When A Jew Dies

This account of the traditional customs that are practiced when a Jewish person dies provides an anthropological perspective on Jewish rites of mourning, and explains the cultural meaning behind Jewish practices and traditions.

From beloved New York Times bestselling author and award-winning journalist—the definitive guide to Judaism’s end-of-life rituals, revised and updated for Jews of all backgrounds and beliefs. From caring for the dying to honoring the dead, Anita Diamant explains the Jewish practices that make mourning a loved one an opportunity to experience the full range of emotions—grief, anger, fear, guilt, relief—and take comfort in the idea that the memory of the deceased is bound up in our lives and actions. In Saying Kaddish you will find suggestions for conducting a funeral and for observing the shiva week, the shloshim month, the year of Kaddish, the annual yahrzeit, and the Yizkor service. There are also chapters on coping with particular losses—such as the death of a child and suicide—and on children as mourners, mourning non-Jewish loved ones, and the bereavement that accompanies miscarriage. Diamant also offers advice on how to apply traditional views of the sacredness of life to hospice and palliative care. Reflecting the ways that ancient rituals and customs have been adapted in light of contemporary wisdom and needs, she includes updated sections on taharah (preparation of the body for burial) and on using ritual immersion in a mikveh to mark the stages of bereavement. And, celebrating a Judaism that has become inclusive and welcoming. Diamant highlights rituals, prayers, and customs that will be meaningful to Jews-by-choice, Jews of color, and LGBTQ Jews. Concluding chapters discuss Jewish perspectives on writing a will, creating healthcare directives, making final arrangements, and composing an ethical will.

Forward by Sherwin B. Nuland As Jack Riemer demonstrates in this collection of Jewish resources for mourning and healing, the Jewish tradition has much to offer those who seek its help in time of need. Here are personal as well as practical writings by contemporary authors about the Shivah period, Kaddish, Yizkor, Yahrzeit, and less familiar practices to honor the dead and comfort the living. Some writers describe new rituals that were created to fill special needs. Others raise questions about the tradition: Do Jews believe in an afterlife? How do we mourn the stillborn child? Should we always strive to prolong life? Reflections on these and other issues related to death and dying make this an indispensable resource for coping with some of life's most difficult and sacred moments.

This is a very detailed guide to the traditional aspects of Jewish observances of Death and Mouring. It is a must for every Jew -- Orthodox, Conservative, Reform, or un-affiliated!

A Step-by-Step Guide for Honoring the Dead and Empowering the Living When someone dies, there are so many questions—from what to do in the moment of grief, to dealing with the practical details of the funeral, to spiritual concerns about the meaning of life and death. This indispensable guide to Jewish mourning and comfort provides traditional and modern insights into every aspect of loss. In a new, easy-to-use format, this classic resource is full of wise advice to help you cope with death and comfort others when they are bereaved. Dr. Ron Wolfson takes you step by step through the mourning process, including the specifics of funeral preparations, preparing the home and family to sit shiva, and visiting the grave. Special sections deal with helping young children grieve, mourning the death of an infant or child, and more. Wolfson captures the poignant stories of people in all stages of grieving—children, spouses, parents, rabbis, friends, non-Jews—and provides new strategies for reinvigorating and transforming the Jewish ways we mourn, grieve, remember, and carry on with our lives after the death of a loved one.

"Samuel Heilman has walked the mourner's path both as an anthropologist observing the socio-cultural death practices of the Jewish community, and as a bereaved son grieving the loss of a beloved father. In the wake of his successful navigation through these two worlds—academic and personal—he presents an acute understanding of the detailed intricacies of the cycle of Jewish rituals from deathbed to burial, from mourning to memorialization. Heilman emerges from his journey through grief with a wise and seasoned appreciation of the symbols and practices which are at the foundation of Jewish life and culture. When a Jew Dies provides an insightful roadmap to the subtle and profound vicissitudes of grief in the Jewish tradition. For mourner and scholar alike, this is a book to be savored, a friend to walk with, a companion with which to explore the reality of the walk through the valley of the shadow of death."—Simcha Raphael, author of Jewish Views of the Afterlife "Heilman has an unusually keen sense of perception and ability to put everything into an almost universal, social scientific perspective while, at the same time, retaining his personal ties, thought and feelings. As in his previous work, he here examines something that almost every traditional Jew is familiar with, and gives it new perspectives and new meaning. When a Jew Dies includes significant discussion of prevalent customs and the Jewish bases for them. The author's particularistic-universalistic synthesis as well as his deeply-rooted, personal-scholarly synthesis set this book apart from all others."—Chaim I. Waxman, Professor of Sociology at Rutgers University and author of America's Jews in Transition "Heilman offers a unique synthesis of historical scholarship and ethnographic description in this rich account of the complex processes by which Judaism brings the dying to the end of life and the mourning to the end of grief and a return to life. This is, as far as I know, the only study combining the legal-historical, social-historical, and ethnographic perspectives in a single volume. It offers a remarkable glimpse of how one sector of contemporary Jewry confronts the reality of death and transfigures it."—Martin S. Jaffee, author of Torah in the Mouth

In the third edition of Jewish Views of the Afterlife, Rabbi Simcha Paull Raphael walks readers through the Jewish tradition of the afterlife while providing insights into spiritual care with dying and grieving individuals and families.

Jewish customs and traditions about death, burial and mourning are numerous, diverse and intriguing. They are considered by many to have a respectable pedigree that goes back to the earliest rabbinic period. In order to examine the accurate historical origins of many of them, an international conference was held at Tel Aviv University in 2010 and experts dealt with many aspects of the topic. This volume includes most of the papers given then, as well as a few added later. What emerges are a wealth of fresh material and perspectives, as well as the realization that the high Middle Ages saw a set of exceptional innovations, some of which later became central to traditional Judaism while others were gradually abandoned. Were these innovations influenced by Christian practice? Which prayers and poems reflect these innovations? What do the sources tell us about changing attitudes to death and life-after death? Are tombstones an important guide to historical developments? Answers to these questions are to be found in this unusual, illuminating and readable collection of essays that have been well documented, carefully edited and well indexed.