is a welcome and comforting read. Although talking money with your parents can be hard, you aren’t alone, and this book will guide you through the process of having fruitful financial conversations that lead to meaningful action.

“We have to talk.” For many men, these are the four worst words in the English language, especially when they're uttered by a female partner. But it doesn't have to be that way, argue Samuel Shem and Janet Surrey in their pathbreaking and practical new book. “Male relational dread”—that all-too-familiar reaction set off by women's “relational yearnings”—can be tamed, and in its place can emerge true satisfaction for men and women.To demonstrate how this is done, Shem and Surrey take us behind the scenes of their popular workshops. We hear couples speak intimately about anger, guilt, resentment, shame, and sex. We watch them wrestle collectively with the gender divide in their relationships—the deep disconnects, or “impasses,” that reflect the vastly different developmental paths men and women have traveled. We see couples learn to bridge the poles of dread and yearning, to emerge from isolation into mutuality. We witness their moments of sadness, humor, and, ultimately, discovery.Filled with moving stories of real people struggling with real problems, We Have to Talk shatters the “rules” and offers dramatic proof that men and women are not from different planets after all. It is certain to be seen as the relationship book for the new millennium.

Kids, It's Time We Have THE TALK because doing the sex-thing or doing the drug-thing can ruin a kid's life, but NOT doing The God-thing can ruin a kid's eternity. Using teachings from John Paul II, Fulton J. Sheen, Thomas Merton, Mother Teresa, and others, John R. VanBuskirk tells his kids about God & God-stuff, Living & Dying, Heaven & hell. VanBuskirk explains the purpose of life to his twenty-something-year-old kids and the importance of getting through life rather than merely being successful in it. He challenges his kids to: - Love the world more than any other creature God has ever given life to - Possess the heart of a servant and add to what God has created as one of His co-creators and partners - Know God in ways equal to the saints and angels in Heaven - Achieve a special, personal intimacy with God - an intimacy that the angels might envy Kids, It's Time We Have THE TALK will help you keep First-Things-First. It will enable you to explain why First-Things are First-Things. It's the talk parents are obligated to have with kids. It's the talk each of us is obligated to have with ourselves.

Human Resources worker Michael O'Neill describes his long march through the institutions of the Australian public service."He was explaining why he had just taken a very well-paidpublic service position in the upper echelon of the EducationDepartment. "Comrades," he said, "I have been on the long march through theinstitutions." There was enough auld lang syne in his phrase toresonate with our shared ratbag past, enough residue of our onetime reverence for Mao, enough nostalgia for 1968 to dissolve thetension and turn the talk to other things.

"[A]n eloquent, brave, big-hearted book…about the timeless anxieties and emotions of parenthood, and the modern twists thereon.” —James Fallows, The Atlantic Love That Boy is a uniquely personal story about the causes and costs of outsized parental expectations. What we want for our children—popularity, normalcy, achievement, genius—and what they truly need—grit, empathy, character—are explored by National Journal’s Ron Fournier, who weaves his extraordinary journey to acceptance around the latest research on childhood development and stories of other loving-but-struggling parents.